For me... priority of "gun likes":
1. Proper feed/fire/eject
2. Accuracy
Definitely want to make sure whatever ammo you choose functions reliably. Accuracy is also
definitely nice, but center-mass at "typical" self-defense distance is a pretty generous target. Any quality firearm with quality ammunition should be more than sufficient in that regard.
I've never had any brand of ammo shoot so poorly out of any of my pistols that I couldn't keep everything in a hamburger bun sized circle at 10 yards, as long as I was "doing my part".
All that's just what philosophy works for me. YMMV.