Wife's near draw experience

[Skadoosh]

What I'm pointing out to the new "gentleman" on the forum is that there isn't much to report.

Suspicious activity such as the OP described is of interest to LE and definitely worth reporting.

[MLeake]

My cousin once was "browbeaten" by her husband into calling the police about a strange guy who had shown up at their rural home, driving a floral delivery van, and claiming to be lost. He wanted to use her phone to call the customer for directions; this was pre-cell phone days.

She was going to let him in, when her German Shepherd reacted very unfavorably to the guy. The guy chose to leave. My cousin called her husband, who said "Call the police right now."

She did, although she thought they wouldn't be interested.

A while later, several police cars showed up. Turned out that a guy claiming to be a lost floral delivery driver, with a van, had raped four or five women who had let them inside to use the phones in their rural homes.

So Moosehead24, although he could be less blunt and antagonistic, makes a very good point.

[Polynikes]

Moosehead, let me be equally blunt, and I'm sure this response is going to offend the sensibilities of some here. I'm not looking to derail this thread with an argument. When I make a decision to carry a weapon, it's not because I see myself as a protector of the citizenry as a whole. It's to protect me and mine. Simply because I have shouldered that responsibility, I'm not volunteering to protect everyone else that comes my way. They have to decide for themselves what their own safety and security is worth. Selfish? Maybe, but I don't buy into the whole "sheepdog" mentality. My family is the only flock I worry about.

Would I report it? Sure. I'd want the scum off the street just so I never have to run into them again. The decision is not mine to make, it belongs to my wife, but no matter what she decides, that's the end of the incident as far as she is concerned. If someone else becomes a victim, it's the fault of the criminal alone.

[WANT A LCR 22LR]

" Would I report it? Sure. I'd want the scum off the street just so I never have to run into them again. The decision is not mine to make, it belongs to my wife, but no matter what she decides, that's the end of the incident as far as she is concerned. If someone else becomes a victim, it's the fault of the criminal alone. "

Not reporting is wrong.

By reporting, it establishes a pattern of the BG and if enough bits of information are provided by different people a future crime might be stopped. Or even her being in a different car and the BG unknowingly taking a run at her a second time.

TV news reports run stories where people have reported a attempted crime to police. The news reports are was to let people to be on the look out. It also gets information out there about the BG, sometimes this leads to someone turning them in.

I'm thinking there is some other reason why she does not want to report the incident. Perhaps it didn't go down as described, or she knew the people and fears reprisal, or acted more aggressively. Some sort of "code" not to snitch on someone coming a crime? Or?

You are really not in a position to objectively view the overall picture because you are too close to the situation.

If she still does not report the incident, I would hope she tells the next victim face to face that the same BG approached her but felt it unnecessary to report it.

[Skadoosh]

polynikes wrote:

If someone else becomes a victim, it's the fault of the criminal alone.

WANT A LCR 22LR replied:

If she still does not report the incident, I would hope she tells the next victim face to face that the same BG approached her but felt it unnecessary to report it.

Well said, WANT A LCR 22. Pretty had to argue against that.

[Polynikes]

If she still does not report the incident, I would hope she tells the next victim face to face that the same BG approached her but felt it unnecessary to report it.

The only person to blame for a crime is the person who perpetrated it. Sorry, I'm not buying any explanantions to the contrary.

[threegun]

His wife bears less blame than the new victim who decided NOT to be able to protect themselves.

[MLeake]

Polynikes, you can deny any moral obligation to your community if you like, but please bear in mind that is exactly what you are doing. Leaving others to fall victim, when you might be able to help prevent it, is not a trait I can respect, and would be a trait that would cause me to de-select somebody as a friend.

Bottom line: Your wife could, through a phone call and an interview, provide your local LEOs with information that could be used to prevent a crime by this same pair, or make it easier to identify them should something else happen. Her choice not to try to do so does not paint a flattering picture, and while you are trying to be the supportive husband - which is admirable - you pretending that it's a decision that involves her and her alone is not admirable in the least.

Edit: Had you said your wife was so traumatized by the event that she couldn't talk about it (often the case with rape victims, for instance), that might be different. You've basically said she doesn't want the hassle, and thinks the police wouldn't do anything with the information. That's just sad.

[WANT A LCR 22LR]

"The only person to blame for a crime is the person who perpetrated it. Sorry, I'm not buying any explanantions to the contrary."

Oh, I'm not laying blame, . . .I just want her to tell the next victim " I could have called the police and possibly saved you from harm, but my husband agreed that once I returned to my safe and warm house, I bore no responsibility to warn others and can't be convinced to the contrary. "

I guess if I suggested you call the police , relayed the BG interaction then ask if you should report the incident, that would be too obvious. . .

