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Old November 30, 2004, 02:04 AM   #1
Senior Member
Join Date: November 28, 2004
Location: Silicon Valley, Ca
Posts: 7,117
When YOU aren't ready...

I originally posted this on another board and it stirred up some interesting conversation. I though y'all would find this thought provoking.

Lots of good discussions here but no one has posted a thread like this so I will, since a recent incident showed me that Murphy was right - anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

The Reality Scenario:
It's in the wee hours just past o'-dark-thirty and you're asleep, resting up for another day of slaving away to earn ammo money. The days have been warm but the nights cool so you have a window ajar for ventilation and through it you hear the jangling sound of breaking glass. Since you live in a condo or townhome it could be your window or that of a neighbor. But the senses command you Battle alert! and you sit up, grab your trusty 1911 (or whatever house gun) throw the covers off, stand up and ...

1. Realize that your eyes are nearly glued shut with "sleep" and it's blurring your vision.

2. Smokers, asthmatics and allergy sufferers trying to take a deep breath are suddenly forced to cough (some worse than others) to clear their airways.

3. Your eyeglasses are on the nightstand (or dresser).

4. Dressed in your BVD's is a tactical error as they are light colored or white - very nice for the BG in the darkness. And they detract from your fierce, manly persona. Those wearing boxers might have to deal with Mr. Willie trying to see whats going on too -- very un-macho.

5. Mother nature is a bitch because you really have to pee.

6. The approaching army band is just your own heart pounding in your ears.

7. Those stiff (arthritic) joint(s) object to certain movements you are trying to make -- like pointing a 2 pound chunk of steel down the hallway.

8. Your nose is running (or worse stuffed up) making you repeatedly sniff/snort or breathe through your mouth.

9. When you try to yell out in your best John Wayne voice "Alright, who's there?" it sounds more like a frightened Don Knotts going through puberty.

10. Some will forget if there is a round chambered in their autopistol and rack the slide. Either you realize you were standing there with an empty chamber (Stoopid!) or you've just dropped a live round on the carpet (Stoopid too!).

11. The remote-control lighting fixture you spent $29.95 for works, however the living-room lamp it controls takes this opportunity to go plink as the $0.69 bulb burns out.

12. The Darth Vader breathing sound is your own as you're trying to carefully peer through the darkness or see into the rest of the house.

A recent visit to a friend's house taught these lessons. In all, there were 3 of us staying the night for a range shoot the next day. The above collection is distilled from the viewpoints of all three of us after awakening under less than ideal circumstances. The glass? It was simply a thermal shocked window on a neighbor's house that shattered when the temp dropped in the early morning hours.
BillC in CA (unfortunately)
Webmaster, Taking on Gun Control -
A gun in the hand beats a cop on the phone
BillCA is offline  
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