friend gives me crap for carrying all the time...

Erikbal · February 26, 2012, 03:38 PM

I live in a small city with a population of around 14,000. For such a small city it still has its share of crime and we are only 70 miles south of Buffalo and get a lot of thugs that come down here from there. My friend, who also has a pistol permit and owns a glock 19 and a 22, has never carried the entire ten years I've known him. I got my permit last Sept and got my pistol Jan 9th and have been carrying on a regular basis since then, hence a big reason why I bought a small compact 380 as my first pistol. He gives me crap and says it's ridiculous to carry in this small city and uncalled for and that basically I am being over paranoid and there's no point to carry unless I go somewhere where it's called for. I've already told him the whole "I'd rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it" and he basically just kind of shakes his head and laughs. Any of you guys ever deal with this grief or anything? Do you have any friends that ever do this to you? Quite honestly the chances of me ever needing my gun are slim, which I am happy about, but I am not HURTING OR BOTHERING anything or anyone by carrying it when nobody even knows, ya know what I mean?

Sparks1957 · February 26, 2012, 03:46 PM

People that matter don't judge and people who judge don't matter, as an old mentor of mine used to say.

Why are you placing such importance on this guy's opinion of you? Follow your heart and ignore him.

Bloodbought1 · February 26, 2012, 03:47 PM

I would do as I wanted and not let him get to me. The day may come when you bail his hind end out......Never know. Some folks will never understand why you want to be prepared.

KC Rob · February 26, 2012, 03:49 PM

This is a friend? I might look into getting new friends.

One of my Sister-in-law's gave me grief about it several years ago, said I was paranoid and the odds of me needing it were very small. I asked her if she wore her seat belt every time she drove or just on the days she planned on being in an accident because the odds of her needing it were very small. That flustered her and some of her other siblings goofed on her when she tried to stammer a retort, so she just stomped off. She and I get along by just not talking to each other now.

Bob M. · February 26, 2012, 03:55 PM

Quote:

I asked her if she wore her seat belt every time she drove or just on the days she planned on being in an accident because the odds of her needing it were very small.

Perfect!!! Hahahahahaa

Kreyzhorse · February 26, 2012, 04:01 PM

You choose to carry, your friend does not, to each his own. Ignore your friend or take his advice and stop carrying. To me, the answer is pretty clear.

shortwave · February 26, 2012, 04:02 PM

...and this bothers you why???

armoredman · February 26, 2012, 04:09 PM

Yes, all the time, especially co-workers, which considering I've spent 10 years working the prison system is especially disconcerting. I learned to simply tune them out.
One time on the way home, while dropping off an officer in a dark lonely parking lot, we saw a van that had followed us for short while drive up nearby in this vast, deserted parking lot. I watched the vehicle while the officer got to her car and left, then pulled out with the van as the other vehicle made a U-turn and sped away. One co-worker said shakily, "Guess you might get to use your gun, eh?"
I said, "Hope not, paperwork is a pain."
And the next day they STILL gave me grief.
There are those who will make fun of you for not behaving the same way as everyone else. Ignore them.

OEF-Vet · February 26, 2012, 04:21 PM

My wife (we both are carry permitted) ribbed me about.

"Why do you want to take that thing to a family event anyway? You're not going to need it there."

Well, (I replied) because they are the people I most want to be prepared to protect...

Deutscher · February 26, 2012, 04:41 PM

"Well, (I replied) because they are the people I most want to be prepared to protect..."

Great answer!!!

**Mike Irwin** · February 26, 2012, 05:13 PM

How tough was it getting a carry permit in New York?

Sharpsdressed Man · February 26, 2012, 05:27 PM

Ask him if he has insurance on his car, or life insurance. Packing a gun is the same thing, only you are supplying your OWN insurance. You might also mention that if he feels uncomfortable with a handgun, he should not mock people who are self reliant, and capable with a handgun. I always tell people I am there to protect them, and there is no need to thank me. That usually shuts them up.

