You've just learned a hit man is coming to get you. Now what?

jjericho · May 27, 2005, 04:03 PM

How about this for a scenario:

You're ex-wife believes -- mistakenly -- that you forgot to rewrite your Will, and she is still heir to your priceless Hummel collection worth millions. With evil in her greedy heart, she has hired a hit man to take you out. You don't know where or when Guido is coming. He's already been paid. And he sleeps better at night knowing he doesn't owe anyone anything.

What will you do differently, if anything? Will you carry different weapons? Change your daily schedule? Set a trap? Move? (This is a firearm forum so I'm mostly interested in your weapon of choice, not your airline or favorite remote island.)

just one question · May 27, 2005, 04:06 PM

I dont think many of us have a price on our head here

But if it happened I would go to the police and get the best arsenal i can possibly get my hands on.

it would consist of

glock 34
beretta 92
some sort of 1911
4.10 derringer
remington 870
bush master ar15
ak47
and more

Capt. Charlie · May 27, 2005, 04:11 PM

Just for [color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color]s and giggles, I'll play along with this one. If a hit man knows what he's doing, get right with the Lord and get your affairs in order. There isn't a damned thing you can do about it, unless you get really, really lucky. You'll never see your killer nor hear the shot that killed you.

Crowbar · May 27, 2005, 04:14 PM

Well, the first thing I'd do is sell my woman to the Hells Angels or the Outlaws M.C. for a bottle of whiskey, and then I'd go to my favorite airline and book a flight to my favorite remote island and have a party celebrating the ridance of that backstabbing woman.

racinstylez · May 27, 2005, 04:18 PM

If i was worth that much money that my wife would have me killed I would just disapper. You have that much money where you can just move somewhere and become a brand new person. I think thats the best, because a good hitman will get you and there is probably nuttin you can do about that.

Bert223 · May 27, 2005, 04:32 PM

If I had that much money, I'd move to the remote wilderness, say alaska and live in a log cabin and just wait for the guy to try and find me. Call the police and tell them the whole thing then call the FBI. Then, because I was difficult to find, the police could do their work and I would be safe. As far as arsenal goes:

44 mag revolver 4" barrel on me at ALL times
.357 smith ultralite on me at ALL times
Kabar and double edged knife on me at ALL times.
12 gauge shotguns in every room in the house
3 SKS's
.308 long range rifle 6-24 scope.
various knives hidden thoughout the house

but the chances are the hitman would probably get you when your guard is down so all the firearms in the world wouldn't help you.

Relayer · May 27, 2005, 04:39 PM

I keep deeply in debt (and no life insurance) to make just such a situation unlikley.

Try to get the police to break the wife (give up the hitman), or hope that since he's paid, he loses interest in completing the task. Maybe you can offer him double what she's paying to turn the tables on her.

But, if someone, be it your next door neighbor or your brother-in-law, want badly enough to kill you, they'll likely get you.

TwoGuns · May 27, 2005, 04:59 PM

I'd rig a nice brick of Comp B to go off a minute or two after my heart stopped beating. With any luck, I'd get the bastard.

PythonGuy · May 27, 2005, 04:59 PM

Guido huh, you are watching too many Soprano's episodes and really need to get out more.

Ben Swenson · May 27, 2005, 04:59 PM

"Hello, is this the Starving Actors Talent Agency? I need to hire someone to do some method acting for ... oh ... as long as the show takes. I need a male, six feet tall, about 170 pounds, shortish brown hair. A goatee is a plus. Yes, I'll hold.

...

Hmm ... okay, and he's aware that he'll pretty much have to play the part all day long, right? Sounds great! Thanks, you're a lifesaver!"

I'd probably call the police and give them my story, buy some good body armor and spend a lot of time with close friends who are aware of the situation and extremely well armed.

And then I'd hope that she didn't spend much on the hitman.

As for specifics on the weapons, I'd stick with 1911s, but I'd probably carry a couple of them. As well, I'd keep a P3AT in the pocket and plenty of extra magazines. I'd try to make sure I had a truck or SUV with 4wd and I'd keep a shotgun with slugs and an AR-15 with a pile of magazines in there.

locked'n'cocked · May 27, 2005, 05:08 PM

nothin, your probably pretty screwed if the guy is any good. Why did you even think to put this up? are you that paranoid or just lookin for something to talk about?

918sgt · May 27, 2005, 05:08 PM

Kill yourself and save him the trouble. What kind of idiot comes up with this stuff?

Mannlicher · May 27, 2005, 05:19 PM

this is just too simple. I would hire my OWN hitman. With the proceeds from selling just a small part of my Hummel collection, I would have the ex whacked, and her hitman too.

