View Full Version : Funny or Amusing CCW instances

February 4, 2006, 11:03 PM
I am interested in hearing of some funny concealment stories. I'll start.

I was out with my wife the other night, just doing some shopping. I carry a CZ-75 compact in a SS Comp-Tac Shirt tucker holster. We cruise by the Men's Warehouse, and she says, while we are here, you should get fitted for your Tux (Friend's wedding coming up, I best man.) Fine. We go in, get the ball rolling, and guy gets to the measurements. He takes my waist, writes down 36'. :eek: My wife shrugs, and I say "sir, thats not my real waist size, I wear a 32ish. He gives me a "yea, all the fat guys say that." look, and walks away to get the shoes. I look at my wife, she shrugs and says "your tux needs to fit, tell him." He gets back, and I say "Sir, we need to fix the waist measurement *recieve another look, so i say screw it* I am a permit holder and you measured my pistol as well as me. We need to fix that." He looked at me like :confused: , then was totally cool with it. Apparently is is a relatively common thing. We measured underneath the pistol, then talked about guns for the rest of the sale.

The look on his face :confused: was pretty good, though.

Sir William
February 4, 2006, 11:38 PM
That does happen. I tell sales people that I need a largersize for IWB and the next size up for coats and jackets to allow for a shoulder holster. I have had one blissninnie who just turned pale and asked someone else to wait on me. I often buy Carhartt bachelor buttons. I fit them to my pants and do use suspenders. A sales lady asked me once why I bought so many, so often. I told her why and for what purpose. The local Carhartt store stocks them in bulk and sells suspenders too. I buy from them and so do other CCWers.

February 5, 2006, 01:25 AM
I don’t know how funny this will be to everyone else buy my wife and I got a kick out of it when it happened.

One night my wife’s sister called up and wanted my wife and I to double date with her and her new “boyfriend.” My sister-in-law had just met this guy and knew absolutely nothing about him so my wife told me she would feel more comfortable if I carried. In Ohio when you carry you have to have the gun on your person in plain sight while in a vehicle. We weren’t driving anywhere with the other couple so it wasn’t an issue. I took my Glock .40 and since it was cold out and we were dressing up I wore my favorite full-length black leather coat (a coat that some people tell me is intimidating). The night went by without incident but I didn’t particularly like the guy. At the end of the night as my wife and I got in the car I asked her “well what did you think of him?” She replied “I don’t know.” “Yeah” I agreed as I un-holstered my Glock and clipped to my waist in front for the drive home “he seems a bit shady to me.” Suddenly we both started laughing at the irony that we were calling him shady and the whole time he had no idea that I had been carrying a gun under my long black coat, something that would have probably freaked him out to no end had he known.

February 5, 2006, 08:16 AM
Last month I was getting a haircut at the local solon, all women cutters. As the gal that was cutting my hair turned my shirt collar down she sees the leather strap on my shoulder holster. She asked if I was a cop and I replied that I was not. Then she got real jittery. After about 5 minutes it seemed to only get worse, so I reached into my pocket and handed her my CCW permit. I told her I normally don’t let others know that I am a permit holder, but in this case I sensed the uneasiness of the situation. She looked at my permit and thanked me for letting her know. We then spent the rest of the time talking about CCW and she said she felt safer knowing there were law-abiding citizens carrying guns. I was back in the solon last week and she sees me walk in. She tells her coworkers “he’s mine” before I even had a chance to sit down.

February 5, 2006, 08:52 AM
the first time I carried in a public establishment was the epitomy of paranoia for me. I had tried my Taurus 85 4" in my jacket breast pocket before going to the store and it seemed to fit perfectly and was undetectable. Well after walking around a bit it started to settle into the jacket pocket and the handle turned outward causing a distinct and obvious bulge in the jacket. I was in a sporting goods type place and i just new everyone either thought i was carrying or shoplifting. I have since become much more comfortable with concealed carry, decided to get a more concealable weapon as well as the appropriate holster.

February 5, 2006, 10:39 AM
When I turned 21 and got my permit I just knew that everyone I saw knew that I was carrying. But the truth is that if you do it right nobody knows. Most would see the buldge and say "That just CANT be a gun on that person."

February 5, 2006, 04:50 PM
I used to go to a certain barber in town, . . . he had cut my hair as well as my son's for quite a number of years. He and two lady hair dressers opened their own place and I ambled on down next time I needed a cut.

