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bk40: Have you patterned your .410? I would load up several shells and see what sort of holes they make in paper at ten feet. If you get one ragged hole, then the shot should penetrate en masse and could be a good "stopper". If you get a pattern of many small holes, then penetration won't be very good and Mr. Bad Guy probably won't be seriously impaired.
Personally, I wouldn't feel comfortable relying upon a .410, but that's based upon a hunch, not experience. It's certainly better than nothing and there's much to be said for a gun that your wife likes.
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