Stay at home mom crisis plan

[Verbal Clint]

To stay at home moms and husbands with wives that do the same:

I would like to get your input on a home defense plan. I've been thinking a out it off and on, but it seems like there are no good options, as the thought of any intruder in my house while I'm not there just makes me want to flip out.

My wife and I have 3 kids (Daughters - 7 and newborn, son - 2) and are moving the family to a nice suburb outside of Houston (Pine Mill Ranch in Katy). My wife will be staying home with the kids during the day while I work about 30 mins away. We will have an alarm, but I don't expect my wife to keep it set every second while she's home, because that adds to paranoia, and it's useless if you have to walk outside for even a second. Our house is 2-story, and since the game and media rooms are upstairs, along with the kids' bedrooms, I imagine they'll all be up there 90% of the time. Unfortunately, that 10% of the time when she runs down to cook lunch or get laundry or whatever, it can be a really gray area.

I think I just walked myself through a plan while typing this post (sorry, I'm a scatterbrained engineer), but what do some of y'all do about these situations? It helps to combine fresh eyes with trained minds, so let's hear some ideas!

[JimmyR]

My wife and I live in a 2 bedroom apartment. We have front and back doors, and our plan is to escape if able to- our lives are worth more than our stuff- and call police. If one or both of us are upstairs alone (I work 3rd shift, she works days), then the plan is to bunker down in our bedroom at the top of the stairs, call 911, and advise the person that we are armed, and they are NOT to come up the stairs. All our weapons are kept in our bedroom, including her S&W 19, my carry piece (depending on the day), a shotgun, and a 10/22. If there is any need for either of us to investigate, we proceed armed, and very cautiously, with weapon and flashlight.

[ChaperallCat]

kids are worse then puppies, they cant follow directions, go where they want no matter what. itll make chasing greased pigs seem like getting the mail.

[allaroundhunter]

First off, get yourself a good sized dog. Dobermans are great dogs for this purpose. They are big, alert, protective, and absolutely great with children.

[45Gunner]

It is important to have a "battle plan", designed for when you are home and when you are not. The most important thing is to have a "safe room" where you can (or your wife) gather up all the kidlets and lock the door. Call 911. Don't go out looking for trouble. Material things can be replaced and hopefully you are insured. If your wife is home without you, a good shotgun is advisable.
As a matter of fact, if the situation arises, a good shotgun is a good plan for you also. If the family is hunkered down in the safe room and it is being breached by the not so good guys, blast away. Make sure you are on the phone with 911 and keep them updated on what is going on. A tape recording of what is happening will go a long way in saving you tons of legal fees. Above all, the mission is to protect the family and keep yourself in one piece while doing it.

[Al Thompson]

First step, IMHO, is to sit down with your wife and talk this through. You'll need her buy in for anything to be effective.

Second step, again IMHO, is to work on hardening your perimeter. Your doors should be able to resist forced entry and many doors are a weak spot. Garages are also problem areas - some folks leave the remote controls in their unlocked vehicles. Don't be those folks.

Once you get the perimeter hardened, start walking your selves through the software side of things - actions on contact as it were. As 45gunner points out, one adult, two adults home gives you different options.

As a slight caveat, I'd probably spend a bit more time working on fire drills that home invasion plans. I've known several folks who have had major house fires, but no one who had their door kicked in. Just my opinion...

[g.willikers]

Life would be easier with a one room cabin.
With a two story house, how about a safe room on each floor?
During the day aren't the seven year olds in school?

[BigD_in_FL]

Lots of things can be easily done - obviously, good locks on all openings; thorny bushes - roses, berries, etc, under every window; good dog or two; camera system and alarm service; etc.

I lived in Houston WAY back several decades ago and Katy was a distant suburb that was fairly safe; it still is from what I understand from a friend who lives in Sugarland - if it isn't, move someplace else. Once you have all of your defenses put in place, you need to let some of the paranoia go or the stress will cause you and your family more harm

[g.willikers]

And drill it into wife and kids, not to automatically open the door just because someone is knocking or ringing the door bell.
Probably more home invasions are due to an open door, rather than one that was kicked in.

[Skadoosh]

We will have an alarm, but I don't expect my wife to keep it set every second while she's home, because that adds to paranoia, and it's useless if you have to walk outside for even a second.

Think about this for more than a second: 1) How does setting an alarm add to paranoia any more than checking and maintaining fresh batteries in your smoke alarms or locking the doors on your car and home? 2) Wouldn't a sounding alarm at the very least notify your wife if someone gained entry into the house while she is outside?

