View Full Version : Vicious Attack Killer Squirrels...

Josh Smith
October 6, 2007, 01:35 PM
I've been saying it for years. Ain't I been sayin' it? Here's proof! :D

Russian squirrel pack 'kills dog'

Squirrels have bitten to death a stray dog which was barking at them in a Russian park, local media report.

Passers-by were too late to stop the attack by the black squirrels in a village in the far east, which reportedly lasted about a minute.

They are said to have scampered off at the sight of humans, some carrying pieces of flesh.

A pine cone shortage may have led the squirrels to seek other food sources, although scientists are sceptical.

The attack was reported in parkland in the centre of Lazo, a village in the Maritime Territory, and was witnessed by three local people.

A "big" stray dog was nosing about the trees and barking at squirrels hiding in branches overhead when a number of them suddenly descended and attacked, reports say.

"They literally gutted the dog," local journalist Anastasia Trubitsina told Komsomolskaya Pravda newspaper.

"When they saw the men, they scattered in different directions, taking pieces of their kill away with them."

Mikhail Tiyunov, a scientist in the region, said it was the first he had ever heard of such an attack.

While squirrels without sources of protein might attack birds' nests, he said, the idea of them chewing a dog to death was "absurd".

"If it really happened, things must be pretty bad in our forests," he added.

Komosmolskaya Pravda notes that in a previous incident this autumn chipmunks terrorised cats in a part of the territory.

A Lazo man who called himself only Mikhalich said there had been "no pine cones at all" in the local forests this year.

"The little beasts are agitated because they have nothing to eat," he added.


Josh <><

P.S. I think I'll take the M44 this year. J.S.

October 6, 2007, 01:38 PM
Here is one of the EVIL Squirrels.............hpg


October 6, 2007, 11:43 PM
flip your hand up & down like a squirrels tail. You will have a squireel making a BEE_LINE for you. had to shoot in self-defense.

October 7, 2007, 01:28 AM
The squirrels here in Nebraska hunt in a wolf-pack style.

They always go for the eyes first. :barf:


October 7, 2007, 06:06 AM
taking pieces of their kill away with them.

Alfred Hitchcock...eat your heart out!

October 7, 2007, 10:46 AM
Anyone think this is true?

Geoff Timm
October 7, 2007, 10:54 AM
I always suspected the squirrels of ill intent. They are omnivorous. They have claws and strong teeth. OMG! I think we have justification for the existance of the Taurus MODEL 45 TEN .45/.410 (2.5" chamber) STAINLESS STEEL REVOLVER.

Who notes squirrels don't last long in this part of Florida. Something eats them. I suspect the armadillos aren't as harmless as the PETA people say...:eek:

October 7, 2007, 11:07 AM
Ever notice how they look at you when you're in a tree stand? Like you're trespassing on their property. And they've got those beady little red eyes, and then they scamper onto the backside of a tree so that you can't see them while they plot together.......:eek:


October 7, 2007, 02:46 PM
and then they scamper onto the backside of a tree so that you can't see them while they plot together

tee hee, yup. They're funny - they all have their own personalities. Some take great offense at you being in their world, and chatter incessantly, and get right up within 4 or 5 feet of you, and some don't mind too much. Of course, if you're still, some don't even know you're there.

OK, so I guess it's inevitable - who's gonna start the "what gun for squirrel defense" thread? :)

October 7, 2007, 04:11 PM
Visious tree rats........:eek:............hpg

October 7, 2007, 04:34 PM
I like a sling shot for the noisy chatterboxes...Don't think for a second that deer know something is up when they don't shut up...

p.s. I've had to shishkbob several of them while bow hunting. I think they're pretty tasty marinated in itallian dressing, and 'cued over an open fire.

October 7, 2007, 07:14 PM
Squirrels are tasty!!!

I wonder if they have nuclear power plants next to their forest? No acorns, no alternate food source, flesh crazed squirrels, chipmunks terrorizing cats...

