Rambling Anecdotes

[4V50 Gary]

Where have we heard this before?

RICHMOND [VA] WHIG, March 18, 1864, p. 1, c. 4
A Cure for Corpulence.—A philanthropist has lately laid his story before the public, and although the record may provoke a passing smile, yet no one who reads it can doubt the correctness and sincerity of the writer, or his hearty desire to benefit his fellow creatures. It is simply the narrative of a man who was tremendously fat, who tried hard for years on years to thin himself, and who was at least successful. He wished to let the world know how he had vanquished his terrible enemy, and how at last the demon of corpulence fled from him. This is really a great kindness, and a man who, without fear of ridicule, and simply from benevolent motives, comes forward to reveal an experience of this kind, is doing a service which his fellow-creatures ought to recognize. Mr. Banting, the gentleman who has had the courage and good feeling to write and publish this narrative, not long ago measured five feet five inches, and weighted about fourteen stone and a quarter. He owns that he had a great deal to bear from his unfortunate make; in the first place, the little boys in the street laughed at him; in the next place he could not tie his own shoes; and lastly, he had, it appears, to come down stairs backwards. But he was a man who struggled gallantly, and whatever he was recommended to do he honestly tried to carry out. He drank mineral waters, consulted physicians, and took sweet counsel with innumerable friends, but all was in vain. He lived upon sixpence a day, and earned it, so the favorite recipe of Abernathy failed in his case. He went into all sorts of vapor baths and shampooing baths. He took no less than ninety Turkish baths, but nothing did him any good; he was still as fat as ever. A kind friend recommended increased bodily exertion every morning, and nothing seemed more likely to be effectual than rowing. So this stout warrior, with fat, got daily into a good, safe, heavy boat, and rowed a couple of hours. But he was only pouring water into the bucket of Danaides.—What he gained in one way he lost in another.—His muscular vigor increased, but then, with this there came a prodigious appetite, which he felt compelled to indulge, and consequently he got even fatter than he had been. At last he hit upon the right adviser, who told him what to do, and whose advice was so successful that Mr. Banting can now walk down stairs forwards, put his clothes quite over the suit that now fits him, and, far from being made the victim of unkind or ill-judged chaff, is universally congratulated on his pleasant and becoming appearance. The machinery by which this change was effected was of a very simple kind. He was simply told to leave off eating anything but meat. It appears that none of his numerous friendly advisers, and none of the physicians he consulted, penetrated so far into the secrecy of his domestic habits as to have discovered that twice a day he used formerly to indulge in bowls of bread and milk. The Solomon who saved him, cut off this great feeder of fat, and since then Mr. Banting has been a thinner and happier man.—London Saturday Review.

I have the honour, Sirs, to be your friendly correspondent at TFL and

Your Humble and Obedient Servant,

4v50 Gary

Edited: Here's more and this time, you get to have your nightcap!

RICHMOND [VA] WHIG, July 18, 1864, p. 1, c. 2
The Cure for Corpulency.—Mr. Banting's Course of Treatment.—The means by which Mr. Banting managed to reduce his physical proportions may be interesting to some of our readers. Breakfast—four or five ounces of beef, mutton, kidneys, boiled fish, bacon, or cold meat of any kind except pork, a large cup of tea (without milk or sugar) and one ounce of dry toast. Dinner—five or six ounces of any fish except salmon, any meat except pork, any vegetables except potatoes, one ounce of dry toast, fruit out of any pudding, any kind of poultry or game, and two or three glasses of good claret. Nightcap, if required, a tumbler of grog, (gin, whisky, or brandy, without sugar), or a glass or two of claret or sherry. The quantities of the different articles specified in this liberal diet roll, Mr. Banting states, must be left to the natural appetite, but for himself he took at breakfast six ounces of solid and eight of liquid; at dinner, eight ounces of solid and eight of liquid; at tea, three ounces of solid and six of liquid; and the nightcap he introduces to show that it is not injurious, whilst for the encouragement of smokers it may be mentioned that tobacco is allowable. When Mr. Banting began this treatment in August, 1862, he weighed 202 lbs., and after a year's perseverance in it, in September, 1863, he had lost 46 lb., and reduced his girth 12¼ inches.

[grymster2007]

Excellent! Can't wait to tell Mrs. Grymster that my new diet will require 3 lbs. of filets a day! Oh yeah.... think it'd be OK to wash them down with half a bottle of 1995 Marguax Marguax?... only the dinnertime ones!

