Yep, everyone knows that the Canadians are forced to stay indoors 24 hours a day to reduce attacks from the wolves and grizzlies there. Frequently they fall prey in their driveways as they step in/out of their cars trying to get to their safe havens though. Fortunately, the sound of 20 million whacko Canadians holding hands and singing "Coom-bay-ah" drowns out the screams of their neighbors as they are devoured by these bloodthirsty predators though.
Phew! thank God we live in the US! I am afraid to travel to Canada where all those big teeth and claws are *wets pants and gets into the fetal postion at the mere thought of a predator, clutching his rifle and trembling in fear*.
P.S. Sarcasm meets with sarcasm