I thought it was always the cat with a squirrel or chipmunk being ripped apart. Time sure is changing. Timm did mention they are omnivorous, I suspect the same. I've seen mice practicing cannibalism, I've read somewhere that prairie dogs may do the same. I don't doubt that the squirrels aren't any better, also the squirrels have been exposed to our food scraps, maybe when those squirrels were seen scampering away with their spoils they must be on their way to bbq it. josh

October 7, 2007, 08:42 PM
Don't think for a second that deer know something is up when they don't shut up...

Did you mean to say, "Don't think for a second that deer DON'T know something is up when they don't shut up..." ?

My friend who studies birds by catching them in nets and tagging them says that he's seen squirrels eat the guts out of bird while caught in the net.

C&B, I use super colibris out of a .22 revolver for the squirrels that won't shut up.

October 8, 2007, 01:44 PM
Evil, evil, evil little monstrous beasts! I will do all I can to keep from falling asleep in the woods from now on, Jeez Louise!! :eek::o:D

October 8, 2007, 04:20 PM
Every one of those little rats that sets paw on my property gets a taste of 12ga #6...68 last season...17 so far this.
They raid my tomato garden every year, chew holes in my barn, eat all the acorns off the trees before they fall to the ground for the deer and turkeys, and dig holes in the lawn. In my opinion, they're in the same category as ticks...I make it a point to be sure that there aren't enough left around here to gang attack my dogs.

October 8, 2007, 04:35 PM
Just in: Video of one of the little perps in this case, just after the attack...


October 8, 2007, 04:39 PM
HAH! I just loaded 300 heavy trap loads with 1 1/8 oz of #6 to beat back the onslaught! Come on you little chattering buggers! I'm ready for ya! Notice that the news? paper was Pravda, that bastion of communist rhetoric for the last half century or so. What were we thinking? Of course this story is true. Hope this helps you review your defense plan for the upcoming attacks. CB.

October 8, 2007, 05:23 PM
Yeah, when I lived in SA, they cleaned out two peach trees, a pear and my black berries in less than a week...Then it was war...I skewered em' right out of what was left of my peaches...I think it was around 8...They sure were tasty...Just marinated them a few days, and slow cooked...

Oh, and yes, I did mean don't...in the quote above...

October 8, 2007, 05:58 PM
So, How close was this attack of the killer squirrels to Chernobyl?

October 8, 2007, 09:50 PM
Good thing I don't live in Russia. All we seem to get around here are the dead beat squirrels...


October 8, 2007, 10:15 PM
The .308 Winchester is the minimum squirrel round here in Nebraska.

Magnum calibers are preferred.

October 9, 2007, 01:41 AM
Bigfatts, Dayuuummmm! Them dead beat squirrels should have good taste.
:D He looks like he is about to or just got done scratching the jewels. :D


October 9, 2007, 08:06 AM
Hey Pal can't you read!!


I'll show ya what happens to dumb Hill-Billys who can't read signs!


Them attack guard squacks are bad about posted property here in "The Mountain State"!


arizona hunter
October 9, 2007, 11:30 AM
They are so tough. If they weighed even 20 lbs they would need to classified as big game and I'd use a 6.5 with 120 grain X-bullets--Hmmm, maybe the 30.06 with 180 X bullets.

Wild Bill Bucks
October 9, 2007, 12:39 PM
Killer Bushy Tails, is a good reason to keep a good Hunting Dog Around.


October 9, 2007, 01:30 PM
Well in Arkansas you really have to watch out for them.

They are just itching for a fight.


October 9, 2007, 02:05 PM
here's the ring leader

October 9, 2007, 02:18 PM
From the June 1999 Missouri Conversationist Magazine about half way down the page on the link below.


"Squirrel blurs line between small/big game

If the Boone and Crockett Club had a category for squirrels, Chris Sorrell's place in hunting history would be secure. The Garden City resident was deer hunting on his property near Stockton last fall when he spied what looked like an opossum wearing a white helmet. Then he realized the mystery animal was an enormous squirrel. He returned later with a shotgun to bag the chunky bushytail.