CajunBass · May 27, 2005, 05:31 PM

I'd just wake up and say "I gotta stop dreaming this kind of stuff", then go back to sleep.

dev_null · May 27, 2005, 05:44 PM

Are you sure it wasn't a zombie dinosaur hitman?

Jseime · May 27, 2005, 05:47 PM

What?? When did i get money???!!!

oh jeez i need an M4 and a 20 inch heavy barreled AR-15 with a leupold scope on it.
then a sawed off double barrel shotty and a desert eagle

did i mention im broke

novus collectus · May 27, 2005, 05:57 PM

Personally, I would not worry about the type of gun. I would move to a state that let me defend myself with one though

.

I would also buy and wear a kevlar toupee for those "from behind" shots he might surprise me with.

(hhmmmm....a kevlar, mullet-cutt wig. I'm getting a patent.)

RsqVet · May 27, 2005, 06:56 PM

UGH --- This can't be serious can it? I'm sorry but if we are going to spend time, energy and bandwidth can we at liest discuss things that are SOMEWHAT relevent to self defense / home defense / CCW / IDPA or something? This is not, it's a movie or novel plot.

unclestu · May 27, 2005, 07:09 PM

Too much TV. *Way* too much TV.

TwoGuns · May 27, 2005, 07:17 PM

Some people just can't have a little fun. Lighten up guys.

Duxman · May 27, 2005, 07:29 PM

OK. I will play along - for fun.

First obviously since you found out he was coming to get you: He is not a very good hitman. The best of the best - you would never see them coming: You would just be dead.

Information is key. If you can find out what kind of hitman (obviously if you have that much money - you have contacts) - you find out who the hitman is, and set a trap.

Hire ex-SAS, and SEALS to ambush the hitman, while hiring even more DELTA and SPETNATZ commandos to take out the ex-wife.

When you have money - why do the dirty work yourself?

Meanwhile disapear - he cant kill what he cant find. New country, new identity. Cash transactions only. Plastic survey to boot. New fingerprints.

New life - find the next ExMs Smith...start all over again.

Lawyer Daggit · May 27, 2005, 07:50 PM

First thing- make it very public that you have changed your will! also make it public that you know a hit man has been hired and why.

I agree with earlier posts- if the hit man is good you are screwed.

If I knew who it was I would consider trying to do something about organising someone to hunt the hunter and quietly slip out of town without letting anyone know where I was going.

**tyme** · May 27, 2005, 08:07 PM

Head for the nearest school or other gun-free zone. The hitman will have to leave his guns outside, and you can have a good ol' hollywood brawl.

just one question · May 27, 2005, 08:29 PM

tyme if he is gonna kill you... he already has no respect for the law how is a sign
goin to stop him

JRLaws · May 27, 2005, 08:44 PM

Stay away from cans.
Hitmen hate cans.
Join the carnival.
As any madman/hitman will tell you, the lot is posted "Carnival personnel only".
Hey, the hitman is not carnival personnel.
Enjoy your new job as a weight guesser.
Problem solved.

and people say I'm a Jerk.

May 27, 2005, 04:03 PM	#1
jjericho Junior Member Join Date: January 4, 2005 Posts: 11	You've just learned a hit man is coming to get you. Now what? How about this for a scenario: You're ex-wife believes -- mistakenly -- that you forgot to rewrite your Will, and she is still heir to your priceless Hummel collection worth millions. With evil in her greedy heart, she has hired a hit man to take you out. You don't know where or when Guido is coming. He's already been paid. And he sleeps better at night knowing he doesn't owe anyone anything. What will you do differently, if anything? Will you carry different weapons? Change your daily schedule? Set a trap? Move? (This is a firearm forum so I'm mostly interested in your weapon of choice, not your airline or favorite remote island.)

May 27, 2005, 04:06 PM	#2
just one question Senior Member Join Date: April 5, 2005 Posts: 213	huh I dont think many of us have a price on our head here But if it happened I would go to the police and get the best arsenal i can possibly get my hands on. it would consist of glock 34 beretta 92 some sort of 1911 4.10 derringer remington 870 bush master ar15 ak47 and more

May 27, 2005, 04:11 PM	#3
Capt. Charlie Moderator Emeritus Join Date: March 24, 2005 Location: Steubenville, OH Posts: 4,446	Just for [color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color][color=#FF0000]█[/color]s and giggles, I'll play along with this one. If a hit man knows what he's doing, get right with the Lord and get your affairs in order. There isn't a damned thing you can do about it, unless you get really, really lucky. You'll never see your killer nor hear the shot that killed you. __________________ TFL Members are ambassadors to the world for firearm owners. What kind of ambassador does *your* post make *you?* I train in earnest, to do the things that I pray in earnest, I'll never have to do. --Capt. Charlie

May 27, 2005, 04:14 PM	#4
Crowbar Member Join Date: May 26, 2005 Posts: 24	Well, the first thing I'd do is sell my woman to the Hells Angels or the Outlaws M.C. for a bottle of whiskey, and then I'd go to my favorite airline and book a flight to my favorite remote island and have a party celebrating the ridance of that backstabbing woman. __________________ Most people who claim that their bullet failed, recovered that bullet from a dead animal. Sure doesn't sound like too much of a failure to me.