BTW: This is an excellent thread Gary and I thank you for all the effort that you put in to it.

[4V50 Gary]

Here's another tidbit from the past. The comment about perspiration is notable and I had a friend who deblued his Ruger MK I because of his "acid" hands.

Rust on Guns.

In keeping a gun from rust always use animal oil and never let a gun remain rusty long. If a soldier wants to clean a rusty gun, he should first procure fine sand, which is easy obtained after a rain in water courses, mix it with oil, then scour all the rust off, if any rust remains it is apt to poison the iron and cannot be got off without great labor. Perspiration is a great enemy to iron; a soft tallow candle is good to prevent rust, and to kill rust first rub the rusty place with tallow, then put it in the sun shine, when it gets warm then rub the rust off, if the rust leaves a stain or holes always scour it out—lard oil is the best oil we can procure now. Always after a days shooting wash your gun out, wipe it dry inside and outside, then if the sun is shining put it in the sunshine and when warm wipe with a little oil; it is bad to oil the inside too much, for it will dampen the powder and render the gun useless until the charge is drawn; when the ball is drawn fill the barrel with water and let it remain for a quarter of an hour and then you can wash all out. One oiled rag can be used many times without adding oil to it, always prevent the air if possible, from getting inside of your rifle. I wish to give our soldiers as good advise [sic] as I can, hoping my advise [sic] will benefit them. Although old and not in the field, I wish to help as much as possible, and in a few days you will hear from me again.
H.
I fully endorse the above as my experience in rifle shooting, &c.
E. H. Rogers.

DAILY CONSTITUTIONALIST [AUGUSTA, GA], July 9, 1864, p. 2, c. 1

[4V50 Gary]

Yankee Workshop can give you all you want; yours for the asking.

SAVANNAH [GA] REPUBLICAN, August 1, 1863, p. 1, c. 2

A Substitute for Soap.

Editor Savannah Republican:
As soap is very scarce and dear, it will be a great relief to our noble soldiers and their families, and so the public generally, to inform them that saw dust will clean the hands and face better than soap, and in half the time. This is particularly the case with blacksmiths and those that are used to heavy work.
In places where saw dust is scarce, a hair sifter should be used to pour the water from the washbasin to catch the saw dust, as it can be used over again as often as you please, either wet or dry. By using this economy a peck of saw dust would wash a regiment of soldiers for years; and it has another advantage, it does not smart the eyes like soap. [rest of article torn off]

[4V50 Gary]

Because TFL is going to teach you how to make your own shoes good enough for a black tie event. Imagine a model strolling down the runway with a pair of these puppies adorning her feet.

SAVANNAH [GA] REPUBLICAN, August 28, 1863, p. 2, c. 2
Squirrel Skin Shoes.—Squirrel skins tacked down to a board, the hair next to the board, with hickory ashes sprinkled over them for a few days, to facilitate the removal of the hair, and then placed in a strong decoction of red oak bark will, at the end of four days, make excellent leather, far stronger and tougher than calf skin. Four skins will make a pair of ladies shoes. We hear that the ladies of some of the interior counties are wearing these shoes, and find them equal in softness and superior in durability to any other. The longer the skins are left in the decoction of bark the better the leather. By this plan anybody may have a tanyard, and make their own leather, as the skins are easily and cheaply procured, and any vessel holding a gallon will serve as a vat. Any one will do well to try it.—Richmond Whig.

If you don't like squirrel shoes, how about traditional cowhide for shoe material?

DAILY CONSTITUTIONALIST [AUGUSTA, GA], April 10, 1862, p. 2, c. 5

From the Southern Federal Union.
Raw Hide Shoes.

A few weeks since I casually heard one of the most intelligent planters of Georgia, and who also plants largely in Texas, giving a description of this article, and believing that the manner of preparing them would be useful to a people who are fighting a powerful enemy without and a worse enemy within our midst, the vile and detestable extortioner, I procured for publication the following statement.
Baldwin.

Raw Hide Texas Shoes.