The fox squirrel tipped the scales at six pounds, twice the maximum weight listed for the species in The Wild Mammals of Missouri by Charles and Elizabeth Schwartz. Conservation Department biologists say the white head and white splotches down its back indicate it is a "genetic mosaic," the squirrel equivalent of a calico cat."

Seems to fit here and I'm suprised I remembered the story.


October 9, 2007, 03:09 PM

Please send 4 or 5 of those Arkansas squirrels to the University of Nebraska Cornhuskers football team; our defense could use 'em......


Just kiddin'! GO BIG RED!

October 9, 2007, 03:23 PM


I'm gonna have to lift some weights for a while before I tangle with them. :D

Geoff Timm
October 9, 2007, 04:04 PM
If you have ever seen the British TV show "Daylight Robbery" and "Daylight Robbery II," you will never underestimate the strength, stamina and intelligence of the squirrel.

Who things a semi auto 12 bore 3" magnum and BB shot would not be out of place.

October 9, 2007, 04:05 PM
If you have ever seen the British TV show "Daylight Robbery" and "Daylight Robbery II," you will never underestimate the strength, stamina and intelligence of the squirrel.

I have seen those, quite entertaining


October 9, 2007, 10:05 PM
I'm leaning towards believing. The squirrels around here will sit in the trees and drop or should I say throw walnuts at anyone who gets to close to their trees. I have to shoot them with a bb gun to get them out of the backyard so the kids could go out to play!!

October 10, 2007, 04:33 AM
I heard the crazy squirrels in Southern California shoots back and they roll with G9s backing up their AKs. :D josh

October 10, 2007, 11:03 AM
Bigfatts & Huntinfool - those pics are hilarious...

For your further amusement:





October 10, 2007, 11:26 AM
those videos are funny, the ones that see me ushually only see this though!

October 11, 2007, 12:50 PM
from a biker:

I never dreamed that slowly cruising on my motorcycle through a residential neighborhood could be so incredibly dangerous! Little did I suspect. I was on Brice Street - a very nice neighborhood with perfect lawns and slow traffic. As I passed an oncoming car, a brown furry missile shot out from under it and tumbled to a stop immediately in front of me.

It was a squirrel and must have been trying to run across the road when it encountered the car. I really was not going very fast, but there was no time to brake or avoid it -- it was that close! . I hate to run over animals, and I really hate it on a motorcycle; but a squirrel should pose no danger to me.

I barely had time to brace for the impact. Animal lovers, never fear. Squirrels, I discovered, can take care of themselves!

Inches before impact, the squirrel flipped to his feet. He was standing on his hind legs and facing my oncoming Valkyrie with steadfast resolve in his beady little eyes. His mouth opened; and at the last possible second, he screamed and leapt! I am pretty sure the scream was squirrel for, "Bonzai!" or maybe, "Die you gravy-sucking, heathen scum!" The leap was nothing short of spectacular. He shot straight up, flew over my windshield, and impacted me squarely in the chest. Instantly, he set upon me. If I did not know better, I would have sworn he brought 20 of his little buddies along for the attack. Snarling, hissing, and tearing at my clothes, he was a frenzy of activity. As I was dressed only in a light T-shirt, summer riding gloves, and jeans, this was a bit of a cause for concern. This furry little tornado was doing some damage!

Picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a T-shirt, and leather gloves, puttering at maybe 25 mph down a quiet residential street, and in the fight of his life with a squirrel.

And losing...

I grabbed for him with my left hand. After a few misses, I finally managed to snag his tail. With all my strength, I flung the evil rodent off to the left of the bike, almost running into the right curb as I recoiled from the throw. That should have done it. The matter should have ended right there.

It really should have. The squirrel could have sailed into one of the pristinely kept yards and gone on about his business, and I could have headed home. No one would have been the wiser. But this was no ordinary squirrel. This was not even an ordinary angry squirrel. This was an EVIL MUTANT ATTACK SQUIRREL OF DEATH!

