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Old September 29, 2012, 07:55 PM   #51
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Been married a-LONG time It's a give & take kind a deal. She gives & I take Yaa Right Got to have a good relatonship from the start.

I peed away money in the early years, She set me straight, Now Home paid for money in bank & I still hav'nt bought a gun in a 1-1/2 years.

Time is getting closer & I want a 357 lever action. PS I have about all the guns I need But yall' know how that goes ; ) Good Luck & treat em right
There's a GATOR in the bushes & She's Callin my name
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Old September 29, 2012, 07:57 PM   #52
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I don't make a purchase without my wife. She usually is right there on board when it comes to buying ammo or whatever. She has a pistol that I bought her so I am slowly taking it from being my hobby to our hobby. She doesn't let it take priority over other things but she does let me make a lot more purchases then many husbands that I know.
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Old September 29, 2012, 10:26 PM   #53
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to the OP...get her a nice .22 cal pistol, then take her shooting. My wife has been my partner/best friend/hunting partner etc for the last 45 years...only requirement I debt, no purchasing without the money in the pocket.

We went hunting, but we did not purchase many new weapons when there were 5 kids in the house...but they are all grown, gone with their own families now, so it is back to must have cash in hand...then we go look together (pretty much know what we are looking for too...last purchase was for her,)
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Old September 29, 2012, 10:31 PM   #54
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Does your wife enforce a limit on guns & ammo purchasing?

Yes, as long as I buy more pheasant and dove shells for her than my nasty pistol rounds.
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Old September 30, 2012, 12:15 AM   #55
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I've been single since 1975 and vowed never to re-marry. Since I do as I please, I gave the OP some thought. I wouldn't allow a woman or anyone else to dictate what I spend money on. I am a responsible person who has been on his own since the age of 17 and I always cover my bills and necessities.

If I were in your relationship, I'd want a certain amount of money per week for "pocket money". If I spent that money, it was gone. If I was careful and saved a portion of it, that would go in my hobby "stash." When I saved enough, the cash would be mine to spend as I wanted to .

I am retired and live on a very small pension. I give myself $50/week and if I don't spend it, the money goes in my hobby stash. Every Wednesday, I get $50 more. If I choose to spend it later, it's not budget money and I do so with a clear conscience. That money does not cover gas, food or other living essentials. It is just pocket money. Right now, there is about $400 in the "stash."

No one would ever tell me how to spend my money or put a limit on me.

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Old September 30, 2012, 12:41 AM   #56
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My wife will occasionally ask how much a new purchase costs and even inquire as to how many guns I own. But she never gets upset or tells me I should have bought a new gun or ammunition. She likes the fact that I have a hobby that I truly enjoy.
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Old September 30, 2012, 04:31 AM   #57
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My wife doesn't. Our single-income finances, however, do.
Seen on a bumper sticker: "Exercise. Eat right. Take vitamins. Die anyway."
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Old September 30, 2012, 09:51 AM   #58
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Wife "enforcer"?

I have been married to the same woman for 52 years. She has never tried to "enforce" anything. It is incumbent on every man to live within budget constraints, moreso earlier than later. That said, if the house is secure, the larder is filled, children are clothed and there remains a little excess in the budget its expenditure is negotiable. If negotiation is not an option I think I would be looking for a change in my lifestyle.
If you're gonna get old you better be tough;Gettin' old ain't for sissies!!
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Old September 30, 2012, 03:10 PM   #59
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As a female shooter, I'd have to say the only restriction I have on the number of firearms I purchase would be financial. I'm a stay at home mom, and my husband is extremely supportive of my shooting. However, we have two very young children and also need a new roof for our home, so any extra money we can save up would need to go for the roof, as well as bills.

Now if I was married to any of the male posters in this thread, we'd probably have twice as many firearms, but we'd also be in debt. For now I'm trying to experiment with different firearms that people at the range are kind enough to let me borrow. Also, the range has firearms to rent, though I haven't tried that yet.
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Old September 30, 2012, 03:23 PM   #60
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I've been married twice.
It was made clear before hand that they would have no say in my hobbies, period.
That's not to say I didn't take care of the bills first.
Could be why I'm not married now, which is also fine with me.
I like the idea of marriage but I'm not a fan of the realty of it.
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Old September 30, 2012, 03:34 PM   #61
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Great post Anna....thanks for sharing from your perspective! You are wise
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Old September 30, 2012, 09:25 PM   #62
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What she doesn't know wont hurt her, just spent $2300 on an Ed Brown she wont ever know about.(kidding) She knows I get all the bills paid and she pretty much gets what she wants so she doesn't bother me with my hobbie. If she asks I'll let her know but that has yet to come up in 12 yrs since we have been married.

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Old September 30, 2012, 09:53 PM   #63
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After 33 years of marriage raising 3 kids and being chronically poor I've managed a meager gun collection.

I've dealt with the stare, the cold shoulder and even a cold bed and survived it all until about 10 years ago, she up and changed tactics.

I want a new gun no problem except now a $500. gun costs me 1k, $500 for me $500. for her.

