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Old May 29, 2005, 09:48 AM   #1
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Threatening Messages

Hey All.

I thought I'd post a situation I just got put in out of my will, but it has me uneasy. I have a friend of several years, happens to be a girl. Anyway, we spent time together last night and her current ex-boyfriend started sending text messages to my phone last night around 3:00am. The first one read "you're dead" followed by "you f**ked with the wrong guy, you're going to pay" followed by "I better pick a new career, etc" and then he gave me an ultimatum that if I did not apologize and swear I would never contact ***** again I would "regret" it. I contacted her and said if he didn't stop I would call the police. He messaged me back on my phone and said he never threatened me and that if I were in his shoes...blah blah...and again reminded me that if I didn't apologize by that certain time there would be issues.

Here is the problem. Supposedly he is a computer geek and is going to GPS track my cell phone and find me. That's creepy enough as it is. I woke up this morning and was going to take a shower and go to the local PD and have them read the messages and tell me what my options were...but crazy enough, in my groggy state of re-reading the messages (there were many) I accidently deleted them...I want to punch myself in the face for that. I called my phone provider and they said they can't get them back for me. So, I have no evidence, but am a bit uneasy this guy might try something.

Any thoughts on what should be done? Like I said, I can't get the evidence back. I just hope he messages again so I can have some evidence of threats. I can't watch my six all the time, but last night I slept with my D cell maglight, and handguns staggered around the room for quick access if I took cover or was caught off guard. I don't want to do that every night. I usually just have one on the nightstand and a small flashlight and my cell. I CC my Glock everywhere and usually always have my 642 in a pocket holster, also Spyderco Endura.

This is frustrating me and I feel now, since I have no evidence, I am helpless until he makes the next move. Also, I have not responded to his messages in any way shape or form. Nor plan to.
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Old May 29, 2005, 10:15 AM   #2
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Sounds to me like he's already won.
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Old May 29, 2005, 10:19 AM   #3
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Maintain your composure, be alert without being paranoid. Most of the time these things are nothing but posturing.

It is good to maintain your situational awareness. In the meantime gather evidence and wait.
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Old May 29, 2005, 10:43 AM   #4
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Having the evidence (or not) doesn't mean much anyway. The police have no duty to protect you, or anyone else for that matter, and what's the worst they can do to him? Give him a stern talking to? Perhaps arrest him for communicating a threat?

You could go to court with any future evidence he might provide and maybe get a restraining order, but how many more thousands of people with ROs need to die before everyone figures out how utterly meaningless those pieces of paper are?

Be ready to defend yourself at all times. Remain aware, and if the loser ever sends you another message save it and show it to the cops, but also understand that there is very little they can do about it. The only person you can reasonably expect help from is you.
"This started out as a documentary on gun violence in America, but the largest mass murder in our history was just committed -- without the use of a single gun! Not a single bullet fired! No bomb was set off, no missile was fired, no weapon (i.e., a device that was solely and specifically manufactured to kill humans) was used. A boxcutter! -- I can't stop thinking about this. A thousand gun control laws would not have prevented this massacre. What am I doing?"

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Old May 29, 2005, 10:51 AM   #5
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I think a .45 caliber slug chambered in a barrel ought to go a long was to ease your fear, moreso than it is.

Relax dude--shoot him if he needs shootin. If not, well...
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Old May 29, 2005, 10:55 AM   #6
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Here is the problem. Supposedly he is a computer geek and is going to GPS track my cell phone and find me.
No he won't.
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Old May 29, 2005, 11:00 AM   #7
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Supposedly he is a computer geek and is going to GPS track my cell phone and find me.

If he actually had a clue about cell phone tracking, he would be threatening to use an entirely different method to track you. (You know, like the one that CELL PHONE COMPANIES USE SO THEY CAN PINPOINT YOU FOR 911 CALLS.) What a moron.