Perhaps her viewing this recent news clip video would help in her to 'buy in':
http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?se...sey&id=9150753

[kraigwy]

Find someone to deals with ladies SD classes and set down and voice your concerns with them. Hard to say here because all situations are different.

I do such training. I set the lady down and go over her daily activities. I have them draw a sketch of their home, describe their car, and how they move about with their kids, are we talking toddlers, babies in carriages etc.

Then gear the training based on what they've told me. You'd be surprised how different similar people are, and their needs are different.

I'm a firm believer in constant carry on ones person. A gun in a lock box in the bedroom is useless during a home invasion while you're in the kitchen cooking dinner. A gun in the car is useless when you have a toddler in hand at the ATM, or while pushing a baby carriage through a grocery store or mall parking lot.

If the gun is on your person, there isn't much of a chance of small kids getting a hold of it.

When was the last time you seen someone teaching "drawing from a diaper bag while playing tug of war with the bandit having hold of your stroller?

But if you're middle age with teenagers you really don't need for that, so find something that applies to your situation.

Another thing, check the newspaper, police calls, etc. and find out what type of crimes occur in your town.

In checking the news, seems home invasions and car jacking's are popping up across the country, in "safe" communities like Clark, north of Cody WY where three were killed in a home invasion because two kids wanted their 'benz.

Some people you can't tell anything, I have a daughter like that, she got her CCW, got extra training to go with it, then left her gun in the car while she hunkered down in the back office of a pet store at the Clackamas Town Center during an active shooting situation.

She did every thing right, hunkered down and waited. Except she had no way to protect herself if the shooter would have entered the pet store because her gun was in her car. And in active shooting you have to worry about bandits or police popping in, be prepared to display your firearm or empty hands.

Safe to say her daddy chewed some butt.

All guns are useless if not available. There is no one who can't find the proper means for THEM to carry constantly.

[kraigwy]

As to alarms and dogs, nice but useless when you're dragging your kids through the mall or Micky Dees.

My daughter has alarms all over the house, with camera's. She can hunker down in the bed room and watch the activities through out her house while on the phone guiding the police to the bandit that entered her house.

Didn't work out for her at the Clackamas Town Center.

[Tactical Jackalope]

Alarms, dogs, and reinforced doors, windows, locks, etc.

No if that is all breached and seconds matter, like we saw recently in New Jersey where that woman was getting beat up for 3 minutes straight. What to do then?

Get her a gun, make sure she knows how to us it. ie: a class. Actual instructors teaching her how to fight. Not just shoot, but fight. Keyword to gunfight is "fight". Distance can be cleared very quickly in a home invasion. That gun in the bedroom when you're in the kitchen does you no good.

People call it (and me) paranoid. But my gun is on my person ALL the time. Only time it isn't is when I'm showering or sleeping, and then it's only a foot away from me.

Unfortunately that's just the world we live in today. Even a head buried in the sand can get chopped off. Some people chose to see what they want. I rather prepare for the most I can in my power.

[redhologram]

I carry on my person at all times, unless I am in the shower (then it is still near by) or if I am sleeping, then it is in my Desantis pocket holster on my nightstand within hands reach. I sleep with my bedroom door locked so I do not worry about my kids coming in during the night. If I get up during the night, it goes into my front pocket on my robe.
Putting my gun on every day is as natural as putting on my shirt and shoes. No, I am not worried about my kids bothering it, because it is on me. I carry with it locked and cocked, 7+1.
You and your wife both need to check out Pax's website http://corneredcat.com she speaks from experience in a very similar situation of being home a lot with young children and why she made the decision to carry on body. She is an absolutely phenomenal resource.

[Alabama Shooter]

I am trying to imagine a threat where somone will get up the stairs and bypass the one adult in the house to commit some kind of crime. Drawing a blank.

[ClydeFrog]

This topic is a surprise to me that a person would post such specific personal details on a open source forum.
I wouldn't do it, but that's just me.
As for home protection plans, I'd suggest checking www.NRA.org www.DeltaPress.com www.Paladinpress.com www.glockstore.com www.gunvideo.com .
Books videos & instruction from respected sources can guide you to set up security plans.

Firearms or weapons are only a part of the plan. Lighting, access control, passwords or duress codes, back up or plan Bs, CCTVs/video systems, etc are important too.

Stay safe but be smart.

CF

[JimmyR]

Originally Posted by ClydeFrog

This topic is a surprise to me that a person would post such specific personal details on a open source forum.
I wouldn't do it, but that's just me.

