Yadda, Yadda, Yadda. The same old story. Don't do this and you shouldn't do that, etc., etc.
You need to give yourself a break and open YOUR eyes. You don't have all the answers my friend, (any more than I do). I am trying to explain about how I would handle these type scenarios in my home.
Try reading your own personal quote (at the bottom of each of your posts),
"Without freedom of THOUGHT, there can be no such thing as wisdom".... Exactly right! Other folks have ideas too.