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December 24, 2023, 08:06 AM | #1 |
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Join Date: December 6, 2014
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Twas The Night Before Christmas (Reloader's Version)
Twas the night before Christmas, cold, dark and foreboding,
as I sat at the workbench, quite busy reloading. The empties from autumn were polished so clear for primers and powder, and bullets from Speer and Sierra boat-tails, and Nosler's Partitions (My bench ain't no place for brand name omissions!) All sat in their boxes, right next to the press with dies from Midway, and RCBS When all of a sudden there came such a jolt, I grabbed for my Mossberg, and whipped out my Colt. As I spilled Hodgdon's powder all over the shelf I scrambled for cover, just to protect myself. From up on the rooftop, came hoof beats and snorting Like the noise out of L'il Rock, from Clinton's cavorting! I eased off the safety, to press-check my auto, with 230-hardball, I'd knock'em all blotto. Were these rogue federal agents, sent by Schumer and Reno? Or a staggering Ted Kennedy, in bad need of vino? My question was answered with a knock, and some sneezing, "It's Santa, you moron, lemme in there, I'm freezing!" I flipped off the dead-bolt and threw the door open wide, to find St. Nick a'shivering, Rudolph by his side. He eyeballed my Thompson, with a nod of approval "You're all set," he said, "for dirtball removal." "But this is no raid, we're not here to harm you Or persecute, prosecute, or even disarm you." "Instead," said dear Santa, "I need to borrow your .357, 'till day after tomorrow." "It's okay," he assured me, with a hint of frustration. "I'm enrolled in the National Rifle Association." He showed me his card, 'twas a Life Member rating "I've had this since me and the missus were dating!" "And you see, ol' buddy, I've gotten real nervous since Feinstein was elected, with a promise to serve us." "So henceforth as I'm out there, my presents a'stackin' I want to assure you, I'm legally packin'." "And my gift for you this year, should give you a hoot." "I've told the Supreme Court to give Brady the boot!" "Now, Rudy and I must be on our way." He said, as he climbed back on the seat of his sleigh. With the reins in his hand, and my Smith in his pocket He jingled the sleigh bells and was off like a rocket. With a pair of speed loaders, and ammo to spare I knew he'd be safe, he was loaded for bear. As he faded from view, I could still hear him calling: "From D.C., where 'P.C.' is already falling, to bad guys in L.A., Detroit and Atlanta: I'm ready and I carry, so don't be messin' with Santa!" MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
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"I believe that people have a right to decide their own destinies; people own themselves. I also believe that, in a democracy, government exists because (and only so long as) individual citizens give it a 'temporary license to exist'—in exchange for a promise that it will behave itself. In a democracy, you own the government—it doesn't own you."- Frank Zappa |
December 24, 2023, 10:14 AM | #2 |
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Join Date: October 22, 2010
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Nice!
--Wag--
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"Great genius will always encounter fierce opposition from mediocre minds." --Albert Einstein. |
December 24, 2023, 04:55 PM | #3 |
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Join Date: March 28, 1999
Location: Tucson, AZ
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Too good to not pass on.
Paul B.
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COMPROMISE IS NOT AN OPTION! |
December 25, 2023, 05:28 PM | #4 | |
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Join Date: April 28, 2013
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