Sounds like the guy has some adequacy issues. I guess you may as well go talk to the cops (as in go to a station or call a normal station number, not 911 or anything) for advice and get a CC piece, but that aside, he's probably full of ****.
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Old May 29, 2005, 11:24 AM   #8
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Make the report if it makes you feel better. Other than that, my advice is to keep acting worried, and then wait till he gets in your face- then kick his ass.
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Old May 29, 2005, 11:24 AM   #9
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Some additional info for you.

First, he cannot trace your phone via GPS. True some devices (handsets/phones) do have GPS, but that's only so you can use GPS on your device. No one else, except the mobile operator, has access to this info.

Also, most mobile network operators don't use GPS to track your whereabouts, they already have a method to track locations of phones via the BTS (cell cites) and their method of triangulation. This has been in use for many years to allow successful handovers/handoffs when you are mobile and moving between cell sites (BTSs).

Also, you can request from your local PD that they have the mobile operator enable legal intercept for SMS or MMS messages from his phone number to yours.

Of course this will require the PD issues a warrant so that the mobile operator can set this up legally.

In any case, it's true the mobile operator can't retrieve the messages once they are sent, unless some sort of legal intercept has been enabled to retain this data, the mobile operator does have records that he sent you messages (SMS or MMS). This is how they bill for payment. The local PD can issue a request for these records if you file a complaint of terrorist threat against this individual. If the PD deems it necessary they can petition the billing records from his and your mobile operator to see that messages were indeed sent at a specific time/date.

I'd suggest a visit to your local PD to file a complaint. Then see how they handle it. In any case if they don't follow up ans something negative does happen you'll at least have legal recourse against the PD for not following up on the complaint.

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Old May 29, 2005, 11:48 AM   #10
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Usually, stuff like this is somebody trying to act like a big man. You're probably letting him get you all worked up for nothing. If so, he's already won in a way.

I was surprised - on the news a little while back there was a tenant who was arrested in Miami when he threatened a landlord over the phone. I think the charge was assault. I would call the police and see what they can do; some states have anti-stalking laws, although I'm not sure that would apply. If nothing else, they will have some kind of a record of you having a problem with this guy, in case you end up in court over this.

I can just see you having to beat up or shoot Bill Gates and then he says you made up all this crap about him threatening you.
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Old May 29, 2005, 12:11 PM   #11
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In my state it is illegal to threaten someone and it is also called assault (the actualy physical attack is called battery here). There is also a charge for harrasment by phone as well. Of course with text messaging, the laws may have not caught up with technology yet.
The cell phone company may not help you retrieve the messages unless their is a search warrant and that seems unlikley until a felony has occured (IMHO). The other possibility is to get the police to acquire his cell phone or computer records from his providers. But this would also require search warrants (IMHO).

(Of course you could somehow get him on the terrorist watchlist. Then no warrants would be neccessary at all.)
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Old May 29, 2005, 12:26 PM   #12
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Thanks for your words.

Thanks for all your input guys. I am not afraid of him, but I honestly don't want to fight over something so trivial where one of us could get really hurt...unless I am attacked or feel I am about to be attacked, then the situation will call for a response, whether fists, guns, or knives, or combo of them all would probably be the result.

Again, thanks for your help. I have decided if I get anymore threats, I will save them and report them to the PD, just so it is on record. Until then, just keep situationally aware as usual and have plan a, b, and c in my mind for Murphy.

Also, thanks for the GPS info. I was pretty sure that was bogus, computer geek or no computer geek.

A nice .45 would be great, that's my next purchase. Until then I'll have to be happy with a .40 or 9mm depending on my attire of the day, plus as always the 642.

Happy Memorial Day to all.
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Old May 29, 2005, 12:45 PM   #13
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I have one more suggestion. Issue an ex parte (sp?) order against him. If he text messages again, you can have him charged for violating the order whether he threatens you again or not in his next message. There will also be some kind of record with the courts if he ever does decide to try and kick your a$$ and he there will be more of a likelyhood of a conviction (IMO).

