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She needs to know & understand the use of force laws and, more importantly, be able to use lethal force in a critical incident.
If she can't devote the time, $ and/or resources or won't use lethal force against another human being DO NOT buy her a firearm.
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The first order of business is to get the student to be able to shoot reliably and accurately.
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If they are going to put it up and never look at it for 3 years, then any gun is a bad choice. It carries all the risk with little upside-most of us understand that during an emergency, there is little time to practise.
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if she is not going to practice much, a gun would not be a good choice for her in a stress-filled scenario where her minds is on her kids and not on stopping the threat
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If someone is not willing to devote the time to learn to defend them selves than their priorities are messed up. Especially if they have kids.
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A gun may be the worst choice for anyone scared or not trained to use it
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The best advice is usually the least considered in cases like this.
I am always surprised at the folks here that would take the time to describe their favorite choice of gun as a suggestion for someone else to buy, given that that person is not able or interested in learning how to use it safely or legally.
And very few of you have offered suggestions about the most important facts the OP gave regarding the presence of little kids in the mix.
How in the world would you consider that any gun is the best idea here ?