May 27, 2005, 04:59 PM	#8
TwoGuns Senior Member Join Date: February 4, 2000 Location: Sierra Madre, CA Posts: 173	I'd rig a nice brick of Comp B to go off a minute or two after my heart stopped beating. With any luck, I'd get the bastard. __________________ I'll need guns.......lots of guns.

May 27, 2005, 04:18 PM	#5
racinstylez Senior Member Join Date: May 23, 2005 Posts: 240	If i was worth that much money that my wife would have me killed I would just disapper. You have that much money where you can just move somewhere and become a brand new person. I think thats the best, because a good hitman will get you and there is probably nuttin you can do about that.

May 27, 2005, 04:32 PM	#6
Bert223 Member Join Date: May 23, 2005 Posts: 77	If I had that much money, I'd move to the remote wilderness, say alaska and live in a log cabin and just wait for the guy to try and find me. Call the police and tell them the whole thing then call the FBI. Then, because I was difficult to find, the police could do their work and I would be safe. As far as arsenal goes: 44 mag revolver 4" barrel on me at ALL times .357 smith ultralite on me at ALL times Kabar and double edged knife on me at ALL times. 12 gauge shotguns in every room in the house 3 SKS's .308 long range rifle 6-24 scope. various knives hidden thoughout the house but the chances are the hitman would probably get you when your guard is down so all the firearms in the world wouldn't help you.

May 27, 2005, 04:39 PM	#7
Relayer Senior Member Join Date: January 21, 2005 Posts: 101	I keep deeply in debt (and no life insurance) to make just such a situation unlikley. Try to get the police to break the wife (give up the hitman), or hope that since he's paid, he loses interest in completing the task. Maybe you can offer him double what she's paying to turn the tables on her. But, if someone, be it your next door neighbor or your brother-in-law, want badly enough to kill you, they'll likely get you.

May 27, 2005, 04:59 PM	#9
PythonGuy Junior member Join Date: November 4, 2004 Location: Long Island, NY Posts: 456	Guido huh, you are watching too many Soprano's episodes and really need to get out more.

May 27, 2005, 04:59 PM	#10
Ben Swenson Senior Member Join Date: May 17, 2000 Posts: 1,210	"Hello, is this the Starving Actors Talent Agency? I need to hire someone to do some method acting for ... oh ... as long as the show takes. I need a male, six feet tall, about 170 pounds, shortish brown hair. A goatee is a plus. Yes, I'll hold. ... Hmm ... okay, and he's aware that he'll pretty much have to play the part all day long, right? Sounds great! Thanks, you're a lifesaver!" I'd probably call the police and give them my story, buy some good body armor and spend a lot of time with close friends who are aware of the situation and extremely well armed. And then I'd hope that she didn't spend much on the hitman. As for specifics on the weapons, I'd stick with 1911s, but I'd probably carry a couple of them. As well, I'd keep a P3AT in the pocket and plenty of extra magazines. I'd try to make sure I had a truck or SUV with 4wd and I'd keep a shotgun with slugs and an AR-15 with a pile of magazines in there.

May 27, 2005, 05:08 PM	#11
locked'n'cocked Senior Member Join Date: May 8, 2005 Location: MN, USof A Posts: 214	nothin, your probably pretty screwed if the guy is any good. Why did you even think to put this up? are you that paranoid or just lookin for something to talk about? __________________ locked 'n' cocked "Make haste, slowly." Wyatt Earp Last edited by locked'n'cocked; May 27, 2005 at 07:09 PM.

May 27, 2005, 05:08 PM	#12
918sgt Member Join Date: September 21, 2004 Location: Sun City, AZ Posts: 52	Hit man Kill yourself and save him the trouble. What kind of idiot comes up with this stuff? __________________ 918sgt

May 27, 2005, 05:19 PM	#13
Mannlicher Senior Member Join Date: July 8, 2001 Location: North Central Florida & Miami Posts: 3,209	this is just too simple. I would hire my OWN hitman. With the proceeds from selling just a small part of my Hummel collection, I would have the ex whacked, and her hitman too. __________________ Nemo Me Impune Lacesset "The trouble with our liberal friends is not that they're ignorant; it's just that they know so much that isn't so.".........Ronald Reagan

May 27, 2005, 05:31 PM	#14
CajunBass Senior Member Join Date: May 6, 2005 Location: North Chesterfield, Virginia Posts: 4,767	Hit man I'd just wake up and say "I gotta stop dreaming this kind of stuff", then go back to sleep. __________________ For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16 (NKJV)

May 27, 2005, 05:44 PM	#15
dev_null Senior Member Join Date: June 23, 2002 Location: Austin TX Posts: 615	Are you sure it wasn't a zombie dinosaur hitman? __________________ The plural of anecdote is NOT "data."