Of course your laws maybe different and in my state there is a review of the facts after thirty days to justify a complete restraining order and the ex parte ends if there isn't enough evidence. But it will still provide a record of complaint and he cannot test msg you again for 30 days.
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Old May 29, 2005, 01:19 PM   #14
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I had a similar situation about 20 years ago, however, not over a girl. During the calls, I gave back as much as I took. The difference was, unlike you, I didn't know who was on the other end of the telephone. He had the advantage. He knew me, I didn't know him.

So for the next several days I became carefully aware of my surroundings. It turned out to be an empty threat...

But you know who is threatening you. And, you know where he lives. I'd take it to the police. File a complaint. Perhaps the police will let him know that if anything happens to you anytime soon, he might become more than just a person of interest.

If the police, for some reason, do not contact him, then spend a couple hundred bucks for an attorney's letter, advising the person making threats, his office is holding a signed, and notarized affidavit from you, that he will release to the police if anything happens to you in the foreseeable future.

In my city the police take reports of harassment, and send a police officer to the residence of the person making the threats with a written warning.

Don't get mad, get even...legally, of course!!!
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Old May 29, 2005, 02:15 PM   #15
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vote for contacting the police...

I had a brother in law who would get out of sorts at the in-laws house. My mother-in-law would call me to handle the situation. I was worried that one of us would eventually get hurt if it became more violent. One day I realized that the police get paid and are trained to do this sort of A victory of brain power over male ego...and terminal colon blockage.

Mother-in-law called, so I called the Police that day and met them at the house. Evidently the police knew him very well

The Officers comments to him were we can do this the easy way or hard way. He chose the easy way. Now when my mother in called after that I told her I was going to call the police. End of problem when I say go he goes....

We had also finished remodeling a house..he was mad about something, called me and threatened to burn it down. I called the Police, they even knew which payphone he used

Now I dont have a problem with him....he knows I mean business and dont put up with his crap. Heck one time he even assualted some arresting officers and got a few knots on the head.

So my suggestion is to utilize the local PD.

The end result is that I dont have this problem anymore when I tell him to leave...because he knows what is going to happen next.

if Geek boy is just horsing around the police showing up at his door may give him second thoughts. People only do that which we allow them to do.
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Old May 30, 2005, 01:40 AM   #16
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And you probably already know this, but be sure not to say something like, "I have a gun, don't eff with me", etc. Some states you can't even brush your shirt back. Some states you can.
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Old May 30, 2005, 06:12 AM   #17
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Unless he is dumber than, well, unless is is really dumb and leaves another text msg, you don't have anything to stand on. At this point, all you can do is watch your 6, or go proactive and take him down.
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Old May 30, 2005, 11:55 AM   #18
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I disagree Mannlicher,
If he applies for a restraining order, then there would be a public record and he would be more protected from a rampant DA if he had to protect himself from this guy.
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Old May 30, 2005, 12:13 PM   #19
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He can still report it to the Police.There would be a record of the individual calling.... If Geek boy isnt serious a Policeman knocking on his door might be the ticket to getting him to stop.

A restraining order wouldnt be a bad idea either because it places something in public record that this guy is a possible menace it if gets more serious and you have to protect yourself.
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Old May 30, 2005, 02:12 PM   #20
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Your purpose and expectation in filing a police report and/or seeking a restraining order in this situation is not be to ge the police or the courts to actually do anything (although they might--never hurts to ask). The purpose is to create a paper trail and record that YOU are the one being stalked, harrassed, and threatened. That way, if you do eventually need to apply reverse first aid to this individual at some point, the record will indicate that YOU were the victim.
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Old May 30, 2005, 02:24 PM   #21
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there is a way for the new phones to be tracked by GPS...was in the local paper.

its a subscription service with the phone provider...log on to the website type in a password and you can see where that phone is at all times....scary stuff.