Is there a person that you or wife have the highest respect for? What is their take on this situation?

[skoro]

Kudos to your wife for being alert and reacting calmly but deliberately.

[NWPilgrim]

Moral obligation to the community?!

The fact that well experienced thugs are running around the community pretty much puts the lie to that statement. The community failed Mrs. Polynikes a long time ago by letting these thugs get away to rob again.

Perhaps if you live in a community where police actually care about crimes that do not involve physical injury that might hold water. Or where violent thugs actually were sent away to jail for a looooong time.

I live in a fairly good town but when I have called the cops for a couple of incidents of encounters that did not quite result in personal injury or property damage the police have literally said they are too busy to respond to non-injury calls and hung up. Neither time did they invite me to file a report before hanging up. And our police dept is pretty well funded. They have no shortage of personnel, cars, bicycles, Segways, SWAT or tactical gear from my observation.

Personally I would try to report it just in the off chance someone at the police dept gave a rip about a non-injury offense. But if someone else chooses not to and I was attacked by that same person, I would not blame the previous victim. I would blame the courts, DA office and police for why a well experienced mugger/rapist/kidnapper (who knows) is running around loose. He probably has been arrested several times before. I doubt he is clean on arrests.

Good awareness and reaction by Mrs. Polynikes. Her reaction is probably going to do more to make these scum bags think twice than having a report sit in the file cabinet at police HQ.

[Polynikes]

Polynikes, you can deny any moral obligation to your community if you like, but please bear in mind that is exactly what you are doing. Leaving others to fall victim, when you might be able to help prevent it, is not a trait I can respect, and would be a trait that would cause me to de-select somebody as a friend.

Oddly, I don't ever recall asking for respect or begging for friends when I joined this forum, so forgive me if your comments ring a bit hollow. My stance is quite simple. I'm not inclined to put my life on the line for Joe Schmuck, who decides not to look after his own safety, when doing so means that my wife and kids may not have a father coming home to them. If that means that I'm sacrificing my community for the sake of my family, I'm very OK with that.

Bottom line: Your wife could, through a phone call and an interview, provide your local LEOs with information that could be used to prevent a crime by this same pair, or make it easier to identify them should something else happen. Her choice not to try to do so does not paint a flattering picture, and while you are trying to be the supportive husband - which is admirable - you pretending that it's a decision that involves her and her alone is not admirable in the least.

Again, failing to win the admiration of strangers on the internet doesn't particularly cause me to lose sleep at night.

Edit: Had you said your wife was so traumatized by the event that she couldn't talk about it (often the case with rape victims, for instance), that might be different. You've basically said she doesn't want the hassle, and thinks the police wouldn't do anything with the information. That's just sad.

Actually, according to her, a large part of her hesitation stems from her not wanting to disclose to the police and have it recorded that she owns and carries a firearm, for fear of later harassment.

Oh, I'm not laying blame, . . .I just want her to tell the next victim " I could have called the police and possibly saved you from harm, but my husband agreed that once I returned to my safe and warm house, I bore no responsibility to warn others and can't be convinced to the contrary. "

I think perhaps you're attributing to me something I never said, either in this thread, or directly in conversation with Mrs. Polynikes. In fact, I'd like to see you quote where I said I'd advise not filing a police report, because everything I have posted has been to the contrary.

I guess if I suggested you call the police , relayed the BG interaction then ask if you should report the incident, that would be too obvious. . .

...and the extent of what I know of the incident is what I've typed here in the thread, so it's not exactly detailed. This is beside the fact, however, since she does not wish to file the report. What I've said to her has not changed her mind up to this point, and frankly, that's her prerogative. If there are other ramifications to not making an official report of the incident, she will apparently have deal with those at a later time.

It doesn't change that fact that I'm still very proud of her for the way that she handled the situation, even if it did leave her shaking and crying when the adrenaline wore off. She's come a long way from the woman who was afraid to have a 12 gauge bird gun unloaded in our house a little over two years ago.

[MLeake]

There is a huge difference between putting yourself at risk on behalf of people you don't know, although there are those of us in the forum who have done that, and filing a simple report.

Your wife fears future harassment by LE?

That is a new one.

So, she is willing to stand up for her kids and herself. You are willing to stand up for her. And that is as far as you go.

Congratulations.

[Moosehead24]

I guess this all begs the question, if a actual crime was commited, would she of then (would you) call the police?

[Polynikes]

Your wife fears future harassment by LE?

That is a new one.

Apparently, the media and the local police scanners are in disagreement with you. Law abiding gun owners being subjected to police harassment is nothing new. /shrug

I guess this all begs the question, if a actual crime was commited, would she of then (would you) call the police?

