A 243 with normal loads, or maybe just a bit on the light side will not have enough recoil to be an issue and still have enough power for any deer. Don't over think this, you could just use factory 243 loads and be good.
I wouldn't even consider 7-08 or 30-30. Real numbers from a factory 30-30 load aren't much more than 1900 fps from a 20" barrel and would have more recoil than factory 243. And be less effective on game.
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