"Laws that forbid the carrying of arms... disarm only those who are neither inclined nor determined to commit crimes. Such laws make things worse for the assaulted and better for the assailants; they serve to encourage rather than to prevent homicides, for an unarmed man may be attacked with greater confidence than an armed man."

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Old May 30, 2005, 02:37 PM   #22
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"The purpose is to create a paper trail and record that YOU are the one being stalked, harrassed, and threatened."

Exactly!!! Or you could follow this:

"I'd suggest a visit to your local PD to file a complaint. Then see how they handle it. In any case if they don't follow up ans something negative does happen you'll at least have legal recourse against the PD for not following up on the complaint."

Never mind you need help, just call your local police so you will have somebody to sue. I mean really isn't that what life is all about anyway, just finding someone else to blame and hopefully striking it rich filing a nice big lawsuit. What a bunch of BS.

In life you sometimes make enemies, even with the best of intentions. Don't let it rattle you, it probably won't be the last.

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Old May 30, 2005, 04:05 PM   #23
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His technological skills aside, what's the guy really like? I'm not saying to disregard his threats, but sometimes a guy will bluff in the best way he knows, and apparently he believes he's creeped you out enough that he has you on the ropes.

As was said, you need to be alert and pay attention to your surroundings, but I'd really want to know more about the guy making the threat, i.e. does he have a history of violent encounters with others, is he capable of carrying them out, does he have any real life experience with street fighting, martial arts, or any form of training that would justify you're feeling threatened, etc.?

I had a guy mouth off to me in a PM on another board about something so silly it was ridiculous. I guess to prove he could offer up a "cyber threat" he googled my name and showed me what he came up with. What a grasp of technology! Wow, a couple of addresses and phone numbers that haven't been current for nearly four years.

Again, don't disregard the guy's behavior and threats, but I wouldn't be so quick to cede him too much control over your life, based on his lame "you can run, but you can't hide" threats either.

As an added thought, is the cell phone he's using his own, or is it one supplied by his company for his job? May be kind of a reach, but if that phone actually is a piece of equipment paid for by his employer, he's the one who ought to be scared-once his activity is reported to his employer, they'll be liable for his behavior. That's a discussion you really don't want to have with your boss.
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Old May 30, 2005, 04:55 PM   #24
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Duct tape your cell phone to a Doberman's butt and don't feed the dog.

Take the lady out to enjoy a nice meal and a movie.

If text message boy shows up, knock him out with a ball bat.

Seriously, one of the things that I learned as I got older is that some females get a thrill out of this kind of garbage. It's a case of follow the indicators here. How does he know you were anywhere with her? How does he know your name or your phone number? Get the picture? Drop her unless you intend to marry her. She isn't worth the trouble, not even as a friend. If she doesn't have the common sense to have an intelligent boyfriend, who needs her as a friend? A worn out house shoe is a better friend than some women.

Now if you intend to marry her, that's another issue, obviously she is worth it, and you should deal with text message boy quickly, smartly and effectively. Then seek psychiatric help because she will continue this behavior for her own ego gratification.
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Old May 30, 2005, 05:32 PM   #25
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Get a nice romanic getaway with the little lady and put this dumb s*** out of your thoughts.

A man who's got the B***s to do something sure isn't going to telegraph what his intentions are. He's just going to go and zap ya!

To get zapped now with all these text messages on your phone, the threats, etc. would surely get him some state paid time, or at the least, cost him an arm and a leg in legal fee's!

As for putting a GPS on your car, that might be a tad illegal, plus the cost, if he wants to track you by your cell phone, turn off the gps feature. On my phone I have the option, can either be tracted by everyone, or shut down the gps feature except when I dial 911....have verizon!

Finally, as "measure" of good will towards the homeless, invite the mother over, then hire the biggest, meanest, homeless dude you can find to answer the door...when the dude brings up the little lady, have the homeless guy answer, "Oh, yea, your seeing the kinky one!"

I'd put the slime ball to the back of my mind, he's gutless!
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