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September 28, 2005, 02:08 PM | #1 |
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Join Date: January 16, 2002
Location: alaska
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maybe i'm NOT so tactical it hurts? maybe it just hurts to be me?
auuugghhh! here i am sitting at my desk and my gun is in a drawer. man, what would i do if the mailman lost his marbles and came in shooting? not enough space to do a tac-roll to the drawer. and i'm not tactical enough to carry a BUG. i might be able to distract the shooter with my surefire, and i've been working on my reflexes so i might be able to dodge the first two shots (i watch the Matrix at least once a week).
what do you all suggest i do?
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September 28, 2005, 02:29 PM | #2 |
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Call your combat lawyer - they are invincibly armoured and one shot killers!!
Ok, I'll play before we get locked down for being bad!
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September 28, 2005, 02:33 PM | #3 |
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Look at me...I work in a gun shop...a high threat environment...and all I carry is....
a 32!!!! Yikes! And tactical rolls? All I got is around the waist rolls...I got more rolls than an Italian bakery! Im Wildalaska and I am a tactical poseur! WildsobsobnsobAlaska |
September 28, 2005, 02:34 PM | #4 |
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Maybe you could hide behind your sturdy brand safe. I hear they are made with 3 feet of solid steel and can withstand a direct nuclear attack!!
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September 28, 2005, 02:38 PM | #5 | ||
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Quote:
Quote:
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"Every man alone is sincere; at the entrance of a second person hypocrisy begins." - Ralph Waldo Emerson "People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use." - Soren Kierkegaard |
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September 28, 2005, 02:38 PM | #6 |
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sad AND pathetic... a great combination...
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September 28, 2005, 02:38 PM | #7 |
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Location: Idaho
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Dude, didn't you ever watch "Tool Time?" Or the Red Green show?
Get yourself a cheap Kydex holster for your pistol. Use JB Weld (tactical adhesive) to glue it to the side of your desk. Or use duct tape (the Handyman's secret weapon.) When you get to work, take you pistol from your tactical IWB holster and holster it on your desk. Instant access. If WildAlaska or the powers that be won't let you glue a holster to your desk, just get a double-wide hanging folder. Label it "SHTF", and "file" your handgun in it in your file drawer. Next problem?
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September 28, 2005, 02:49 PM | #8 |
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Heehee...ya'll make an easy fix relatively hard...
It's called industrial velcro. JB Weld and duct tale is a good idea, but once the holster is attached, it's attached. Depending on what kind of desk you have. the underside where your knees and feet go are the perfect place. More than likely, in that situation, you are going to duck anywho....most people go for the most available place within sight range...i.e. under their desks. But you, my dear apple, have the worm. Right a knees felt and hands grasp, is your trusty side arm,. removable by night, holster and all, and attached by day. Even reachable without causing attention to yourself. Shan
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September 28, 2005, 02:56 PM | #9 |
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not enough space to do a tac-roll to the drawer
However, it would be sad and pathetic to do a tootsie roll in your drawers. I actually read about strong men doing the tactical tootsie in emergencies. In fact, emergency cleaning stations are set up (and not mentioned that much), to deal with the tactical tootsie after some disaster or giant shoot'em up.
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September 28, 2005, 03:12 PM | #10 |
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I get the feeling that spacemanspiff is bored today.
Personally I would used the dreaded paperclip slingshot to neutralize the attacker. One shot to the eye drops em on the ground every time! Then you have time to open the drawer and throw down...or is that throw up? Depends on the situation I guess... :barf: |
September 28, 2005, 03:42 PM | #11 |
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I hear tactical rolls go well with logistical coffee. Anyway, you could use the electric stapler on your desk, as long as it's registered with the ATF as full auto .
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September 28, 2005, 04:05 PM | #12 |
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Witchhunt eh? Melikes!
Well if it is the mailmain (Gov), he'll probably have a .40, which is THE ULTIMATE TACTICAL PROJECTILE!!! So your pretty much screwed. Quite frankly I think the Postal service has been involved in dark op collaborations for some time now. Make sure you are wearing your level 30 steel trauma plate vest, even if you do the duct tape safe thing, no such thing as too retar.....uh.....careful....yeah thats it. Sorry couldnt help myself. |
September 28, 2005, 04:48 PM | #13 |
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Sigh... and this is the caliber of people with whom I chose to argue....
I haven't been driven out by intellectuals proving me wrong, but instead by adults talking about pooping their pants.... how disheartening... Well, if my vote even counts here, I'll take the slingshot firing the $10,000 rolex from the rolex board. STill laugh when I think about that.... |
September 28, 2005, 04:53 PM | #14 |
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A stapler... Everyone knows that your standard desktop staplers are way too small a caliber. Those things only have like a 10% OSS percentage, for heavens sake! What you need is a super-industrial pneumatic framing nailer!! I used to carry four on my person at all times... until I sat down one day. Now I carry three and the fourth just kinda hangs there...
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September 28, 2005, 05:46 PM | #15 |
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Join Date: April 18, 2005
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I'd hide behind a copy of Black's
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September 28, 2005, 06:04 PM | #16 |
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What you need is the new Standard Hydraulic Insulating Tactical Suit.
It looks like your ordinary desk. With the quick press of a button, the desk quickly transforms into a full body tactical exoskeleton, capable of sustaining multiple direct hits from a tow missile. The forearm mounted, laser guided gatling guns, and the shoulder mounted rocket pods, quickly eliminate any threat. In addition, the suit is completely self sustaining, keeping its wearer nourished and protected for up to 30 days, be it underwater, or in the vacuum of space. The control interface is unique, turning the slightest THOUGHT of the wearer into instant action. (The exact details of the control systems are classified citizen) S.H.I.T.S. - Don't be caught with your pants down in a tactical situation. Order yours today! Only 600 easy payments of $9,999,999,000.99 |
September 28, 2005, 06:07 PM | #17 |
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er keep the door locked and hide in the washroom!!!
or go home early, so that when the crazies arrive and grease all the coworkers your happily out drinking beers with the buddies..man you gotta learn to plan around these mini calamities.. |
September 28, 2005, 06:20 PM | #18 |
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Judging by how spiff and wildalaska are spending their time on the forums, it must be getting cold in Alaska
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September 28, 2005, 06:24 PM | #19 | |
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Quote:
By the way heres a new trick...bury a gun special in a silly thread...so if anyone wants a Colt Government Stainless NRM 45 for $599 delivered email or call me before 6 pm alaska time, one only WildhavingfunyetAlaska |
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September 28, 2005, 06:26 PM | #20 |
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I dont suppose you could get me and ship a cheap HK 40mm grenade laucher? Need something for Halloween
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September 28, 2005, 06:32 PM | #21 |
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Just for the record-there's ALWAYS room for a tactical roll (TM).
Larry
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September 28, 2005, 06:42 PM | #22 |
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I dont' trust the mailman myself,he is a sneaky fellow.That's why I pick my mail up at the post office.I would go with a coach gun duct taped under the desk ,that should take care of any unwanted junk mail.
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September 28, 2005, 07:00 PM | #23 |
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Location: Virginia
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oh lord
whole bunch people been sniffing the bore cleaner again!!!!!
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September 28, 2005, 07:41 PM | #24 |
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Location: Reynoldsburg, OH
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Geesh, don't you tactical gurus know anything? It's all about shot placement. This is the ultimate one-shot-stopper:
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