I've learned to appreciate the one's I own and forget about new unless I can trade for it.
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Old October 1, 2012, 12:08 AM   #64
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I have most of the guns I have owned over my lifetime. Several of my hunting guns were bought for me by my wife as gifts. I bought most of the handguns. I don't plan to buy anymore but would not have a problem with her if I did. We have been married for 55 yrs.
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Old October 1, 2012, 08:58 AM   #65
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as long as my wife can get her hair done every 6 to 7 weeks she says the rest of the money is mine.
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Old October 2, 2012, 06:41 AM   #66
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the paycheck limits me

she did ask how much money all the shells cost because I went trap shooting 1-2 a week all spring/summer, I told her and she said next year you buy 5000shells straight away (cheaper that way)

she earns more then me which some of you probably find disturbing but I really don't care, I benefit from her surplus anyway, mostly with trips and she has a nicer car then me
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Old October 2, 2012, 07:32 AM   #67
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I want to know more about two live in girl friends!!
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Old October 2, 2012, 07:35 AM   #68
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I want to know how he affords two of them!
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Old October 2, 2012, 08:00 AM   #69
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Only for what we can afford at any given time. Home finances come first.
NRA Life Member, NRA Range Safety Officer, NRA Certified Pistol Instructor,, USPSA NROI Range Officer,
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Old October 2, 2012, 10:06 AM   #70
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My spending has essentially been strangled in the last year. I have the skills portion of my law enforcement certification coming up, which is a $12k bomb right there, my wife is in grad school for her ACNP degree, and we have a 1-year-old.

The old deal was that we each got $40 a pay period to do whatever we want with, which I was able to supplement by teaching CCW classes. I got to keep all the money I made doing that. But I'm not a primary instructor, and I haven't been able to get in on a class since April. Our numbers have really dried out. And $20 a week means not a lot of shooting gets done, as I can either choose to save for guns or buy a little ammo. Plus if I buy lunch at work ever, it goes fast.

My wife does have a bit of a control issue and probably spends at least as much as I do on my hobbies on things for my son that he doesn't actually need, but I still feel guilty pointing that out because it's not actually for 'her.'

Honestly we're just not at a stage in life where we can afford to make purchases like guns without a lot of prior planning, saving, and mutual consultation.
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Old October 2, 2012, 11:41 PM   #71
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"I want to know more about two live in girl friends!!"

My guess would be that one of 'em is a golden retriever.
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Old October 3, 2012, 12:51 AM   #72
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My limit is what I if I don't like it, I don't buy it

I have sold many firearms and then any money made went back to guns. So i have a collection. My wife was skeptical about the whole "guns are an investment" thing but I proved it to her. I don't buy brand new glocks and then say "I paid $400, now they're $600" I might buy a WWII P38 for $500 and sell for $700 - and actually net something. Then I reinvest the $700.

We do also have our accounts split. She was costing me too much gun money when our accounts were together

She does still nag sometimes. Sometimes she thinks it gets in the way of us moving (I buy guns with the money that she would put in savings). But I tell her that I make more than the bank pays. Then she says "but some you won't sell" and to that I say "but I can". We work it out and no matter what I buy, its usually peaceful now.
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Old October 4, 2012, 07:07 AM   #73
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Interesting thread. Reminds me of when I was a Motorcycle Safety Foundation instructor, and found out how many men weren't "allowed" to have a motorcycle by their wives. I've been married to the same woman for 46+ years, and she has always feared and hated guns. Despite my trying for much of those 46 years she has never been even willing to try shooting, even for her own self defense when I am not around. She knows that I own guns, but doesn't ask me how many I have, and I don't ever talk about guns to her. She does know that I keep one loaded handgun available for home defense and have others in a safe, but that's about it. She would not have a clue if asked how many guns or how much ammo I have, any more than I would know if asked how much fabric she keeps on hand, or how many quilts she is working on, etc. Part of this is a matter of money, i.e., really significant purchases, like $15,000 for a new motorcycle, is something I would not do without talking with my wife, but $500 for a gun is fortunately something I can do without affecting the household finances. And to keep the peace, I don't get in her face about guns, like the one I bought yesterday and can pick up in 3 days. I'll just quietly get it, put it away and not make an issue out of it. After I drop dead she can fret over the guns and do with them whatever she wants to do.
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Old October 4, 2012, 09:36 AM   #74
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As for mine, she is still afraid of guns but slowly breaking down and willing to come with me on a range trip some day. Ill keep working on her but I digress....
I didn't read the whole thread, so I apologize if this has been said already. Your problem is that you keep working on her. My wife was the same way. I "worked" on her for three years before I basically gave up. Nothing I said would convince her. Then, earlier this year, March I think, I saw a flyer for a woman's beginner's handgun class. I talked to one of her friends who liked shooting and asked her if she'd be interested in doing that class with my wife. She said she was, so I asked her to invite my wife. And that, as they say, is that. She had a blast. She was still a bit apprehensive about guns after that, but she was more willing to go and shoot.

Today, she has her handgun (Sig SP2022) and her CCW permit. I discovered that a lot of time, a woman's apprehension about shooting is that it's some kind of boys club. If you can get her to go to a course for women by women, she might be more open to it. If you have to, make her a deal. Tell her if she goes to that class, you'll do something that she's been wanting, or something like that.

Essentially, quit working on her, and find something that might appeal to her. This article does a good job explaining it.

And here's another one that explains why all women classes might be better for a woman than a co-ed class:

Oh, and one of my favorite articles by the same author (I wish I had read this before my wife got into shooting):
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Old October 4, 2012, 10:30 AM   #75
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The title gave me a good chuckle.

It would never occur to me to inform the old woman of any acquisitions, firearms or otherwise.

Nor would I expect to hear about any of her latest purchases. Which is fine, because I can't imagine myself in heels...
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