In the front door and hello to every one, . . . looking out the back door I see the "No Guns Allowed" red circle, . :barf: . . asked him and he sent me to the front to ask the ladies.

They were afraid that some guy would come in, . . . go use the bath room, . . . leave his pistol laying on the sink or the toilet, . . . and one of their kids would wind up shooting the place up.:eek:

At the time, . . . I just was flabbergasted, . . . now I just laugh about it. Paranoia can cause people to do some really funny and stupid things.

May God bless,

PS: Yeah, . . . I got a new barber, . . . and she's cool with CCW.:D

February 5, 2006, 06:00 PM
not really funny but more on the lines of people thinking about guns the wrong way...

my sister is pretty seriously handicapped, so when my parents leave town i come home. usually have help though. anyway, since it's my parents place, i "let my hair down," usually just wear a t-shirt and have a tendency to leave my wallet, watch, phone and gun on the nightstand when i turn in. there have been a couple times when i've either become uncovered or the respite workers wake me up during the night because my sister's up... tend to be real quiet for the rest of the time we're around after that.

i wish there weren't so many silly people out there, chill out already. most of them see the safe walking around the house anyway, what do they think's in there, gold bars?

February 5, 2006, 08:58 PM
Last year I was dropping my middle school aged daughter off early at her parochial school, becuse she was boarding a charter bus to take a school sponsored trip to Dallas TX. Unfortunately, I could not be a chaparone myself, but several parents were chaparoning.

I was assisting one of the female chaparones with loading the luggage in the side compartment of the bus when I noticed the butt of her J frame peeking out from under her Bolero type jacket. In short order the jacket was past the grip and the gun was exposed. I stopped what I was doing and stood before her and patted that area on my own flank. She reached back, felt her exposed weapon and went stark white. I told her I would finish loading the luggage, thanked her for carrying, and told her to go get another jacket. She came back later in a windbreaker.

Nowadays, when I drop off my daughter and I run into that lady we both still smile knowingly.

February 5, 2006, 10:06 PM
When I first started carrying I bought a used P90DC Ruger 45 and a leather shoulder holster from the local shop . Soon afterward I discovered that sometimes when reholstering the mag release would rub the holster and drop the mag to the floor . About a month later I was standing in line at the local Speedway buying some chips and soda when I heard a clunk , I bent down picked up the mag shoved it into my pocket .Then I noticed everyone in the store was very nerviously eyeing me . The next day I traded the Ruger for a Desert Eagle 45 and have never looked back .

February 6, 2006, 09:44 AM
This actually happened several years ago. A married couple (both of them police officers) went into their bank and were standing in line for the next available bank teller. When they got to the front of the line, the teller directly in front of them appeared to have ended a transaction with a male customer, so the married couple stepped forward.

The teller had a horrified expression on her face, and the husband/officer asked her if she had just been robbed. She had, and was holding onto the piece of paper that the robber had given her.

The husband/officer had gotten a good look at the suspect, and figured that he would at least try to see if the robber got into a waiting car. After a few steps, the husband/officer realized that he wasn't carrying an off-duty handgun. He turned to his wife and asked her if she had a gun in her purse. She did, and handed it to her husband.

The husband/officer exited the bank, looked around the parking lot and was able to see the robber walking around, trying the doors of several parked cars. He found the rear door of a station wagon unlocked, opened it, and got inside the vehicle, but ducked down.

The husband/officer got closer to the station wagon and kept it under observation until uniformed officers arrived. The suspect had laid down on the back seat of the station wagon, and had pulled a blanket over himself. The uniformed officers commanded the suspect to exit the vehicle, and he was taken into custody without any problems.

After the husband/officer had given a statement to the uniformed officers, he returned inside the bank. His wife was waiting for him, and told him that the bank teller had FAINTED shortly after seeing the gun being removed from her purse and handed to him!

February 6, 2006, 02:39 PM
This is a 'sea story'. It isn't impossible, but I got it second-hand and cannot verify the truth of it.

In the 1970s, a man (we'll call him 'Joe') in Washington DC entered an elevator occupied by a rather 'hard' looking individual. As the doors closed, the 'hard' man produced a switchblade, popped it open and started cleaning under his fingernails, glancing at 'Joe'.

'Joe' was a federal agent. Without comment, he produced the 2.5" model 19 he was carrying and started cleaning under his fingernails with the front sight blade. Hard man put the switchblade away, appearantly without closing it.