May 27, 2005, 05:47 PM	#16
Jseime Senior Member Join Date: December 31, 2004 Location: Canada Posts: 1,775	What?? When did i get money???!!! oh jeez i need an M4 and a 20 inch heavy barreled AR-15 with a leupold scope on it. then a sawed off double barrel shotty and a desert eagle did i mention im broke __________________ I love the smell of fresh shotgun in the morning.

May 27, 2005, 05:57 PM	#17
novus collectus Junior member Join Date: March 15, 2005 Location: Maryland Posts: 940	Personally, I would not worry about the type of gun. I would move to a state that let me defend myself with one though . I would also buy and wear a kevlar toupee for those "from behind" shots he might surprise me with. (hhmmmm....a kevlar, mullet-cutt wig. I'm getting a patent.)

May 27, 2005, 06:56 PM	#18
RsqVet Senior Member Join Date: February 20, 2005 Posts: 2,474	UGH --- This can't be serious can it? I'm sorry but if we are going to spend time, energy and bandwidth can we at liest discuss things that are SOMEWHAT relevent to self defense / home defense / CCW / IDPA or something? This is not, it's a movie or novel plot.

May 27, 2005, 07:09 PM	#19
unclestu Member Join Date: April 1, 2005 Location: Far NE Texas Posts: 98	Too much TV. Way too much TV.

May 27, 2005, 07:17 PM	#20
TwoGuns Senior Member Join Date: February 4, 2000 Location: Sierra Madre, CA Posts: 173	Some people just can't have a little fun. Lighten up guys. __________________ I'll need guns.......lots of guns.

May 27, 2005, 07:29 PM	#21
Duxman Senior Member Join Date: February 16, 2005 Location: VA Posts: 1,294	Playing along OK. I will play along - for fun. First obviously since you found out he was coming to get you: He is not a very good hitman. The best of the best - you would never see them coming: You would just be dead. Information is key. If you can find out what kind of hitman (obviously if you have that much money - you have contacts) - you find out who the hitman is, and set a trap. Hire ex-SAS, and SEALS to ambush the hitman, while hiring even more DELTA and SPETNATZ commandos to take out the ex-wife. When you have money - why do the dirty work yourself? Meanwhile disapear - he cant kill what he cant find. New country, new identity. Cash transactions only. Plastic survey to boot. New fingerprints. New life - find the next ExMs Smith...start all over again.

May 27, 2005, 07:50 PM	#22
Lawyer Daggit Senior Member Join Date: December 5, 2004 Posts: 1,181	First thing- make it very public that you have changed your will! also make it public that you know a hit man has been hired and why. I agree with earlier posts- if the hit man is good you are screwed. If I knew who it was I would consider trying to do something about organising someone to hunt the hunter and quietly slip out of town without letting anyone know where I was going.

May 27, 2005, 08:07 PM	#23
tyme Staff Join Date: October 13, 2001 Posts: 3,355	Head for the nearest school or other gun-free zone. The hitman will have to leave his guns outside, and you can have a good ol' hollywood brawl. __________________ “The egg hatched...” “...the egg hatched... and a hundred baby spiders came out...” (blade runner) “Who are you?” “A friend. I'm here to prevent you from making a mistake.” “You have no idea what I'm doing here, friend.” “In specific terms, no, but I swore an oath to protect the world...” (continuum) “It's a goal you won't understand until later. Your job is to make sure he doesn't achieve the goal.” (bsg)

May 27, 2005, 08:29 PM	#24
just one question Senior Member Join Date: April 5, 2005 Posts: 213	huh tyme if he is gonna kill you... he already has no respect for the law how is a sign goin to stop him

May 27, 2005, 08:44 PM	#25
JRLaws Senior Member Join Date: April 8, 2005 Location: Hills of Kentucky, now. Posts: 177	Stay away from cans. Hitmen hate cans. Join the carnival. As any madman/hitman will tell you, the lot is posted "Carnival personnel only". Hey, the hitman is not carnival personnel. Enjoy your new job as a weight guesser. Problem solved. and people say I'm a Jerk.