July 31, 2011, 11:08 AM | #1 |
Staff In Memoriam
Join Date: October 31, 2007
Location: Western Florida panhandle
Posts: 11,069
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No scratches allowed!!!!
THE DEAD PARROT
At dawn the telephone rings, "Hello, Señor Rod? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house." "Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?" "Um, I am just calling to advise you, Señor Rod, that your parrot, he is dead". "My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?" "Si, Señor, that's the one." "That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?" "From eating the rotten meat, Señor Rod." "Rotten meat? Who fed him rotten meat?" "Nobody, Señor. He ate the meat of the dead horse." "Dead horse? What dead horse?" "The thoroughbred, Señor Rod." "My prize thoroughbred is dead?" "Yes, Señor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart." "Are you insane? What water cart?" "The one we used to put out the fire, Señor." "Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?" "The one at your house, Señor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire." "What? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle?!" "Yes, Señor Rod." "But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?" "For the funeral, Señor Rod." "WHAT FUNERAL???!!!""Your wife's, Señor Rod". She showed up very late one night and I thought she was a thief, so I shot her with your new Kreighoff Limited Edition Custom Gold Engraved Trap Special with the custom Wenig Exhibition Grade Stock. SILENCE........... LONG SILENCE.........VERY LONG SILENCE. "Ernesto, if you scratched that shotgun, you're in deep do-do." |
July 31, 2011, 02:55 PM | #2 |
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Join Date: February 23, 2005
Posts: 13,195
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Makes perfectly good sense to me ....???
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July 31, 2011, 10:05 PM | #3 |
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Join Date: November 14, 2010
Location: Northern Virginia
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hogdogs
LoL
You got me banned for 24 hours on a British forum that I'm a Moderator for that dead parrot joke.
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Chief stall mucker and grain chef Country don't mean dumb. Steven King. The Stand |
July 31, 2011, 11:01 PM | #4 | |
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Join Date: March 14, 2010
Location: Border of Idaho & Montana
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Quote:
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Shot placement is everything! I would rather take a round of 50BMG to the foot than a 22short to the base of the skull. all 26 of my guns are 45/70 govt, 357 mag, 22 or 12 ga... I believe in keeping it simple. Wish my wife did as well... |
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July 31, 2011, 11:10 PM | #5 | ||
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Join Date: November 14, 2010
Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 1,824
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Deja vu
Quote:
I'm the American Redheaded step child Edit: Quote:
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Chief stall mucker and grain chef Country don't mean dumb. Steven King. The Stand Last edited by egor20; July 31, 2011 at 11:22 PM. |
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