Erikbal · February 26, 2012, 05:32 PM

It doesn't really bother me that much and he's my best friend and all. He's not mean about it just thinks it's silly. Then we've got another friend who has over 30 guns and always has at least one pistol on him. It wasn't too bad to get it, I had to pay 5 bucks for the application, call the Sheriffs office and make an appointment and go up there and get my picture taken and finger printed and all and pay 120 bucks then just wait if you get it good if you don't you're out 120 bucks. They said it's normally a 3 month wait but they were backed up, I got mine in about 3 1/2 months. If they have any questions or anything they'll call you and have you do an interview with the under sheriff. I have a perfectly clean record so had no problems. The bigger pain in the ass is when I purchase a pistol the store has to do a background check, then I've gotta drive a half hour to the county sherrifs office and pay them 3 bucks and have them put the pistol on my permit then go back to the gun shop and they'll release the gun to me. The permits are a joke too they're printed on like special paper and when you get a pistol put on it they use a typewriter and type it onto the permit. I'm going to get my PA permit soon too cuz I live 10 mins from the border and it covers other states, that one you walk in and walk out with it and it's under 30 bucks. The one nice thing about NY is it's good for life you never have to renew it, which is how it should be since it's so expensive! Oh and I forgot on the application you have to have 4 character references sign for you, all of mine had permits as well which isn't necessary but can't hurt.

SHNOMIDO · February 26, 2012, 05:36 PM

Turn it around on him-

Why do you care that I'm carrying?

Are you planning on doing something bad to me and want my guard down?

Does it bother you that i have a gun? do you wish i couldn't carry a gun?

are you intimidated that i carry? are you jealous? are you scared?

Now, none of this is serious, but its a way to make him realize hes being silly. Its like if he found out you wear thong underwear. Might be a bit weird, but its none of his business.

Why do you care what kind of underwear i wear? do you plan on seeing me in my underwear a lot? do you spy on me in the bathroom? does it turn you on?

Same thing. just make him feel uncomfortable that hes so much in your business.

arentol · February 26, 2012, 05:48 PM

Do you keep a fire extinguisher in the kitchen and have fire alarms on your ceiling? Why? Odds are you will never need them.

Why do common people get trained in CPR? Odds are they will never need it.

Do you know the Heimlich Maneuver? Why? Odds are you will never have to use it.

Do you think a Cnet editor from Southern California would have any need to keep an emergency survival kit in his car so he wouldn't die after getting stuck in a snowstorm with his family in a remote section of Oregon? Neither did this guy, but look what happened to him:

http://news.cnet.com/James-Kim-found...3-6141498.html

The point is, we all do things to prepare for horrible situations that will probably never happen, and many people fail to make the simplest of preparations for bad situations that do end up happening to them. In the grand scheme of things carrying a firearm is actually extremely easy to do and prepares you for a very large number of possible bad situations. Why not?

scsov509 · February 26, 2012, 05:55 PM

I believe Clint Smith answered this best saying, "If you carry a gun, people will call you paranoid. That's ridiculous. If I have a gun, what in the hell do I have to be paranoid about?"

My sister called me paranoid once and said I must be expecting to get into a lot of trouble if I felt I needed to carry a gun all the time. I explained that if I indeed expected trouble then I'd carry a rifle and take seven friends. Seriously, it just comes with the territory. You gotta ignore and move on. However, under no circumstances should you compromise your convictions to accommodate others' comfort.

Dwight55 · February 26, 2012, 07:37 PM

Some people wonder why I carry.

Other people wonder why I go to church.

Still other people wonder why I sometimes dress up like a 1st Century Roman Centurion.

And of course others just look at me and wonder.

I got em all guessing, . . . life is fun

May God bless,
Dwight

Coach Z · February 26, 2012, 07:38 PM

I got a chuckle out of the seatbelt / insurance type comments but it's really spot on. Now that I carry all the time I'm that much more conscious to stay away from anywhere that I think it's likely that I'll need a gun because I don't want to deal with the paperwork of a defensive shoot!

OnTheFly · February 26, 2012, 07:43 PM

If he's not giving you big bear hugs or watching you undress, then there is no need for him to know. Concealed IS concealed as they say. Just tell him, "Yeah, you have a point" as if you are going to stop, but continue doing what you think is right.

Fly

Wishoot · February 26, 2012, 07:43 PM

Bad things happen in Smalltown America too. I don't care where you live, evil lurks everywhere.

Carry your gun.

UtopiaTexasG19 · February 26, 2012, 07:52 PM

I've carried for over 35 years and only my wife knows that I do. IMHO if you carry properly no one can give you a problem because they don't know that you do carry.

stu925 · February 26, 2012, 08:07 PM

Quote:

The permits are a joke too they're printed on like special paper and when you get a pistol put on it they use a typewriter and type it onto the permit.