This one was mine. I was in a slop-chute pool hall (they advertised a fight every night and stabbings on the week-end) backing up a colleague who ran the security there. Security had earlier that same evening arrested and turned over to the local police an individual who had been causing trouble.
I was approached by an individual who accused me of being 'one of them'. In his drunken state, he went on to say something like, "We know who you are and we're going to f*** you up".
I asked him if he meant he was intending to cause me bodily harm. He repeated the statement about "... f*** you up..."
I removed a set of earplugs from my pocket and started inserting them in my ears.
He asked me why I was doing that and I told him.
He left and didn't come back.

I thought it was funny.

February 6, 2006, 04:34 PM
I removed a set of earplugs from my pocket and started inserting them in my ears.
He asked me why I was doing that and I told him.
He left and didn't come back.

LMFAO!!!!!!!!! That one's classic, friend!

February 6, 2006, 04:51 PM
This was a few months ago....

I live out in a rural area. I was after dark and I was working on some stuff for college. Mom tells me that there's somebody in our driveway. She'd passed him on the way in and he said he was out of gas. Deciding to err on the side of caution, I dug out my trusy 1911, loaded up and shoved it in an old Bagmaster holster and put on my jacket. I proceded to walk down all 400 feet of my driveway with a maglight and gas can. My neigbor was shooting the breeze with the guy. Ron gave me a look and went back to talking. I had about 2 inches of holster sticking out! :eek: After giving the guy the gas I tried to discretely pull the jacket back down only to have it later keep riding back up.

Needless to say, I felt like a guy at a black tie affair who just realized his sticker was pecking out :o

Guess I'll need a better holster.....

Dave R
February 6, 2006, 11:26 PM
One of the first times I carried to a retail establishment, I had to use the rest room. I had not yet practiced what to do with an inside-the-waistband holster when using the restroom.

My handgun wound up in the toilet. Fortunately, before I had a chance to use it.

After a moments thought, I removed the gun, and continued with my business, while doing a quick and wet field strip. Not really pleasant. Also, TP does not do a very good job of getting water out of the nooks and crannies of a slide.

Did my best to disinfect my hands, and continued my errand. Once home, I did a thorough cleaning. And did a little practice of the "rest room drill."

February 7, 2006, 08:40 AM
LOL Dave, I know I would have retrieved the weapon, but I have left a cell phone at the bottom of a nasty public toilet:barf:

February 7, 2006, 08:25 PM
A fellow salesman at the company where I worked was down in Ecuador to close a sale. The clients lawyer, a dandified sort of guy who thought a lot of himself, was in the room. When he crossed his legs a snubbie dropped out of his ankle holster and on to the tile floor making a hell of a racket and scareing the sh-t out of everyone. The lawyer was quite subdued during the rest of the negotiations!

February 7, 2006, 10:44 PM
One of my buddies, yeah that's it one of my buddies, had a lady ask him out when he was carrying a Glock 26 in the Thunderware holster one evening. Must have been his cologne :)

February 8, 2006, 09:10 AM
Maybe they had been close dancing?

Mr. James
February 8, 2006, 09:36 AM
I removed a set of earplugs from my pocket and started inserting them in my ears.
He asked me why I was doing that and I told him.
He left and didn't come back.

You don't by any chance resemble Clint Eastwood, do you?


Grape Ape
February 14, 2006, 05:04 PM
I’m starting to feel like an old timer, but I started carrying (in the early 90’s) cell phones were still rare and too expensive for me. Back then I was also a lot skinnier not too imposing.

I was standing in front of the GameWerks (arcade/restaurant/bar) in Seattle waiting for my two roommates to out so we could leave. There were half a dozen other people loitering there including two pretty beefy homeboys, one of whom told me that he needed a phone. I had a pager and figured he did to, so I told I thought there was a payphone down the block. He repeated that he needed a phone so again I told him where about the pay phone. Now he puffs his chest up and says “No, I want a cell phone”. So I was bladed off in condition (redish) orange and wondering how my disparity of force argument would hold up in court when my (more menacing, but worthless in a fight) roommates show up and homebody #2 mutters something to #1 and they wander off.

About ten minutes later I realized that my S&W was printing though my sweater and that he had probably mistaken the lump for a cell phone. Boy was he going to be disappointed. :D

February 15, 2006, 08:14 PM
"About ten minutes later I realized that my S&W was printing though my sweater and that he had probably mistaken the lump for a cell phone. Boy was he going to be disappointed. "

LOL disappointed to say the least.