Capt. Clark Owens, of Texana, Jackson county, Texas, has a company of eighty men, now stationed at Houston, Texas, defending the coast and city of Galveston; many of these gallant soldiers are well shod with the raw hide shoes, which in symmetry and utility are not behind the best shoes used in our Southern Confederacy. The beef hide hide [sic] is placed in water and ashes and remains there until the hair will come off, the hide is then soaked in fresh water and rubbed until the lye is extracted; it is then soaked from 48 to 60 hours in strong salt and water; this prevents the hide from ever becoming hard and horny; it is then dried in the open air, not in the sun, and then beat with a maul or mallet until it becomes pliable as leather; it is then made into shoes as shoemakers make other shoes; upper part and soles are all of this prepared raw hide and made by sewing or pegging on the soles. The shoes are then well greased with oil, hog’s lard or tallow, greased all over the outside, both upper and bottom parts; this renders the shoes water-proof and in every way as valuable as the best leather shoes. These shoes are made with the grain or hair side outside, and in every respect are a cheap and valuable shoe.

[4V50 Gary]

TFL brings you hoisery, well, sorta.

SAVANNAH [GA] REPUBLICAN, October 19, 1863, p. 1, c. 4

A Substitute for Socks.
[Correspondent of the Register & Advertiser]

Marion Station, Oct. 7, 1863
In your issue of the 23d inst. I noticed a letter from a soldier on the subject of "covering for our soldiers." Many an appeal will, no doubt, soon be made to that effect, and I feel confident will be nobly responded to by the patriotic self-sacrificing ladies of the South.—Woolen socks will be needed; nevertheless, as there may be many a soldier who will be sadly deficient and unprovided in that respect, owing to the high price of wool, and to the growing scarcity of cotton, I thought it might not come amiss to call the attention of the soldiers to the following facts that came under my notice while travelling in Europe. During a winter's stay in France, I noticed that, as a general thing, the peasantry and soldiers wore no socks at all, but spread in the bottom of the boot or shoe a layer of soft beaten straw or hay, of sufficient thickness, without producing any pressure on the foot; the reason of this is obvious, since any pressure on the foot prevents the circulation of the blood, and consequently causes cold feet. The novelty of the system induced me to try the experiment, and I can, therefore, from experience, testify to its utility in point of comfort and economy; for while I used hay as a substitute, I never suffered from cold feet, nor had even occasion to grieve o'er

"Heel-worn, to [illegible] sock",
The greatest of all griefs, to bachelors of three score."

The advantage of the substitute I have suggested will appear plain, when its philosophy is considered, for what are generally the external causes that produce cold feet, beside the one above mentioned? Want of cleanliness, socks seldom or never washed. But allow even these to be clean, yet the moisture which arises from perspiration, and is absorbed by the socks being unable to evaporate, renders them damp, and necessarily produces cold feet; but all this is obviated by the simple substitute I have suggested. Moreover the hay so far from hurting the feet, by producing a gentle friction has a tendency to worm them, while any moisture arising, meeting with no absorbing surface, evaporates as rapidly as engendered, and thus the feet are kept dry and warm.
If necessity, the mother of invention, taught those trans-atlantic savages, perhaps centuries ago, the use of hay as a comfortable substitute for socks, let not our high toned soldiery, in this our pressing necessity, and in this enlightened country, consider it a retrograde step in civilization to "go and do likewise." I would advise them to give it at least a trial; and, if it is found to answer, let the wool be saved, be used in providing warm clothes for the "covering of our soldiers."
In view of the approaching winter, I have frequently mentioned these facts to the soldiers in the hospital, with the request to communicate them to their comrades, on returning to their respective comrades; but believing that my object will be more speedily accomplished by giving publicity to them through your columns, I determined to write to you, leaving it to your judgment to reject or insert this communication, if you think it proper.
With sentiments of the highest respect, I remain, gentlemen, yours, etc.
F. W. Damus,
Chaplain, P. A. C. S.

[4V50 Gary]

Like buying a car, don't get taken. Take your time, shop & compare.

NASHVILLE DAILY UNION, May 15, 1862, p. 2, c. 4

Fast Horse Swapping.

A physician of Wilson county informs us that while riding along the road some ten miles from Lebanon, on the morning when Morgan's gang was cut to pieces, he met a rebel soldier galloping along on a horse half-dead with fatigue. The rebel drew his pistol on the physician and ordered him to swap horses immediately. Which urgent demand our friend readily complied with, thus getting a very poor in exchange for a very fine horse. The physician mounted and jogged along on his new steed for near half a mile, when he met another guerrilla, also riding as though the devil was close after him. Rebel number two also presented his little hostile arrangement, and requested an immediate transaction in horse flesh. The doctor again complied, and got on his second horse. He trudged slowly along the road on his worn-out and panting Rosinante for nearly a mile when a third guerrilla came plunging towards him, who also, like his predecessors, made an exhibition of belligerent machinery, accompanied with a proposition to swap horses, and a request to be d----d quick about it. The doctor had by this time got so used to such sudden commercial transactions, and losing any foolish attachment for his horse, just in proportion to the rapidity of his exchanges, that he smilingly got down a fourth time, and then, like John Gilpin, "got up again." Long before he reached his home he repeated this horse swapping, or rather had it repeated for him, no less than six times, he being rather passive in the business. The last horse he got was a very fine one, and better than the first. We have heard of places being so hot that "there was no time for swapping knives," but it appears that the hotter a place gets the better it is for swapping horses! This is the way in which these guerrillas get horses. Whenever a horse gets fatigued the first rider or team is topped and a trade is forced.