Somehow he caught my gloved finger with one of his little hands; and, with the force of the throw, swung around and with a resounding thump and an amazing impact, he landed squarely on my BACK and resumed his rather antisocial and extremely distracting activities. He also managed to take my left glove with him! The situation was not improved. Not improved at all. His attacks were continuing, and now I could not reach him. I was startled, to say the least. The combination of the force of the throw, only having one hand (the throttle hand) on the handlebars, and my jerking back unfortunately put a healthy twist through my right hand and into the throttle. A healthy twist on the throttle of! a Valkyrie can only have one result.


This is what the Valkyrie is made for; and she is very, very good at it. The engine roared, and the front wheel left the pavement. The squirrel screamed in anger. The Valkyrie screamed in ecstasy. I screamed in - well, I just plain screamed.

Now picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a slightly squirrel-torn t-shirt, wearing only one leather glove, and roaring at maybe 50 mph and rapidly accelerating down a quiet residential street on one wheel, with a demonic squirrel of death on his back.

The man and the squirrel are both screaming bloody murder.

With the sudden acceleration, I was forced to put my other hand back on the handlebars and try to get control of the bike.

This was leaving the mutant squirrel to his own devices; but I really did not want to crash into somebody's tree, house, or parked car. Also, I had not yet figured out how to release the throttle. My brain was just simply overloaded. I did manage to mash the back brake, but it had little effect against the massive power of the big cruiser.

About this time, the squirrel decided that I was not paying sufficient attention to this very serious battle (maybe he was an evil mutant NAZI attack squirrel of death); and he came around my neck and got INSIDE my full-face helmet with me. As the faceplate closed part way, he began hissing in my face. I am quite sure my screaming changed intensity. It had little effect on the squirrel, however. The RPMs on the Dragon maxed out (since I was not bothering with shifting at the moment); so her front end started to drop.

Now, picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a very raggedly torn T-shirt, wearing only one leather glove, roaring at probably 80 mph, still on one wheel, with a large puffy squirrel's tail sticking out of the mostly closed full-face helmet. By now, the screams are probably getting a little hoarse.

Finally, I got the upper hand. I managed to grab his tail again, pulled him out of my helmet, and slung him to the left as hard as I could. This time it worked - sort of.

Spectacularly sort of ...so to speak.

Picture a new scene. You are a cop. You and your partner have pulled off on a quiet residential street and parked with your windows down to do some paperwork. Suddenly, a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a torn T-shirt flapping in the breeze, and wearing only one leather glove, moving at probably 80 mph on one wheel, and screaming bloody murder roars by, and with all his strength throw! was a live squirrel grenade directly into your police car.

I heard screams.

They weren't mine.

I managed to get the big motorcycle under control and dropped the front wheel to the ground. I then used maximum braking and skidded to a stop in a cloud of tire smoke at the stop sign of a busy cross street. I would have returned to 'fess up (and to get my glove back). I really would have. Really. Except for two things.

First, the cops did not seem interested or the slightest bit concerned about me at the moment. When I looked back, the doors on both sides of the patrol car were flung wide open. The cop from the passenger side was on his back, doing a crab walk into somebody's front yard, quickly moving away from the car. The cop who had been in the driver's seat was standing in the street, aiming a riot shotgun at his own police car.

So, the cops were not interested in me. They often insist to "let the professionals handle it" anyway.

That was one thing. The other?

Well, I could clearly see shredded and flying pieces of foam and upholstery from the back seat. But I could also swear I saw the squirrel in the back window, shaking his little fist at me. That is one dangerous squirrel. And now he has a patrol car. A somewhat shredded patrol car, but it was all his.

I took a deep breath, turned on my turn-signal, made a gentle right turn off of Brice Street, and sedately left the neighborhood. I decided it was best to just buy myself a new pair of gloves. And awhole lot of Band-Aids.

October 11, 2007, 01:09 PM
Laughing so hard I had to close my office door!! Probably get reprimanded for that later....

October 11, 2007, 01:21 PM
sorry dav, i've read that story at least a dozen times and it still makes me laugh.:D

October 15, 2007, 02:49 PM
Hey "Wild Bill",
Sure could have used that dog the time I ran into a pack of Saber-Toothed Chip-Monks

October 15, 2007, 08:32 PM
Very, very funny one-shot. Copied, pasted and sent to my whole address book!!