February 16, 2006, 09:53 PM
I removed a set of earplugs from my pocket and started inserting them in my ears.
He asked me why I was doing that and I told him.
He left and didn't come back.You don't by any chance resemble Clint Eastwood, do you?Only in my dreams. When this happened I was in my early thirties and looked - ordinary. But I was serious.

February 16, 2006, 10:15 PM
Once upon a time...

I had a holster or two that would allow me to...err...access a firearm if need through my fly. Nature of the work I was doing and this access would be a last ditch effort in the fact matters had gone seriously south and ...maybe the BGs would allow a victim to tinkle.

1) there is not a real good way to have one of these "designed" much less fitted to you.

2) there is not a real good way to practice drawing an unloaded gun in practice.

Yes there were other comments made, which I best not share...
Besides I figure some will spew keyboards and monitors just thinking about this and figuring out their own comments.

No, I never got into a situation that required me to use this.


February 17, 2006, 04:05 AM
i have a holster and ccw but havent started to carry yet.maybe cause the holster's not really good for concealing.it's not a IWB.it's a sidekick from uncle mikes.(tip of barrel sticks out a small bit past my sweatshirt) i'll never be able to carry with it during the summer unless i want attention from LEO's and ANTIs that i may come across.

anyone here carry something the same size as a beretta 92D during the summer? if so do you have any problems from others?

( i know it's probably a question i can figure out myself but...just wanted to know if others carried full size and what kind of things you run into like say comments from people)

February 17, 2006, 02:08 PM
Once upon a time...

I had a holster or two that would allow me to...err...access a firearm if need through my fly. Nature of the work I was doing and this access would be a last ditch effort in the fact matters had gone seriously south and ...maybe the BGs would allow a victim to tinkle.Another re-invention of the wheel.

In the '50s, a gentleman named Ken or Kent Madden (it's been awhile and the years have not been kind to my brain function) made what he called the "Fly Holster". It was accessed by opening one's fly. One must remember, in the '50s, men's trousers were rather loose - not as baggy as current 'hiphop' styles, but loose. The holster depended from a belt worn inside the trousers and outside one's undershorts. The holster and small revolver rested on the off side, over the thigh.

To be completely honest, I've only seen a picture of this holster, and only the one.

However, some years later after seeing this ingenious device, I built what I called a 'dangle' holster. Completely inside the trousers, it dangled from a strap hooked over the belt. It fit (complete with Star BKM) just on the right thigh, somewhat forward of the right pocket. One drew by sticking the shooting hand down the front of the trousers - hopefully causing a distraction of horror or mirth on the part of one's adversary.

I was working in the Imperial Valley of California at the time and no one wore a jacket or vest of any sort; daytime temperatures were in the 115 to 120 degree range from early April to mid September.

February 17, 2006, 03:23 PM
Sounds a lot like a Smartcarry or Thunderwear rig to me...

February 17, 2006, 03:47 PM
saw a guy in line at the bank the other day. recognized the royal robbins 5.11 tactical cargo pants. thought i was the only guy in alaska to wear them. i was going to bring it up, but decided against it. then when he's at the teller trying to cash some checks they ask him for a second form of ID. his teller then asks my teller 'is this an acceptable ID?' holding up his CHL.

February 19, 2006, 02:23 PM
I guess this isn’t a funny story, or amusing, but I’ll share it on this thread since I’m new.

I was traveling from OKC to CO and had to pee while driving through Wakeenie KS about 0200.I pulled into a rest stop, no cars at all on the highway, no cars at the stop, one big rig asleep and idling. I put my Ultra CDP in my IWB and ran <I really ran> to the can. When I came out there was a Bronco parked inches from my trucks door. Four guys were exiting the driver’s side of that Bronco. The 4 of them gathered in front of their truck, looked at me, and started walking towards me never taking their eyes off me. Now I’m no idiot… there was no way to get back to my driver’s door and 4 guys never pee together. Where did these guys come from? I had maybe 20 yards as they were walking towards me, slowly, not a word, eyes on me. I put my hand behind my back inside my coat. They stopped, looked at each other, then kept walking towards me together, eyes on me. You know how sometimes you can almost feel electricity in the air… those hairs stand up on your neck… I have that feeling, I get chills just writing this. I pulled out my shinny .45 and pointed it at the ground. 15 yards, no one is moving and no one has blinked. The first guy looks at his buddies then at me, takes a step towards me and I pointed it at his chest. Still no one blinks. They all back up together, not a word. They got in their little blue Bronco <hasty now> on the driver’s side, back up, and peel their tires out of the rest area. I holster my gun and walk shakily though triumphantly back to my truck.