[FL-Flinter]

Gary,

The sawdust washing agent works but it has to be from hardwood - use wet.

[4V50 Gary]

Thanks FL-Flinter, but a few years back Cost-Plus had a sale on soap. Ten cents a bar. Still got some. I'll defer on the sawdust for now.

Here's one on the Irish.

MEMPHIS DAILY APPEAL [ATLANTA, GA], October 24, 1863, p. 2, c. 6
The color-bearer of the 10th Tennessee, (Irish), having been shot down in the battle of Chickamauga, the Colonel ordered one of the privates to take the colors. Pat, who was loading at the time, replied: "By the holy St. Patrick, Colonel, there's so much good shooting here I haven't a minute's time to waste fooling with that thing."--Rebel.

[4V50 Gary]

and shares the secret of curing a sore throat. Kids, don't try this at home.

[MARSHALL] TEXAS REPUBLICAN, January 7, 1860, p. 4, c. 1
To Cure Sore Throat.—Take the whites of two eggs and beat them with two spoonsful of white sugar; grate in a little nutmeg, and then add a pint of luke warm water. Stir well, and drink often. Repeat the prescription if necessary, and it will cure the most obstinate case of hoarseness in a short time.

Here's another cure. Both are probably better than syrup of snail.

WEEKLY COLUMBUS [GA] ENQUIRER, March 4, 1862, p. 1, c. 5
Malone's Mixture for a Cough or Cold.—Take one tea cup of flax seed, soak it all night; in the morning put in a kettle two quarts of water; a handful, split up, of liquorice root; one quarter of a pound of raisins, broke in half. Let them broil till the strength is thoroughly extracted, then add that flax seed which has been previously soaked. Let all boil half an hour more, watching and stirring, that the mixture may not burn. Then strain, and add lemon juice and sugar to the taste. Take any quantity of it cold through the day, and half a tumblerful of the above mixture warm at night. The recipe is excellent.

[FL-Flinter]

Let me clarify that sawdust post....

It works when used as the abrasive, when combined with soap it works better. It's less irritating than pumice but does the same function for getting the ground-in crud off your hands. When combined with dish detergent lather, the saw dust does a better job of cleaning off engine/diesel dirt than most of the expensive hand cleaners.

First reply made it sound like that's all I used... nope, there's soap added and I don't strain my dust either, it's a one-time use thing.

[4V50 Gary]

or kick the brat out.

SAVANNAH [GA] REPUBLICAN, January 24, 1861, p. 1, c. 1
A Sensible Landlord.—An exchange says: A little incident transpired some time ago, at one of our hotels, which is worthy of notice.
A little girl entered the bar room and in pitiful tones told the keeper that her mother had sent her there to get eight cents.
"Eight cents!" said the keeper.
"Yes, sir."
"What does your mother want with eight cents? I don't owe her anything."
"Well," said the child, "father spends all his money here for rum, and we have nothing to eat to-day. Mother wants to buy a loaf of bread."
A loafer remarked to the bar-keeper to "kick the brat out."
"No," said the bar-keeper, "I'll give her the money, and if her father comes back again I'll kick him out."

Thanks for the clarification Fl-flinter. I can see where the sawdust would add an abrasive effect to help remove the dirt.

[4V50 Gary]

Hopefully they never went anywhere.

SEMI-WEEKLY NEWS [San Antonio, TX], November 17, 1862, p. 2, c. 1

A Worthy Example.

