August 27, 2012, 11:06 AM | #1 |
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Heads Butting
My wife and I have really different views on concealed carry. She thinks that since their aren't any registered sex offenders in our close vicinity I shouldn't carry often. To sum it up she only wants me to carry when im by myself. She knows im very passionate about the situation but really doesn't care. Anyone else in this situation? Any pointers would be helpful.
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August 27, 2012, 11:23 AM | #2 |
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Well, I hate to suggest logic, but have you asked her why she cares whether you carry or not while you're together? Is she in some way being harmed when you carry around her?
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August 27, 2012, 11:24 AM | #3 |
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If I understand correctly she does not want you to carry when you are with her. Correct? I guess you could ask her specifically why she feels that way. Is she embarrassed that you carry? Is she afraid of the actual gun? If you knew specifically why she did not want you to carry maybe you could address the issue. Also, sorry, but I’m not sure I totally understood the part about the sex offenders.
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August 27, 2012, 11:45 AM | #4 |
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This is really something best discussed in Tactics and Training.
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August 27, 2012, 11:47 AM | #5 |
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Is she concerned that you'd be attacked by a registered sex offender?
Tell her the gun serves the same purpose as an automobile's seat belt. The chance of actually needing it is small. However, it could save her life. |
August 27, 2012, 12:23 PM | #6 | |
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From my book, The Cornered Cat: A Woman's Guide to Concealed Carry:
Quote:
When and to the extent that you do talk about it, focus on specific safety concerns and remember you aren't asking permission. Ask, "Where do you think is the best place to put the safe?" for example, rather than, "Will you let me get a firearm if I keep it in a safe?" pax |
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August 27, 2012, 12:37 PM | #7 |
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We do have a 2 year old daughter and any logical person would think that a sex offender would be a legitimate threat. She enjoys shooting somewhat when we can get away. She is just uncomfortable with guns around. She even admits that im safe with them. It would help if she wasn't smarter than me.
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August 27, 2012, 01:05 PM | #8 | |
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But as to your issue, I have the same issue with my own lady. She could care less if I carry while out and about solo, but I tend to get the "evil eye" when I do so while we are together. She actually refuses to let me in her car armed - meaning I drive everywhere. My solution was to start pocket carrying and just not tell her. That worked pretty well up until she got pulled over for rolling a stop sign and I leaned over her to inform the officer that I was armed (OH requires notification). He was appreciative (and even let her slide on the ticket) - she was not
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August 27, 2012, 01:25 PM | #9 |
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I would like to place several guns around the house strategically, keeping the AR or shotgun in the bedroom and several pistols throughout. She shot that down pretty quickly. About the only gun I can slide by her is a j frame. I want a new HK P2000sk but that's a hard one to drive past her.
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You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe—and shudder. James 2:19 "I do not fear the man that practices ten thousand kicks one time, I fear the man that practices one kick ten thousand times." Bruce Lee |
August 27, 2012, 01:30 PM | #10 |
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Just agree with her!!!!
Then tell her you will gladly offer her up to the mugger, rapest, carjacker, ectera and run in stead of defending her. |
August 27, 2012, 01:52 PM | #11 |
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i wouldnt carry when im with her if she would be able to defend me against anything that might come my way. Armed robbery, rapist, attempted homicide, murder whatever. If she cant then let her do her thing and I will defend myself. I have a right too and I feel a husband also has an obligation to defend his wife and children..
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August 27, 2012, 01:52 PM | #12 |
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+1 to Paxs post.
My wife used to be like you describe, not wanting me to carry. So in trying to please her and keep the peace, I left it at home when we would go out together. I felt that I didn't have her permission and did not want to stir anything up between us, so felt that not carrying it was a good decision. One night we're out lollygagging around town and she must have gotten goosebumps or something and suddenly turns to me and says...but you do have your gun, right? Just like that, in a moment, she relinquished her authority (sic) and position about not wanting me to carry, and fully expected me to have it and be able to protect her. Uh-oh...I let her down that night (luckily nothing happened) and was not fully prepared. I learned a valuable lesson. She rightfully expected me to be prepared in spite of household politics. I'm not saying lie to your Wife or to bully her into letting you carry, but rather, there is a higher level of duty to protect, notwithstanding her wishes for me to go about without my gun. You can not let her down in this way, and yet it will be kind of touchy subject that may not be easy for you to accomplish while keeping the peace. Good luck with it. |
August 27, 2012, 01:58 PM | #13 |
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www.familywatchdog.us/
1hogfan, Here's a site that maps out where the bad guys supposedly live if you enter just your city and state. Click the 'Legend' tab at the top left of the map and you'll see what color stands for what type offense. Next click on one of the colored blocks and see a pic of the offender. Bad guys don't always stay home, but its good to at least have your family aware of the bad guys and where they live. |
August 27, 2012, 02:04 PM | #14 |
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Does she realize that sex offenders don't get registered until after they offend (assuming they are caught and convicted)? Perhaps the lack of registered sex offenders in your area is a sign that the police there aren't particularly good at catching them?
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August 27, 2012, 02:08 PM | #15 |
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I always carry two knives with me and to be honest im with her a lot. She's a teacher so she tends to be a bit of a control freak. I'm really only alone when I go to the gym or work.
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You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe—and shudder. James 2:19 "I do not fear the man that practices ten thousand kicks one time, I fear the man that practices one kick ten thousand times." Bruce Lee |
August 27, 2012, 02:12 PM | #16 |
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ATW525,
I do like your point. I live in a town of 70,000+. I was surprised there weren't more.
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You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe—and shudder. James 2:19 "I do not fear the man that practices ten thousand kicks one time, I fear the man that practices one kick ten thousand times." Bruce Lee |
August 27, 2012, 03:06 PM | #17 | |
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Quote:
Sorry to hijack the thread. On topic: When I first got my permit my wife was sketchy about me carrying around her as well. She did not want me carrying around her family or at her workplace. As time went on and she realized that the firearm is safer when it is on my person she became ok with it. Now she doesn't even give any thought about it, it's just part of my daily attire. Be patient with your wife, she may come around. If she doesn't then remind her of why you carry... to protect her.
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August 27, 2012, 05:12 PM | #18 |
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I'm not married, but some things are not up for debate; that's one of them. My house is not a democracy, no one gets a vote on things like that, not wives, girlfriends, children, parents. No one.
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August 27, 2012, 05:22 PM | #19 | |
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Guns need to be secured. Holster, or a safe. |
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August 27, 2012, 08:00 PM | #20 |
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She does not trust your judgement.
Mike |
August 27, 2012, 08:04 PM | #21 |
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It's called concealed for a reason. If its hidden well than she should not know that your carrying.... I am
In the same boat as you. I carry no matter what she says... |
August 27, 2012, 08:26 PM | #22 |
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No guns are within reach of my daughter.
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You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe—and shudder. James 2:19 "I do not fear the man that practices ten thousand kicks one time, I fear the man that practices one kick ten thousand times." Bruce Lee |
August 27, 2012, 10:25 PM | #23 |
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Famous last words on that. If a gun isn't locked or on you - a kid can get it.
Rethink this.
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August 27, 2012, 11:17 PM | #24 | |
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Quote:
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August 28, 2012, 12:19 AM | #25 | |
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