Ulster County has gone to an ID card style permit, it's actually 2 cards 1 is the permit and the second card is a list of guns on the permit. Add a new handgun, get a new card. Check with your local Pistol Permit Dept. to find out if you can keep your permit if you move out of state, last I heard Ulster was the only county left that allowed it you just need to change your address. In response to your question, my wife used to ask me why I thought I needed to carry until I started pointing out ex-cons and gang bangers to her when we were out and about, she doesn't ask any more.

Stu

m&p45acp10+1 · February 26, 2012, 08:12 PM

Paranoid? What do I need to paranoid about? I am carrying two guns.

krunchnik · February 26, 2012, 08:17 PM

Bad guys dont know any boundaries,good neighborhoods,wealthy ,poor,crime follows people everywhere.Thats why I got my permit.you never know when or where.And along with my permit I stay armed,in a bad situation it just evens the odds.

jad0110 · February 26, 2012, 08:45 PM

The odds of a house fire are low, so therefore why bother with fire alarms? One word: consequences. Like not have a gun when you really need one, the consequences of not having fire alarms in the event of a fire is severe.

OTH, the concequences of not having pocket change for a Krispy Kreme donut when the hot light is on is slightly less severe.

February 26, 2012, 03:38 PM	#1
Erikbal Senior Member Join Date: January 12, 2012 Location: Olean, NY Posts: 375	friend gives me crap for carrying all the time... I live in a small city with a population of around 14,000. For such a small city it still has its share of crime and we are only 70 miles south of Buffalo and get a lot of thugs that come down here from there. My friend, who also has a pistol permit and owns a glock 19 and a 22, has never carried the entire ten years I've known him. I got my permit last Sept and got my pistol Jan 9th and have been carrying on a regular basis since then, hence a big reason why I bought a small compact 380 as my first pistol. He gives me crap and says it's ridiculous to carry in this small city and uncalled for and that basically I am being over paranoid and there's no point to carry unless I go somewhere where it's called for. I've already told him the whole "I'd rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it" and he basically just kind of shakes his head and laughs. Any of you guys ever deal with this grief or anything? Do you have any friends that ever do this to you? Quite honestly the chances of me ever needing my gun are slim, which I am happy about, but I am not HURTING OR BOTHERING anything or anyone by carrying it when nobody even knows, ya know what I mean? __________________ S&W Bodyguard 380 Ruger SR9C

February 26, 2012, 03:47 PM	#3
Bloodbought1 Junior Member Join Date: December 22, 2008 Location: St. Joseph,TN Posts: 9	I would do as I wanted and not let him get to me. The day may come when you bail his hind end out......Never know. Some folks will never understand why you want to be prepared. __________________ Life is short enjoy every moment of it.

February 26, 2012, 03:49 PM	#4
KC Rob Senior Member Join Date: January 3, 2009 Location: Outside KC, MO Posts: 321	This is a friend? I might look into getting new friends. One of my Sister-in-law's gave me grief about it several years ago, said I was paranoid and the odds of me needing it were very small. I asked her if she wore her seat belt every time she drove or just on the days she planned on being in an accident because the odds of her needing it were very small. That flustered her and some of her other siblings goofed on her when she tried to stammer a retort, so she just stomped off. She and I get along by just not talking to each other now. __________________ KC Rob

February 26, 2012, 04:01 PM	#6
Kreyzhorse Senior Member Join Date: April 12, 2006 Location: NKY Posts: 12,463	You choose to carry, your friend does not, to each his own. Ignore your friend or take his advice and stop carrying. To me, the answer is pretty clear. __________________ "He who laughs last, laughs dead." Homer Simpson

February 26, 2012, 04:21 PM	#9
OEF-Vet Senior Member Join Date: October 23, 2011 Location: Backwoods, PA Posts: 284	My wife (we both are carry permitted) ribbed me about. "Why do you want to take that thing to a family event anyway? You're not going to need it there." Well, (I replied) because they are the people I most want to be prepared to protect... __________________ Jim "If a man does his best, what else is there?" - General George S. Patton Jr

February 26, 2012, 03:46 PM	#2
Sparks1957 Senior Member Join Date: September 4, 2011 Location: Vermont Posts: 1,552	People that matter don't judge and people who judge don't matter, as an old mentor of mine used to say. Why are you placing such importance on this guy's opinion of you? Follow your heart and ignore him.

February 26, 2012, 04:02 PM	#7
shortwave Senior Member Join Date: December 17, 2007 Location: SOUTHEAST, OHIO Posts: 5,970	...and this bothers you why???