On Tuesday evening last we happened in at the long Hall, on the North side of Main Plaza in our city, and there saw a company drilling "for the war." This is a new company just raised, and no conscripts either. It is composed of men whose age would exclude them from military duty. The captain is an Octogenarian, and we would even now rather be after half dozen live Yankees than have him after us. He has an eye that does not need spectacles to draw a bead on a Yankee at a distance of 600 yards. This was the first meeting, we learn, of the Company, and it already numbers over sixty names. They meet twice a week, armed and equipped with guns, pistols and Bowie Knives and a supply of ammunition. The majority of the company are over fifty years of age—and among them we saw those who fought at San Jacinto, those who were of the forlorn hope of "Deaf Smith at the burning of the bridge,"—those who were in the Santa Fe expedition in the Mexican war, the millionare by the side of the poor man; those who have been Captains and Colonels, Judges, Senators, and Members of Congress, and who have sons and grandsons in the army,--all standing side by side, going through the drill of the soldier. It was a grand and noble spectacle, and one we shall never forget. Noble men,--they have passed through many a struggle already in this life, and are now volunteers in defence of their homes and families. All this speaks with a voice not to be mistaken, and woe be to an enemy that shall attempt to wrest from such patriots the homes and inheritance already sealed to them by their own blood.

[4V50 Gary]

Gawd should have struck down that place over a century ago.

DAILY CONSTITUTIONALIST [AUGUSTA, GA], April 26, 1864, p. 4, c. 2
Too Many Babies.—The San FranciscoBulletin, in an article, says that “dead babies are found of late in an abundance and quite appalling—they are found everywhere, on corners and in cellars. It seems impossible for a man to dig potatoes in a garden, or excavate a post gate in his front yard, without turning up some little innocent that has been dumped there without coffin or shroud. Yesterday the body of a baby was found lying at one of the wharves in a tin can. Had it not been for this crowning revelation, this article perhaps would not have been written. But when it comes to canning babies, putting them up, so to speak ’for exportation,’ as though they were oysters, shrimps, cauliflowers, green turtle, or jellies, it becomes time to remonstrate. Formerly children were scarce in California. If the supply has become so large that the domestic market is overrun, and foreign exportation has become a matter of expediency, the fact is surely worthy of mention. Last evening, too, the body of a child four or five years old, and apparently as many days dead, was found on Geary street, near Hyde. But this incident of simply finding these unbound and unclaimed little volumns [sic] is too common of late to excite attention or demand remark; it is only when they are canned that the inquiring and indignant pen claims a right to scratch the public ear.—Hermetically sealed babies, carefully prepared, to keep in any clime! What a label for a can, and what a libel on humanity!

[4V50 Gary]

Armor piercing bullets. Well, back in the days of iron claded knights, breastplates were proofed by firing a lead ball at it. That it only dented and not penetrate was the proof to the buyer that it was indeed safe from bullets. The race against armor and guns continued until armor was seen as obsolete. It was briefly resurrected early in the Civil War and that probably inspired a new bullet. Armor was quickly discarded by the soldiers as cumbersome and useless (most were easily penetrated by the common minie rifle). There's an example of it at Pamplin Historic Park (near Petersburg, VA). The best example of armor plate being used may be found in George W. Peck's book, How George W. Peck Put Down the Rebellion. Read it here at: George Peck Saved by armor link

[HOUSTON] TRI-WEEKLY TELEGRAPH, July 7, 1862, p. 2, c. 1
Sometime ago we published a letter from a Mr. Standifer, of Lampasas, giving a description of a new steel-pointed bullet that had been invented, and claiming Jno. Weaver as the inventor. We are just now in receipt of a communication from Major Isaac M. Brown, of Lampasas, who assures us that the invention belongs to Mr. Alfred Freeman, and he is entitled to the name of the ball. This bullet is remarkable for its penetrating qualities. At ten paces distance it was shot through ¼ inch slab iron, the ball penetrating one inch into the wood. At fifty-five steps, one of these balls penetrated seasoned burr oak 5 ½ inches. It is believed it will pass through the steel breast plates used by the enemy without difficulty. It is a great invention. Any one can make it.

[4V50 Gary]

Safe handling of firearms. Then and now, know where your bullet is going. Be sure of the backstop.

