I have a suggestion. You may feel it could work with you.
I am going to assume that your wife has a mobile phone. When she goes to bed, she sets it to silent, but with illuminations activated. The phone won't make a sound with in incoming call, but will be lighting up, flashing, what have you.
When you get home and put your key in the lock to open the door, you call the phone.
This means that you don't wake your other half unnecessarily every time you come home.
However, if the sound of you entering the property does wake her, she need only look at her phone to see if it is lighting up with your incoming call.
If you have already hung up, she can see a missed call from you in the few minutes preceding what has woken her up and therefore knows that you are already in the house anyway.
If she wakes from a sound, and there is no call from you, then she knows she may have trouble on her hands and act accordingly.
If, OTOH, she wakes to your curses and shouts, then perhaps you yourself have surprised an intruder, or you have stubbed you toe really badly. She can then leap out of bed with a gun in one hand and ice-spray in the other.
Everybody's a winner, except a would be intruder!
Genius!
Whadyathink?
