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Old March 12, 2008, 10:48 PM   #1
hogdogs
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One more facet of training my Lil' girl...

I have no clue of how to do this or who to use. I have been telling her that situational awareness is MORE important than a pink pistol in her purse. I advised her to expect some "real world" tests from now until she is old enough to carry. Such as having an acquaintance follow her to the car while at the store, have some one pounce at her who has laid in wait at her car. Purse snatchin' etc. My fear is that someone aware will see this and attack or shoot my buddy possibly missing and hitting my little jewel! I can do alot of commentary walks with her pointing out the things daddy is aware of than let her try to comment to me but I am sure a teenage girl will learn alot from a hands on "mugging"... so how would my fellow TFL members go about working real world awareness into a teen especially your own daughter? On a budget limited to near nothin'...
Brent
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Old March 13, 2008, 04:26 AM   #2
DWARREN123
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Don't have anyone actually do that, just follow and note times/places where something may have happened. Someone could get hurt if a someone else sees an bad act, maybe her.
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Old March 13, 2008, 04:53 AM   #3
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Good Samaritans and dogs, too

People might intervene, definitely.

Also, a friend of mine had his dog attack a kid a few years ago. The boy was playing with my friend's daughter. They were playing some form of tag, and the girl was shrieking. Dog saw and heard this, misinterpreted what was happening, and cleared the fence for the first time since my friend had owned the dog. Took the boy down by the lower leg.

Luckily, injuries were minor. Also luckily, the boy's parents were understanding about how the incident occurred, and were satisfied by my friend paying the medical bills.
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Old March 13, 2008, 01:40 PM   #4
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It's never a good idea to stage a mugging. NEVER.

First, if she believes it's staged, there's a chance that she will be laxidasical about her response, trying not to really hurt her "buddy." The problem is, maybe this is the staged mugging, and maybe this one is REAL!

On the other hand, if she doesn't believe it's staged, then the encounter will SERIOUSLY scare her, and it could lead to injury and/or liability to your buddy.

Bad idea. Seriously.
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Old March 13, 2008, 01:49 PM   #5
MLeake
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I didn't read the OP closely enough; this is a horrible idea for a lot of reasons

In Florida, your buddy could be charged with assault for conveying a credible threat to your daughter. If physical contact were made, he can add battery to the charging sheet.

Furthermore, you could potentially be charged for setting up the encounter.

Don't forget, DCF and Child Protective Services would probably take a dim view on this type of training.

Last, you might teach your daughter that she can't trust you.

It goes without saying that there are a lot of us out here, that upon seeing some guy stalk and grab a teenage girl, would either draw down on him or punch his lights out, depending on how the situation read.
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Old March 13, 2008, 01:52 PM   #6
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As I said in the OP I see the obvious risk to both a buddy and to her. I remember some guy that charged boucoup bucks to train folks about self defense than they were "tested" with the faked muggin' etc... I think it was either fully staged or the bystanders were just not willing to be involved.... I think the wisest method will be walking along and pointing out the things I see and than let her try...
Brent
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Old March 13, 2008, 02:04 PM   #7
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mleake, I told her that this "MAY" be an option. I also told her that in my part of Florida, a buddy would be nuts to take on the task as crime here does not go un-noticed and citizens would likely have him whooped or worse before he or i could explain. BTW Brianna is in a quandary at school today. They still deal out swats. A girl has been stealing from the librarian and when the money was noticed missing she blamed it on Bri who is also an "assistant" in the library. Bri had this "friend" over for her birthday. I would be a hypocrite to tell her I would not do anything about it. I expect bri will come home with a sore but or suspended tonight. Her and I are gonna start some daddy daughter walks and talks related to growing up in this world....
Brent
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Old March 13, 2008, 02:29 PM   #8
MLeake
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Hogdogs

Telling her that this "MAY" be an option could inoculate you to an extent on the father daughter trust issue. And I'll stipulate that you are aware that Lower Alabama is full of the type of people that might intervene (I used to live in P'cola, and love the area. However, that still leaves open the additional possibilities that Samurai and I raised.

As Samurai noted, your daughter might expect a false attack, and not respond wholeheartedly to an actual one if such were to occur, under the false assumption that the attacker was your buddy. You would not want her to be hesitant to go for eyes or groin in that instance, for example.

And as I pointed out, your buddy and you might be charged, not necessarily by your daughter, but by the DA if any witness reported the incident. If that happened, the odds would be high that you would face an investigation by DCF/CPS. You might come out of that ok, but as a general rule it's not good policy to get involved with the system in a negative way.

If you live in Pensacola, there's a pretty good dojo at the industrial park by PNS, Big Green Drum, which is affiliated with Aikido Schools of Ueshiba. One of the strong points of aikido is its emphasis on escapes from grabs, which can be pretty useful to females in particular.

Having your daughter read Pax's corneredcat.com info would also be useful, but I think you are doing that already.

