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Has anyone else ever run into someone who had it so wrong AND were passing on their ignorance to others?
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The short answer is, yes. The longer answer is this.
Everyone has an opinion as to what caliber is best for the beginner and where they should be aiming that first shot. The truth is that there really isn't a right answer that anyone can give the couple. It's only a persons opinion that they have from their personal experience that they pass on to others. Unfortunately there are those that should be listening instead of talking. Then there are those like yourself that have experience and are willing to pass that on.
I rarely get involved in these types of conversations in a gun store. Mainly because of the situation you ran into. Again, everyone has an opinion and most think that theirs is the right one. When I am asked these types of questions, my typical response is to go to a gun range. Rent a .380, 9mm, .40, and a .45 and see which one trips your trigger. Then you know what caliber to buy. Then visit the gun stores to see what make and model you are comfortable handling.
In my opinion, any other way just starts arguments and gets peoples feelings hurt.
Jim