DAILY CONSTITUTIONALIST [AUGUSTA, GA], June 21, 1864, p. 3, c. 1
To All Whom It May Concern.—The following has been sent us without the name, which we always require, but from the importance of the facts contained in the communication we give it a place in our columns without vouching for their truthfulness. We have frequently alluded to the criminal practice of shooting on the river banks, thereby endangering the lives of the people on the Carolina side, especially our neighbors of Hamburg. We respectfully invite the attention of the civil and military authorities to these violations of our municipal laws:
Mr. Editor: We were glad to see that you had again called the attention of your civil authorities to what you mildly call “careless shooting,” but to us who hear, and to some of us to feel the force of these careless bullets it is something more. It is a downright outrage, not only against us but against the heretofore well governed city of Augusta, for we have complained often, and as often been promised redress, but as yet nothing done. If the civil power is insufficient to put an end to this reckless and criminal practice, we would call upon the military to discharge their duty in the matter, for soldiers and return guards fire whole volleys and are careless where they do so. Thus far one man has been struck on the cheek with a ball, and a kitchen on the river bank has been penetrated twice, these are the facts within our own knowledge. When then, we ask shall we be able to walk our streets or on our river bank without fear. This is a question to be answered at once, as it is one of vital interest to the people of
Hamburg.

[4V50 Gary]

Our soldiers and marines in Iraq have caught several insurgents who were disguised as women. Here's an example from the South.

DAILY CONSTITUTIONALIST [AUGUSTA, GA], August 2, 1864, p. 3, c. 1
An Anti-Conscript.—An individual of the masculine gender, arrayed in apparel peculiar to feminine gender, was picked up in this city yesterday by the Police. The individual aforesaid states that he is from Scriven County, Ga., that he was formerly a member of the 63d Georgia Regiment, but being under age was discharged from the service, that he came to Augusta to see his Aunt, and fearing the Conscript officer, clothed himself in female apparel. The counterfeit was too shallow. “Them [illegible]! those voice!” as Artemus Ward has it, betrayed the youth, who says he is under 17 years of age, and he will doubtless be turned over to either Uncle Jeff’s or Cousin Joe’s Enrolling officer—the very party to avoid when the disguise was adopted.

[4V50 Gary]

It would be interesting if a corroborating account could be found in the antebellum anecdote.

DAILY CONSTITUTIONALIST [AUGUSTA, GA], August 18, 1864, p. 1, c. 2
A Female Mallady [sic].—A re-union with an old friend with whom we campaigned several years ago, has brought to mind many pleasant memories. One of the most laughable and ridiculous was one that occurred to Maj. John L. Morgan, Quartermaster in this city. At Fort -----, where he was stationed, Indians visited constantly and in large numbers, making the place a familiar rendezvous. One evening the Major received from the Post office Department a large supply of Uncle Sam’s postage stamps, which he placed in a box in his quarters. These Indians were in the habit of going where they pleased, and appropriating anything that took their fancy. That evening, whilst the Major was absent on the parade ground, an Indian squaw, in prowling about the quarters, discovered the postage stamps. These creatures were not very luxurious or fastidious in their habits of dress, yet they would wear all the finery they could pile on. This squaw especially, whether because of poverty or choice, seldom wore any article of dress except a few brass finger and earrings.
In a few minutes she appeared on the parade ground with her naked body completely covered with United States postage stamps, admiring herself with much gusto. Screams of laughter greeted her appearance. The Major rushed to his quarters and discovered his loss, but he consoled himself by proposing that if she wished to be mailed, she should go through, as she was pre-paid to her full weight.—Atlanta Intel.

[4V50 Gary]

Now we have medical testimony to ban the side saddle.

NASHVILLE DAILY UNION, September 23, 1862, p. 1, c. 7

How Shall Ladies Ride?

In view of the increase of equestrian exercise among our ladies this becomes an important question. Dr. James C. Jackson, in his recent work on Consumption, contends that there are insuperable objections to the usual style of side-saddle riding. The position enforced by it, he argues, is injurious to the system, having a tendency to produce crooked spines, irritation of the spine, congestion of the lungs, and of the liver and kidneys. This is a formidable list of diseases, but it by no means, according to Dr. Johnson [scratch in film] the evils consequent on the usual style of riding. Truth to say, a lady's position on horseback can not be called a natural one—but what would you have? You wouldn't have a woman ride astride, would you? "Yes, I would," says the Doctor, and then goes on to show, by actual instances, that ladies [scratch in film] to ride at all in the present manner, owing to its hurting them so much, have become strong and well by riding as men ride. Mexican women ride astride, and the Doctor recommends that we adopt their "barbarism" in this respect. It only requires a pair of pantaloons, which, after all, many of the ladies have no insuperable objection to putting on! The Doctor confidently reckons on the coming of the time when men will see "what an outrageous abomination the present style of riding for women is, and it will pass into desuetude, and be reckoned among the follies of a previous day." So you see what you are coming to, ladies!

