there are some really light 410 shot shells or even some 22LR snake shot. 
for 12ga the winchester subsonic 7/8 oz bird shot are super light. they are only doing like 950 FPS.
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Shot placement is everything! I would rather take a round of 50BMG to the foot than a 22short to the base of the skull.
all 26 of my guns are 45/70 govt, 357 mag, 22 or 12 ga... I believe in keeping it simple. Wish my wife did as well...
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