February 26, 2012, 04:09 PM	#8
armoredman Senior Member Join Date: May 22, 2007 Location: Arizona Posts: 5,297	Yes, all the time, especially co-workers, which considering I've spent 10 years working the prison system is especially disconcerting. I learned to simply tune them out. One time on the way home, while dropping off an officer in a dark lonely parking lot, we saw a van that had followed us for short while drive up nearby in this vast, deserted parking lot. I watched the vehicle while the officer got to her car and left, then pulled out with the van as the other vehicle made a U-turn and sped away. One co-worker said shakily, "Guess you might get to use your gun, eh?" I said, "Hope not, paperwork is a pain." And the next day they STILL gave me grief. There are those who will make fun of you for not behaving the same way as everyone else. Ignore them.

February 26, 2012, 04:41 PM	#10
Deutscher Member Join Date: July 30, 2011 Location: Bethlehem, PA Posts: 27	"Well, (I replied) because they are the people I most want to be prepared to protect..." Great answer!!!

February 26, 2012, 05:13 PM	#11
Mike Irwin Staff Join Date: April 13, 2000 Location: Northern Virginia Posts: 41,380	How tough was it getting a carry permit in New York? __________________ "The gift which I am sending you is called a dog, and is in fact the most precious and valuable possession of mankind" -Theodorus Gaza Baby Jesus cries when the fat redneck doesn't have military-grade firepower.

February 26, 2012, 05:27 PM	#12
Sharpsdressed Man Junior member Join Date: June 21, 2009 Location: NE Ohio Posts: 1,176	Ask him if he has insurance on his car, or life insurance. Packing a gun is the same thing, only you are supplying your OWN insurance. You might also mention that if he feels uncomfortable with a handgun, he should not mock people who are self reliant, and capable with a handgun. I always tell people I am there to protect them, and there is no need to thank me. That usually shuts them up.

February 26, 2012, 05:32 PM	#13
Erikbal Senior Member Join Date: January 12, 2012 Location: Olean, NY Posts: 375	It doesn't really bother me that much and he's my best friend and all. He's not mean about it just thinks it's silly. Then we've got another friend who has over 30 guns and always has at least one pistol on him. It wasn't too bad to get it, I had to pay 5 bucks for the application, call the Sheriffs office and make an appointment and go up there and get my picture taken and finger printed and all and pay 120 bucks then just wait if you get it good if you don't you're out 120 bucks. They said it's normally a 3 month wait but they were backed up, I got mine in about 3 1/2 months. If they have any questions or anything they'll call you and have you do an interview with the under sheriff. I have a perfectly clean record so had no problems. The bigger pain in the ass is when I purchase a pistol the store has to do a background check, then I've gotta drive a half hour to the county sherrifs office and pay them 3 bucks and have them put the pistol on my permit then go back to the gun shop and they'll release the gun to me. The permits are a joke too they're printed on like special paper and when you get a pistol put on it they use a typewriter and type it onto the permit. I'm going to get my PA permit soon too cuz I live 10 mins from the border and it covers other states, that one you walk in and walk out with it and it's under 30 bucks. The one nice thing about NY is it's good for life you never have to renew it, which is how it should be since it's so expensive! Oh and I forgot on the application you have to have 4 character references sign for you, all of mine had permits as well which isn't necessary but can't hurt. __________________ S&W Bodyguard 380 Ruger SR9C

February 26, 2012, 05:36 PM	#14
SHNOMIDO Senior Member Join Date: June 23, 2011 Location: Illinois Posts: 423	Turn it around on him- Why do you care that I'm carrying? Are you planning on doing something bad to me and want my guard down? Does it bother you that i have a gun? do you wish i couldn't carry a gun? are you intimidated that i carry? are you jealous? are you scared? Now, none of this is serious, but its a way to make him realize hes being silly. Its like if he found out you wear thong underwear. Might be a bit weird, but its none of his business. Why do you care what kind of underwear i wear? do you plan on seeing me in my underwear a lot? do you spy on me in the bathroom? does it turn you on? Same thing. just make him feel uncomfortable that hes so much in your business.