Best wishes, and good luck with developing a safe and practical training plan.
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Old March 13, 2008, 02:39 PM   #9
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Yes... the cornered cat is a MUST read before she gets to handle the pistol empty. I am in Defuniak Springs. The only thing about martial arts i think she could use is situational awareness issues. Other than that... Bri ain't a boxer but she won't stand still for a whoopin' either. She has no interest in the athletic requirement of martial arts... Yes you are right about the types of civilians here... A southern style smack down would likely occur if a staged assault were attempted. No I do not want charges against me or a friend. I will also assure you that if she thought it were a "test" she would try her best to pass and the go-nads of the buddy would be at risk! I will take the advice from here and inform her that the possibility of a "test" has been removed from the table and any assault is REAL...
Brent
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Old March 13, 2008, 04:23 PM   #10
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Quote:
Such as having an acquaintance follow her to the car while at the store, have some one pounce at her who has laid in wait at her car.
I get these flashes of the Pink Panther movies, Peter Sellers had a orientel guy working for him would do this at the worst moment to do so in public could get someone hurt or jailed. Do it on your own property or send he to a school for defensive training.
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Old March 13, 2008, 05:02 PM   #11
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I think less than a true "shocker" unexpected scenario would be a waste of time. I will likely pay for one of the better classes or better yet host the instructor so her class is free. But the pouncing attacker in public is just out of the question... I know if I witnessed such an attack the poor guy would be hospitalized no matter who's daughter was getting training.... I think intentional plain ol' walks with the lesson being just awareness is a big step in the right direction. Physical self defense, martial arts type maneuvers is surely beneficial but I prefer my daughter limit these skills by being aware enough to stop or stand off the assault from further than arms reach. I may not be saying this right so please forgive me if I sound like I am wanting either a trigger happy shooter or a daughter too lazy to fight thus choosing to shoot. I would like to know she makes a good call on threat level and chooses only to shoot when it is an obvious self defense situation. most important I want an aware daughter capable of self defense. Safety is a must with any gun. But I do not want to get word that my little jewel was the victim of violent crime.
On a side note she seen a commercial for a John Stossel special that will point out that parents have 2 standards with regard to teens and sex. Boys are just sowing their oats but daughters are held to a different standard. She pointed out that junior, while 17, had a tryst and was later accused of bein' a future daddy (lucky for him it did not come to fruition) and momma approached it like "well son what are you gonna do" Brianna said "What if I came home and said I may be pregnant?" I gave her the grin she understands so well and said "Simple... I would say honey, Give the feller a call, we need to have a talk..." She said "SEE MOMMA DADDY WOULD KILL HIM...!!!"
Brent
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Old March 14, 2008, 09:39 AM   #12
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Another very strong recommendation for www.corneredcat.com . It is a site written by a VERY savvy lady about women and guns. She is a darned good writer as well and there is lots of info in her site that is good for men as well as women. Check it out.
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Old March 14, 2008, 10:05 AM   #13
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Depending on where you are located, see what free training the local PD or SO offers. There is a program for women/ younger people called R.A.D. That stands for Rape Aggression Defense. Don't let the name throw you though. The course offers good, simple, effective hand to hand training. More importantly, it spends A LOT of time discussing situaltional awareness, how not to be a victim, etc. At the end, there are several scenarios to test skills learned. It is free, you can go often to refresh your skills, etc. No men, except for instructors are allowed.

I cannot say enough good stuff about the program. When my daughter is old enough, she will go. There is a RAD kids program for the younger crowd as well.
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Old March 14, 2008, 12:07 PM   #14
Raytracer
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You mean like:


You'll note, it seldom worked out well for Inspector Clouseau either.

I agree that staged mock attacks are a profoundly bad idea, but simple, constant coaching when you're with her will ingrain a good foundation of situational awareness.

"Don't walk between cars, honey."

"Quick, tell me what's around that corner you're about to cross. Ok, then move move out far enough so you can see."

Half way into Walmart: "Without looking, tell me how many people are behind us and where, in general, they are."

Tell friends and family that if they see her out and about, to try and get the drop on her. Don't fake mug her, just come up behind and try and get within her safety zone and greet her loudly. It'll get the point across.

You're to be commended for taking such a proactive approach in preparing your little girl to take on the world!

Good luck,
Joe
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Old March 14, 2008, 12:41 PM   #15
hogdogs
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Thanks joe,
Yeah I am shocked at the utter lack of awareness of citizens. Call me mean but I get a hoot out of dropping those alarm thingys in peoples purse, jacket pocket in walmart... Kind of a reverse pocket picker I am sure that a vast majority of citizens will tell you they have never seen a shooting star. I am also positive (I took part in some surveys) that the majority are not aware of the weather outside accurately within 30 seconds of entering a building. If you are aware of your own safety needs you also get to see shooting stars and blue skies. How cool is that.
Yes the commentary approach sounds like my best bet, I just kinda think it is gonna be easy to bore the heck out of her until she realizes it is both fun and busy to be aware...
Brent
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Old March 14, 2008, 11:58 PM   #16
Raytracer
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Quote:
Call me mean but I get a hoot out of dropping those alarm thingys in peoples purse, jacket pocket in walmart...
Ohhhh. Karma's gonna get you!

Did'ya ever see that Penn & Teller bit where Teller kept rolling a whole pocket of ball bearings throught the metal detector as Penn was trying to go through? Hysterical.

Joe
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Old March 15, 2008, 12:27 AM   #17
hogdogs
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I don't even look back when them dang alarms go off if i exit... I don't steal so they don't pertain to me... let some "loss prevention tech" put his hands upon my person and we will have us a little rumble... I had to quit putting the alarm thingys in momma's purse or on the frame of OUR cart cuz these loss prevention techs were endangering their life when they grab her by the shoulder with one hand and her purse with the other... I shoulda never taught her to use the back side of the upper arm (right above the elbow) as a blunt force trauma device... Their insurance is sorry at Wal-mart and momma ends up with blood all over her clothes...
Brent
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