One of many reasons I keep my location hidden on forums...

[myusername]

Most of the above is good advice. But really come on, "Katy" isn't exactly the ghetto. Unless you are a jeweler or hiding from the mob a home invasion is unlikely. Certainly a one in a million event can happen, it does all the time, so reasonable preparations and training will serve you well but don't forget why you moved there in the first place.

[pax]

Yeah, those things never happen in broad daylight in good neighborhoods....

Or do they? http://www.corneredcat.com/home-invasion-2/

pax

[Skadoosh]

Excellent read, pax.

[redhologram]

Originally Posted by Pax

Yeah, those things never happen in broad daylight in good neighborhoods....

Or do they? http://www.corneredcat.com/home-invasion-2/

pax

This is the exactly what popped in my mind when I first read and posted to this thread the other day.
Kathy, I'm glad you posted the link to that piece you wrote on just the other day. When I saw that, it confirmed even more as to why I carry on body, at home, even with an alarm.
That shows, once again, when seconds count, help is minutes away. ( problem is, how many minutes and what will you, and possibly your family, have to endure before help arrives.
My son was 8yrs old, he is almost 14 now, he saw me being attacked and beaten (by someone we knew), he slipped off, hid under my desk and called 911. (This was before I started carrying, obviously). The physical injuries were much easier to heal than the psychological aspect of feeling so helpless and unable to protect yourself and your child. The impact it had on him as well. To this day, he is very protective of me, doesn't want me anywhere alone, or out after dark, regardless of the fact I am armed.

[kraigwy]

Everyone talks about home evasions, which is good. Have you gun on you not near you.

But what if you aren't home? Just read recently where a lady was in Walmart, (OK somewhere) and some guy reached into her shopping cart and removed a toddler.

He held a knife to the toddlers' throat threatening to kill it. After a while a cop showed up and shot the bandit saving the child.

Like way too many people, if the mother had had a gun she probably would have left it in her car.

http://www.news9.com/story/22714568/...-walmart-store

As I said, a gun is useless unless it's available.

Add that to Pax's link, plus the thousands more like it in the news.

Some people say I'm paranoid, maybe so, guess I'm paranoid when I use my seat belts too. Never needed them but I still wear them.............yup I guess I'm paranoid.

[Skadoosh]

The widespread viewing of the video of the Millburn, NJ home invasion and brutal beating in front of the young child, may have been a wake up call for many....and a starkly contrasting watershed event to counter the anti-gun rhetoric that were invigorated by the Aurora and Newtown tragedies.

[Dwight55]

At the very least, . . .

1. Harden all entrance doors with deadbolt plus knob lock. Seldom used doors can also benefit from one of those large surface deadbolts.

2. Teach everyone to keep the doors locked when you are gone or all inside. We even lock up when we are going mowing, . . . gardening, . . . to the shed, . . . etc. as a walk in can do just that if the door is unlocked.

3. Get an alarm system. The sign in the yard us usually the most important part of the system, . . . it will deter some, . . . send others to another house.

4. Teach everyone to NEVER answer the door without mom or dad present, . . . period, . . . NO exceptions.

Not everyone can do the dog thing (allergies, etc.), . . . not everyone can afford a hardened safe room, . . . but these you can do, . . . and they go a long way to deter or prevent many of the opportunistic robberies.

May God bless,
Dwight

[Onward Allusion]

Verbal Clint
Stay at home mom crisis plan
<SNIP>My wife and I have 3 kids (Daughters - 7 and newborn, son - 2) and are moving the family to a nice suburb outside of Houston<SNIP>. My wife will be staying home with the kids during the day while I work<SNIP>. We will have an alarm<SNIP>...<SNIP>

Like some others have pointed out; a gun is of no use if you can't get to it. Also, having little ones around, getting to a secured gun is harder. Have your wife wear the gun while at home. I've said this so many times that I'm sick of hearing myself but I carry a mouse gun at home (P32) to let me get to a bigger gun elsewhere in my home. My wife does the same. I carry mine pretty much during all waking hours. It is so unobtrusive that I do not know it is there 90%+ of the time. Also, 99%+ of the time, no one else knows you are carrying either.

As for having an alarm system and not having it armed, I ask - WHY? That's the purpose of an alarm system, even during the day while one is at home. If one is outside on their property, then refer back to my 1st paragraph.

Wearing a gun allows your wife to not worry about the kids getting into anything. It also allows her to get to her gun immediately. It's also pretty darn hard for a rugrat to take it from her w/o her knowledge.

BTW, I suggest redacting some of the details you've written in your post.