Wolf Lies Down
October 15, 2007, 10:20 PM
-Back in the late 1700s - early 1800s, the Russians were trading with the Indians and Mexicans out here in California. There is, in the maritime archives in Moscow, the original ship's manifest for the Russian ship GOTCHUNOV, which sailed in 1803 with a destination of what would later become San Francisco Bay. The ship made several more stops down the coast of California, including San Simeon, Avila, Santa Barbara, San Buena Ventura, Los Angeles and San Diego.

The manifest from this particular voyage of the GOTCHUNOV'S was especially revealing in that an unusual addendum thereto was a brief report in the hand of the ship's captain, Antonoly Gimebrakov. For this particular voyage in 1803, the main cargo of the GOTCHUNOV was approximately 130,000 examples of the vicious Russian squirrel, which represented the captured overpopulation of the species from various public areas in Moscow. The Crown had mobilized a crack regiment of Russian soldiers to work capturing the squirrels alive after they had pulled down, ravaged and consumed several elderly Muscovites and almost a dozen school children. Gemebrakov explains that the Czar's wife, Czarina Dumschitzkov, and her entourage considered the squirrels "cute" and "darling" and had decided that the squirrels must be protected. It was ordered that, rather than killing the overpopulation of these vicious squirrels in Russia, they would be captured alive and exported secretly to other lands. The GOTCHUNOV sailed with its hold and crew quarters modified to accept the specially built cages and several tons of Russian acorns and grain; food for the unlikely passengers. Ten squirrel wranglers, to feed and care for the squirrels, were on board. An envoy of the crown was also on board the GOTCHUNOV to monitor the well being of the squirrels, oversee their care and release, and to prepare a report for the Crown upon the GOTCHUNOV's return to its Russian homeport. The limited deck space on the GOTCHUNOV served as storage for trade goods and crew quarters on the outbound voyage.

Soon after reaching California waters, the GOTCHUNOV put in at secluded coves in Spanish California near its scheduled stops of San Francisco, San Simeon, Avila, Santa Barbara, San Buena Ventura, Los Angeles and San Diego where, at each stop, some 20,000+ of the creatures were put ashore. During the process of freeing the squirrels, the GOTCHUNOV suffered thirteen crewmember casualties. Eight crewmen ("all good men", as stated in Gimebrakov's report) were killed, torn to shreds and devoured by the squirrels. Five other crewmembers suffered serious injuries, but were not killed.

The deed was done. In the period between 1803 and 1875 the squirrels were directly responsible for the decimation and extinction of no fewer than twelve American Indian tribes in California and many of California's indigenous animals.

The squirrels found a natural paradise in California and adapted readily to California's balmy climate and the huge abundance of food in the form of acorns from the California Scrub Oak, which California was virtually forested with at that time. With no natural enemies, the squirrel population soared exponentially. The aggressive squirrels soon decimated the deer, Tule elk, mountain lion and even the once-abundant grizzly bear population in California. Other animal species suffering virtual extinction in California at the paws of this predatory creature were various hawk species, the California Blue Eagle, the large California Dire Wolf, The California Wild Turkey, a little-known marsupial, related directly to the kangaroo and called the California Leaping Snipe, and of course, the great California Condor. These unique animals (and others) are either gone forever or live in small population groups. The Dire Wolf is gone, the Leaping Snipe is gone, the California Blue Eagle is gone, the grizzly bear is gone from California, the few Tule Elk that are left live on a preserve near Bakersfield, California, and today, the California Condor numbers fewer than 100 in the wild. Hawks, deer and wild turkey have made a recovery, albeit not to their former population levels. Interestingly, the deer in California, although recovering well from near extinction, came back as a smaller-in-stature species compared to their counterparts in areas to the east of California. Researchers reckon this was an amazing "overnight" evolutionary survival tactic brought on by the threat of the squirrels. The smaller-stature deer requires fewer resources to exist, and were able to more quickly evade the pack-attack methods of the vicious squirrels and can hide easier. Recent studies of the deer show that their scent is different than their cousins to the east, perhaps making the California deer less attractive to the palate of the squirrels.