[4V50 Gary]

Buck and his turkeys.

NASHVILLE DAILY UNION, November 1, 1862, p. 3, c. 1

Capture of Turkey.

A military operation, involving a large amount of strategy, was reported to us the other day, which deserves at least an humble place in the history of this war. It seems that Buck, the well known porter at the Capitol, combining a desire for speculation, with a taste for ornithology, had invested divers and sundry dimes and quarters, which he had accumulated, in the purchase of several specimens of the popular domestic fowl known as the American Turkey, intending, doubtless, to reap a handsome per centage on their original cost, when their bodies should reach the proper degree of corpulency, and the blockade should render the purchase of even a turkey-buzzard, let along a simon-pure turkey; an impossibility. The plan and conception, so far as we are able to judge, were good, were faultless. We do not care indeed, as newspaper correspondents say, we do not feel authorized, to state the precise number of the turkeys purchased, but, we are not violating any confidence reposed in us, as the same wise men would say, in stating that at least an approximation to the true number may be attained by thrice counting the digits of one hand. Alas! for the uncertainty of all human speculation; the turkeys suddenly vanished. Their owner went one morning full of hope to feed his biped flock, and like Joseph and Simeon "they were not." who can blame Buck for uttering several words not to be found in the celebrated Theological Dictionary, published under his name! His fowls had been foully dealt with. His suspicions were directed immediately to a squad of soldiers quartered in a neighboring house, for he knew how fond college boys and soldiers are of turkeys; and obtaining the proper authority, he immediately instituted a search. The soldiers manifested a most laudable interest in assisting Buck, unlocking clothes-presses, trunks and valises; opening bureaus, looking into quart bottles, and under carpets, and, in fact, in every place where the abducted individuals would be most likely to be—not found. Buck wanted to go up into the loft, through a trap-door which he by chance espied. His military friends remonstrated; they assured him they were not there; that nobody but citizens of the United States could go up there; that turkeys were not citizens of the United States, and, of course, were not up there; and that, finally, by the Dred Scott decision, Buck was not a citizen, any more than the turkeys, and of course he couldn't go up. Besides, who ever heard or read, in ancient or modern history, of turkeys being cooped up in a garret? "Think of that, Master buck!" Buck insisted; they remonstrated; he fumed, they roared, until finally he vowed to summon the war department to the spot, and then they yielded. Buck jumped up on a table, and pushed up the trap-door, when mirabile dictu, two of his biggest turkeys, who had bee put out as pickets, peeped down in his face, and demanded the countersign! He gave it, and they "gobbled him up;" that is, they invited him to come up and reclaim his prisoners. He did so, although we grieve to say, that, close confinement, bad diet, military voracity, and sundry sales, had reduced their number to only five.

[4V50 Gary]

If you haven't been to Frederick, Maryland, then you've missed the Museum of Civil War Medicine. It's worth a visit and they've got a t-shirt that advertises embalming services. Anyhow, while perusing the papers, I found this.

NASHVILLE DAILY UNION, January 12, 1863, p. 1, c. 3

Embalming the Dead—A Process Practicable to All.

The modern processes by which the bodies of officers and soldiers of the army have been embalmed and restored to their friends is not the least of the blessings which science has bestowed upon the world since the beginning of the war. The expense of this process, in most cases, places its advantages beyond the reach of people of moderate means. Those who have adopted the business as a profession, are in some cases, extortionous in their charges, particularly where officers are the subjects; and the whole matter is surrounded by professional secrecy impenetrable to persons of unscientific tastes.
A matter of so great general utility and importance should not be monopolized or turned wholly to individual emolument. It may not be out of place to give, in this connection, a simple recipe by which any physician or surgeon of ordinary capacity can embalm the dead, and preserve them from decomposition or putrefaction for a length of time to answer all practical requirements. The following was handed to me shortly after the battle of Antietam, by the Medical Director of the Ninth Army Corps:
The liquid chloride of zinc injected into the cerebral or femoral artery, will preserve bodies from decomposition or putrefaction for a great length of time.
The mode of obtaining this liquid is to take (say) one quart of hydrochloric acid to an earthen vessel, and add small pieces of zinc until reaction ceases.
The liquid may be diluted in the proportion of one part to four of water. From one quart to three pints of this dilution chloride of zinc will be sufficient to effect the purpose desired.
H. W. Rivers,
Surgeon of Volunteers, and Medical Director
Ninth Army Corps.