The purpose of this thread is not to beg the hypothetical. Sorry. I posted it because I was particularly proud of the SA that Mama Polynikes demonstrated, and I don't think it's that often enough that we hear about a female involved in a potential SD incident here in Tactics.

[MLeake]

Assuming your wife was carrying legally, and you are not in a Constitutional Carry state, she is already in the database.

If you are in a Constitutional Carry state, harassment is unlikely.

If she was not carrying legally, that is a different issue.

Tactical awareness is well and good, but our country was founded on a basis of civic responsibility. Every time a citizen lets this type of event (which may have been targeted on the SUV, your wife's purse, your wife herself, or your kids) go unreported, we as a society slip farther backward.

If your wife had actually been attacked, one would hope any witnesses would have been more civic minded.

[Vermonter]

In my mind that is the fact that your better half came home safe. Good for her and good for you and your support. I do however have a suggestion. Has she thought about filing an anymous report?

[Moosehead24]

Also, not that often we hear someone fail to call LE when they witness a possible crime...at least not from someone not living in a situation where they can expect retaliation. Look man, I'm not trying to be jerk...but if thats how I am coming accross, so be it. You and your wife had an opportunity to do something to "possibley" help others. We will never know. But instead you decided to come on hear and share your story with all of us, which I appreciate...I just dont see why "you" instead of posting here you picked up the phone and called istead of your wife. I respect the idea of protecting the mama...so it would be so simple for you to do what she was too scared to do. I'm glad I live in a neighborhood where we look out for one another. If I see something out of place, I will call the LE on my neighbors behalf and they will do the same. Its a sad world when I look out my window, see something going on to my neighbor and not make an attempt to call LE. I just dont get it.

[Ringolevio]

Many of you here are too young to remember this. But for people "of a certain age", there are two words that call up an occurrence that is the epitome of the consequences of folks "not wanting to get involved".

Kitty Genovese.

[Look it up. Hint: THIRTY-EIGHT witnesses did NOTHING]

[NWPilgrim]

Kitty Genovese.

[Look it up. Hint: THIRTY-EIGHT witnesses did NOTHING]

Which was an actual crime. Somebody acting strange in the parking lot at WalMart but not committing ANY crime, is hardly the moral equivalent of watching someone being stabbed to death and not saying anything when a policeman questions you.

Mrs Polynikes:
- Did not observe a crime of any sort: no crime, no stab wounds, no nothing except her intuition/caution
- Was not contacted by police for a statement
- Was alert, cautious and prevented anything happening by subtle positioning

Now that all the armchair moralists have chimed in, where are the guys always chiming in that she is paranoid, over reacted, could have killed someone for putting her hand on her gun, is lucky the other party is not suing her, how dare she go armed without weekly tactics classes?

You done good Mrs Polynikes, and perhaps better than most of your high handed critics might have done (in the real world not the Interwebz).

[Polynikes]

Assuming your wife was carrying legally, and you are not in a Constitutional Carry state, she is already in the database.

You are, in fact, wrong. The gun is legally carried and Mrs. Polynikes does have a concealed carry permit, however, in Colorado (where this occurred) it was recently ruled that there can be no record kept of who permits have been issued to, and any records that were kept prior to the ruling must be purged. The only proof a law abiding citizen has here that they can legally carry a concealed weapon is the permit in their pocket.

Mrs. Polynikes also happens to listen to the local police frequencies regularly, and occasionally will hear officers responding on MWAG calls. There was a recent call where the officers on route were being informed by dispatch of the various models and calibers of guns the specific person was known to carry before even arriving on scene(though they were not apparently breaking any law according to the call.) Therefore, it would appear that only through interaction with people here are the police keeping track of who has what firearms. Call me paranoid, but the only people that have any business knowing that I carry and what I carry are the ones I choose to inform.

[Moosehead24]

Something is being missed here that we dont know. It just doesnt make sence for a person to not call LE in this situation. It is starting to sound like we should only call LE if an actual crime is prevented...instead of being proactive and calling 911 just to give them a heads up?? again, why not. It's a two minute phone call. What do you really have to loose?????

[Capt. Charlie]

lets focus on the imporntant thing

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In my mind that is the fact that your better half came home safe. Good for her and good for you and your support. I do however have a suggestion. Has she thought about filing an anymous report?

Vermonter nailed it. Look guys, this went from praising the gentleman's wife to a heated debate on whether or not it should've been reported, thanks to a single post by a new member.

Said new member may not have figured out yet that we express things here at TFL a little more politely, but he does make a point.

As for me, being retired LE, I'll keep quiet since I'm bound to be a bit biased . Each man (or woman) must answer to his own conscience.

Since this went way off topic and seems to be getting a bit ugly, I think it's time to end this one.

Closed.