More importantly, anthropological and archeological research beginning around the turn of the twentieth century revealed evidence pointing to the fact that the virtual disappearance of native Indian populations in California, once thought to be due to the encroachment of the white man, were instead directly attributable to the squirrels. Huge numbers of Indian hunters never returned home from the hunt. The squirrels took young Indian children right out of camp and from under the noses of their parents. Infants simply vanished from their lodges; killed silently and carried off in the night by the squirrels. Water supplies were soiled beyond use and food and other resources that the Indian relied upon were severely reduced by the direct or indirect activities of the squirrels.

In the late 1850s a terrible draught, lasting almost ten years, struck California. The "modern", civilized economy of California at the time was actually fairly primitive, consisting almost entirely of huge Spanish Land Grants and the Catholic Church. Spanish Dons controlled huge parcels of land and owned many thousands of the scrawny, long-horned type cattle of that time. The main commodities generated by these huge ranchos were hides and tallow. Meat from the slaughter of cattle was left out in the sun where the squirrels ferociously devoured it, leaving scarcely the bones. However, with the draught (which ultimately doomed the huge rancho and its almost medieval lord/serf society in California), the Mexican Dons began to cut down the native oaks (which take many decades to mature), hoping the meager foliage might allow the starving and thirsty herds to survive until the draught was over. This desperate tactic of course failed and left huge areas of previously forested land barren, eliminating the acorns and the shelter that the squirrels enjoyed. However where the cattle died off and the land grants were pieced-out and sold, the readily adaptable squirrels performed an amazing evolutionary shift within only a few years, becoming burrowing animals and transforming into what we know today as the California Ground Squirrel. Although the physical appearance of the squirrel has changed from its Russian ancestors, the underlying evil, vicious and ferocious nature of the squirrel has not. The only remaining colony of the original Russian squirrels is in the San Francisco Bay area's Golden Gate Park, where certain immigrant populations (Southeast Asia, Kentucky and Tennessee) keep them in check.

In the case of the extinction of California's native population, one particular case in point is the plight of Ishi, the last living member of the of California's now-extinct Yana Indian culture, specifically the Yahi tribe. The Yana culture was a peace-loving people with a deep respect for the land, as well as well as for the creatures that inhabited it. The Yana and its various tribal subcultures had always been careful to preserve the land while effectively living off it. The squirrels changed all that within a few short years and the Indians were never able to effectively adapt. In Ishi's case, the tiny remnants of his tribe, the Yahi, spent most of its time hiding from the squirrels by staying downwind, living discreetly and quietly, staying off main trails, covering their scent trails and living in fear of discovery. Even this ghost-like existence was not enough. When the rest of his tribe succumbed to attacks by the squirrels, leaving Ishi the lone survivor of his culture, his loneliness and fear were unbearable. But Ishi was a wise man and a survivor, and he had learned that not all animals or men were evil, like the squirrels. Around 1911, Ishi was found in the hills of California and rescued by scholars (and their protective military escort) doing archeological and anthropological research into the puzzle of the disappearance of the Yana culture. Ishi lived out the remainder of his life safely on the campus of a California university, where he was able to enlighten scholars regarding his culture and their day-to-day struggle for survival against the squirrels.

Many scholarly papers and books were written about Ishi. One book is:
Ishi, the Last of His Tribe
by: Theodora Kroeber

Where the white man moved west, the squirrels moved east. Today, Anthropologists, Archeologists, Biological Historians and others are tentatively proposing the theory that the Great Plains buffalo herds were not put to extinction (near extinction) by the white man, but by the squirrels. This controversial theory has gained solid support in the scientific community based on preliminary findings.

Meanwhile, in California, the fight goes on between man and beast. Today, in 2007, nothing does a Californiano's heart more good than to hear the solid thwack and to see one of these vermin explode into mist under the impact of a with a .17HMR.

It's all true....HONEST!
Wolf Lies Down