Now, I know I broke some rules… You can’t carry concealed in KS and I don’t give a damn; I carried to the can anyway.
You should never pull your weapon unless you’re going to use it; I did it anyway because I felt threatened.
I refuse to be a statistic and I feel I came very close that night. I have learned never to pull all nighters going to see friends, I never use road side rest stops at night, and I always go to gas stations that are well lit with people around. I no longer like Wakeenie KS. 


February 19, 2006, 03:48 PM
My wife and I have season tickets to a local community theater in Scottsdale, Arizona. About a month ago, we went to see a production of "Damn Yankees." This is theater in the round, where there's no conventional stage, just a raised 6" platform in the middle of the room with the seating arranged around it. You can literally reach out and touch the performers -- and they can do the same to you.

Halfway through the production, the lead actress, who is playing a slinky character named Lola, breaks into a song about seducing married men. The actress in this production was VERY attractive. As she performed the song, she went around to the men seated in the front rows, touching their faces, holding their hands, etc. Now, the people who typically attend community theater in Scottsdale are well into Social Security age. The attentions of this lovely young woman brought smiles to all their faces.

My wife and I were sitting in the front row, as well. As the actress continued with the song, she evidently decided that I, as a younger man of 34, could tolerate her next bit of flirtation better than the elderly men in the audience. So instead of caressing my face, she seated herself in my lap.

Now I'd not usually object to a stunning young lady sitting in my lap, and I'd normally have played along by wrapping my arms around her. However, in this case, my hands were entirely preoccupied by steering her away from the pistol I was carrying in my right front pocket! I kept my right hand firmly over the pistol so she wouldn't put her hand on it, as my left hand attempted to keep her from shifting her weight so she wouldn't end up seated on the gun.

What should have been a fun moment was transformed into one of the most uncomfortable moments of my life. The actress finally planted a kiss on my (flushed, I'm sure) cheek and sprang away. I glanced over at my wife, who was practically in tears laughing, knowing exactly what had just happened.

Next time I go to the theater, I'm wearing a belt holster.

February 19, 2006, 08:45 PM
Ok, First off for the Beretta guy above, I carry a full size 92G in either an IWB Galco Scout or an OWB Galco Fletch High Ride 24/7.

Summer winter etc. A long T-Shirt or an oversized button down works just fine for the IWB. (it was 50 bucks for the holster)

I can tuck my shirt in and blouse out the back some to cover the Butt of the gun.

Ok, the funny part: Back to Scottsdale; I have been there about a dozen times (I live about 200 miles north of Phoenix). I open carry, hopefully to scare a soccer mom. Butt.... NOBODY notices. I had one kid come up to me and ask me some questions about the type of gun.

I mean seriously if you live in an open carry state the best concealment in the summer is simply to open carry

Blackwater OPS
February 20, 2006, 11:28 PM
Last week I was driving home through a mostly empty desert area in CA. My truck's radiator cracked about 50 miles from home and it was a Sunday so everything was closed. I decided to call AAA and get a tow home and take care of it on monday. So a while later the tow guy shows up, with another car on the tow truck(it was a big flatbed type). So he hooks mine up, and says I have to share the cab with this other guy who is headed the same way as me. So the guy asks who wants the window seat and the kid who is sharing the ride says ME!, while i'm still thinking about whats in my strong side holster. Needless to say it was pretty cramped in there and as soon as the guy sat down he gave me a funny look. He kept his mouth shut the whole way though.:)

Grape Ape
February 25, 2006, 02:04 AM
Back in high school I dropped by a friend’s and got elected to deal with the (loaded) revolver her loser brother had left on the coffee table since someone was bring by a toddler or two later and my friend and her mom were both afraid of guns.

I was also pretty clueless at the time, I didn’t even know how to get the cylinder to swing out. But I was able to remove the cylinder pin (or whatever you call it, I'm an auto guy) and cylinder. I left the revolver, but kept the cylinder (for at least a month) and drilled him on responsible gun ownership every time I saw him.