February 26, 2012, 05:48 PM	#15
arentol Senior Member Join Date: December 11, 2011 Posts: 230	Do you keep a fire extinguisher in the kitchen and have fire alarms on your ceiling? Why? Odds are you will never need them. Why do common people get trained in CPR? Odds are they will never need it. Do you know the Heimlich Maneuver? Why? Odds are you will never have to use it. Do you think a Cnet editor from Southern California would have any need to keep an emergency survival kit in his car so he wouldn't die after getting stuck in a snowstorm with his family in a remote section of Oregon? Neither did this guy, but look what happened to him: http://news.cnet.com/James-Kim-found...3-6141498.html The point is, we all do things to prepare for horrible situations that will probably never happen, and many people fail to make the simplest of preparations for bad situations that do end up happening to them. In the grand scheme of things carrying a firearm is actually extremely easy to do and prepares you for a very large number of possible bad situations. Why not?

February 26, 2012, 05:55 PM	#16
scsov509 Senior Member Join Date: November 22, 2006 Posts: 819	I believe Clint Smith answered this best saying, "If you carry a gun, people will call you paranoid. That's ridiculous. If I have a gun, what in the hell do I have to be paranoid about?" My sister called me paranoid once and said I must be expecting to get into a lot of trouble if I felt I needed to carry a gun all the time. I explained that if I indeed expected trouble then I'd carry a rifle and take seven friends. Seriously, it just comes with the territory. You gotta ignore and move on. However, under no circumstances should you compromise your convictions to accommodate others' comfort.

February 26, 2012, 07:37 PM	#17
Dwight55 Senior Member Join Date: June 18, 2004 Location: Central Ohio Posts: 2,568	Some people wonder why I carry. Other people wonder why I go to church. Still other people wonder why I sometimes dress up like a 1st Century Roman Centurion. And of course others just look at me and wonder. I got em all guessing, . . . life is fun May God bless, Dwight __________________ www.dwightsgunleather.com If you can breathe, . . . thank God! If you can read, . . . thank a teacher! If you are reading this in English, . . . thank a Veteran!

February 26, 2012, 07:38 PM	#18
Coach Z Senior Member Join Date: February 18, 2011 Location: RI Posts: 795	I got a chuckle out of the seatbelt / insurance type comments but it's really spot on. Now that I carry all the time I'm that much more conscious to stay away from anywhere that I think it's likely that I'll need a gun because I don't want to deal with the paperwork of a defensive shoot! __________________ Love my guns

February 26, 2012, 07:43 PM	#19
OnTheFly Senior Member Join Date: January 9, 2007 Location: SE Nebraska Posts: 859	If he's not giving you big bear hugs or watching you undress, then there is no need for him to know. Concealed IS concealed as they say. Just tell him, "Yeah, you have a point" as if you are going to stop, but continue doing what you think is right. Fly __________________ I told my wife I was scheduling a mid-life crisis. It was either a Harley or guns. Secretly, I've already decided on guns. :-) Bang... Bang... Bang...

February 26, 2012, 07:43 PM	#20
Wishoot Senior Member Join Date: June 5, 2009 Location: Milwaukee, WI Posts: 1,093	Bad things happen in Smalltown America too. I don't care where you live, evil lurks everywhere. Carry your gun.

February 26, 2012, 07:52 PM	#21
UtopiaTexasG19 Senior Member Join Date: July 3, 2011 Location: S.E. Texas Gulf Coast Posts: 743	I've carried for over 35 years and only my wife knows that I do. IMHO if you carry properly no one can give you a problem because they don't know that you do carry.

February 26, 2012, 08:12 PM	#23
m&p45acp10+1 Senior Member Join Date: May 3, 2009 Location: Central Texas Posts: 3,930	Paranoid? What do I need to paranoid about? I am carrying two guns. __________________ No matter how many times you do it and nothing happens it only takes something going wrong one time to kill you.

February 26, 2012, 08:17 PM	#24
krunchnik Senior Member Join Date: October 27, 2010 Location: Lakeland,TN Posts: 220	Bad guys dont know any boundaries,good neighborhoods,wealthy ,poor,crime follows people everywhere.Thats why I got my permit.you never know when or where.And along with my permit I stay armed,in a bad situation it just evens the odds. __________________ THE CROW

February 26, 2012, 08:45 PM	#25
jad0110 Senior Member Join Date: May 30, 2007 Posts: 761	The odds of a house fire are low, so therefore why bother with fire alarms? One word: consequences. Like not have a gun when you really need one, the consequences of not having fire alarms in the event of a fire is severe. OTH, the concequences of not having pocket change for a Krispy Kreme donut when the hot light is on is slightly less severe.