[4V50 Gary]

July 3, Gettsyburg. George Meade was the commanding officer of the Union's Army of the Potomac. They were engaged in a desperate battle against Robert E. Lee's seemingly invincible Army of Northern Virginia. Battery H was on Cemetery Hill when Meade happened to visit. Private Parmelee recalled it.

Gen. Meade, attended by only one officer, appeared among our guns, on foot, saying to our officers that this point must be held at all hazards. When the cry went round that the ammunition was getting short, Gen. Meade picked up a shell, stepped up to a gun, asking if it could not be used." Just then William H. Styer, a beardless 19-year old corporal from Marietta serving as No. 6 with Gun Detachment C, rushed forward with several projectiles. "Seeing someone in his way," Parmelee continued, "he grabbed him by the arm, saying, 'Out of the way, you old fool,' and clapped a shot into the gun. Gen. Meade retired in good order, smiling, we supposed, at the boy's earnestness. Accidents of battle gave him an Irish promotion to 'powder monkey' when this occurred. When told [later] how he had treated the commanding General he could not believe it." Steyr finished the war as the battery's first sergeant.

[4V50 Gary]

I've no fondness for Dugout Doug who fired on the Bonus Marchers in Washington. However, I do give him credit where due.

Many of the escapes didn't actually make their breaks from the island but instead waited until assignment to work details at other posts; getaways were much easier from the mainland. the year 1877 was especially notable, when no fewer than nine prisoners escaped from work assignments at Point San Jose.
A young officer recalled one such escape attempt in his memoirs. Recently graduated from the Military Academy, the new lieutenant was spending a summer-long furlough with his family in San Francisco. "A prisoner engaged in work at Fort Mason, where we lived, had escaped. He was a burly fellow armed with a scythe, and great consternation reigned in the post... It was none of my business, but I had tracked trails too often with the Apaches not to pick up this one. His hiding place was easy to locate, and I had him covered before he had a chance to make a move. When I turned him over to the guard, he just spat at me and snarled, 'You damn West Pointers!'" - 2nd Lt. Douglas MacArthur, Class of '03.

The island mentioned is Alcatraz. Most folks don't know that Alcatraz was a military fort from the Civil War up until 1934. It served only 29 years as a federal prison and closed in 1963. However, most people remember "The Rock" as a prison where Al Capone or Robert Stroud (The Birdman of Alcatraz) were housed.

[4V50 Gary]

from a regular army officer who was sent to Missouri early in the Civil War.

The Kansas Volunteers were a peculiar organization; brimful of patriotism and inured to hard service, and a rough life, they were utterly lacking in discipline and in many respects difficult to manage. The officers except in the higher grades were of the same class as the men, and all hands seemed to regard the expedition in the light of a foray on their ancient enemy-the State of Missouri. For more than six years continual hostilities had been breaking out between the free state men in Kansas and the pro-slavery element in Missouri,-or as they were generally called, the jay-hawkers and the border-ruffians. Between the two I fancy there was alittle to choose in point of vindictiveness. Each had bitter wrongs to avenge and neither was slow in visiting condign punishment on the other's territory. Now that we were regularly encamped in Missouri, with an apparently irrestible force, the Kansas men seemed to think they had a perfect right to treat the inhabitants as conquered enemies, and levy on their property indiscriminately. If this had been allowed to go on, a perfect reign of terror would shortly have existed in the State and neither age nor sex would have been safe for a moment. The regular troops would have soon become demoralized by the example of their comrades, and the condition of Missouri would shortly have equalled that of France in the days of the Free Companies.

The passage was written by Lt. George B. Sanford (who retired as a colonel) and may be found on page 125 of the book, Fighting Rebels and Redskins, edited by E. R. Hagemann.

[4V50 Gary]

I was a bit shocked to learn that it was used. I knew about buck 'n gag, barrel shirts, riding the horse, being tied to the wheel, standing on the platform, standing on the chimes, being tied up by the thumbs, carrying the rail, sweat box, being shaved and drummed out of camp (Rogue's March), hanging, firing squad, but lashing? Here's what I found on page 126 of Fighting Rebels and Redskins:

"Two men of the Volunteers had been tried by Court Martial for robbing a house, and were sentenced to a certain number of lashes on the bare back in the presence of the whole command. We were drawn up in a hollow square, the criminals were brought to the centre, and the sentence of the Court read to them. Then they were tied up to the spare wheel of a caisson and the lashes vigorously administered by the drummers, the military surgeon standing by."