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Old February 12, 2014, 05:42 AM   #1
johnelmore
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Just walking away...

There have been a lot of news stories in the media of folks getting killed over minor disagreements. Usually strangers who meet because of a chance encounter and the result is someone killed and the other persons life destroyed.

I guess my question is why is it so difficult for people to walk away? Why isnt walking away an option? These days when I get a strange feeling over a situation I usually walk away or walk away and call the police.

Why cant we say to ourselves..."ok, this is a bad situation and so I will just leave the area"? If someone gets injured or killed as a result of a situation then someone is going to jail whether they started it or you started it. No one gets a pass today.
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Old February 12, 2014, 07:36 AM   #2
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Sometimes you just do not have the option to walk or drive away. The other party will not just let it go.

Sometimes it is pride and fear of embarrassment in front of your peers.

Whether we like it or not, some in our society are always on the edge and ready to take things to the next level at the slightest hint of being wronged. You may have cut them off in traffic. You may have looked at them "wrong' and they took offense.

Sometimes you can defuse the situation and sometimes you can just walk away. There are people that either cannot or will not accept this as the verdict that the aggrieved party has won the argument. They will get in your face or follow you in your car or try to run you off the road or shoot at you to make their point.

You saw it in school when the bullies picked on kids smaller than themselves and just would not let up.

Sometimes you just have to fight. I think we all have that moment of revelation when you finally realize talking just isn't going to cut it any more.

For me, it was 8th grade shop class and a kid was just making my life miserable. I did not want to fight but he would not let it go.

One day, I had to crawl under one of the shop tables to retrieve a big clamp that had been kicked under there. This kid saw me crawl under and when I turned around to get back out, he had strategically positioned himself so his crotch was in my face.

That was the straw that broke the camel's back. I hit him so hard in the nads he almost became a soprano for life.

This kid never bothered me again. Sometimes that is what you have to do.
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Old February 12, 2014, 08:01 AM   #3
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I think a lot of people are afraid of being inadequate and/or disrespected and over compensate by making sure they get the last word.. or action if it escalates that high.

That, and less and less people are taught common courtesies and respect for other people while they are kids.
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Old February 12, 2014, 08:41 AM   #4
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Also keep in mind you never hear about the cases where one just walked away.
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Old February 12, 2014, 08:50 AM   #5
mete
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An old saying ---" When you carry leave your macho at home "
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Old February 12, 2014, 08:56 AM   #6
btmj
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Quote:
Also keep in mind you never hear about the cases where one just walked away.
yep... also keep in mind that some in the media have an agenda... they are always looking for stories which further their narrative that "as more people conceal carry, there will be more and more deadly confrontations which would otherwise have been a simple argument" or "the castle doctrine results in more deaths" or "stand your ground laws are a get-out-of-jail-free card for vigilantes and sociopaths"

The media chooses which stories run on the front page, and which are pushed back to page 17.
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Old February 12, 2014, 09:39 AM   #7
Brian Pfleuger
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Well, your post is written as if this is something "we" all do. It isn't. As others have already said, there are countless billions of less than pleasant interactions across this nation and world every single day and "we" walk away.

To address the underlying issue of when SOME do not walk away, no small part of the problem comes from teaching people to have high self-esteem rather than ACCURATE, correct, reasonable, realistic self-esteem. There's a lot that could be said related to that point but it's really not on topic for this thread/board.

For our purposes here, walk away. If you can't bring yourself to walk away from voluntary encounters, seek counseling. Seriously, that's a major issue. Otherwise, walk away unless there is no reasonable option for safe retreat of all innocent parties.
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Old February 12, 2014, 03:57 PM   #8
zombietactics
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Quote:
To address the underlying issue of when SOME do not walk away, no small part of the problem comes from teaching people to have high self-esteem rather than ACCURATE, correct, reasonable, realistic self-esteem. There's a lot that could be said related to that point but it's really not on topic for this thread/board.
I disagree, your comments are very spot-on and on-topic.

What I have observed over the course of my life is that people have become less able to accomplish anything of real, lasting value, and therefore invest large amounts of ego and pride in very small things.

The guy who wants to fight you because you "looked at him funny" doesn't have anything going on in his life. The only thing of value he has is a puffed-up sense of his self importance absent any tangible evidence.

The guy walking away could not care less about being "looked at funny" ... because he has too much to lose ... house, car, family, vacations, expensive hobbies, etc.
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Old February 12, 2014, 04:08 PM   #9
RX-79G
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"Pride" is a very polluted term in our society.

One thing that always amazes me is that people who have CCWs aren't the most meek and respectful people on earth, when carrying.

George Zimmerman should have been found guilty just on the basis that he had a gun AND decided to get into ANY sort of altercation - verbal or not.
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Old February 12, 2014, 04:25 PM   #10
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Quote:
One thing that always amazes me is that people who have CCWs aren't the most meek and respectful people on earth, when carrying.
Your experience runs counter to mine. Everyone I know who carries is polite and conflict-averse to a fault.
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Old February 12, 2014, 04:51 PM   #11
Dragline45
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I have no problem walking away, and will avoid escalating a situation as much as possible.

Boston is not the friendliest city, and it's pretty easy to find a fight when frequenting bars on the weekend. I can't tell you the amount of fight's that I have avoided over the years simply by just sucking up my pride and walking away.

I have had people want to fight me because I looked at them funny, bumping into them even when I sincerely apologized after, or my favorite was when I was having an argument on the phone with my girlfriend at the time and the guy walking by insisted I was talking to him and not to my girlfriend on the phone. As others said, these people have nothing else going on in their lives, and are low life's that aren't worth your time.

These day's if you fight someone you can most likely end up in handcuffs followed by a lawsuit soon after, or worse case scenario in the hospital. A friend of mines brother was punched once in the head in a bar fight and was killed, fights aren't like in the movies where you go home and slap a steak on your eye. You can be seriously injured by just a fist. The days of one on one fair fights are over. It's either you vs two of their friends, or they pull a knife or a rock or bottle on you, or they kick you while your down. It's just not worth it.

Quote:
One thing that always amazes me is that people who have CCWs aren't the most meek and respectful people on earth, when carrying.
The most responsible people I know are concealed carry holders. Since I started carrying 4 years ago I am especially cautious to avoid situations.

Quote:
George Zimmerman should have been found guilty just on the basis that he had a gun AND decided to get into ANY sort of altercation - verbal or not.
Then that would have been a total failure of our judicial system. I agree the whole situation could have been avoided and he handled it the wrong way. When you choose to carry a gun it is a big responsibility, and it is your responsibility to try to avoid violent confrontations, but the fact is he did nothing illegal.

Last edited by Dragline45; February 12, 2014 at 05:00 PM.
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Old February 12, 2014, 05:25 PM   #12
DaleA
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This is a complicated issue. There are *LOTS* of reasons people either 'go off' or walk away.

In addition to all the comments posted so far I'll add another that might sometimes come into play. If you're carrying you can CHOOSE to walk away knowing that you have options, that is, you are not defenseless.

But again, every situation is different and a lot of factors come into play.
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Old February 12, 2014, 05:26 PM   #13
zombietactics
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Quote:
George Zimmerman should have been found guilty just on the basis that he had a gun AND decided to get into ANY sort of altercation - verbal or not.
So you'd favor a law where someone has not objectively done anything more serious than using harsh language, but because they were carrying a gun it's now ... a felony? misdemeanor?

The more disturbing implication is that Zinmerman "should have been found guilty" ... being that the crime he was charged with was murder. You state your rationale as "... the basis that he had a gun AND decided to get into ANY sort of altercation - verbal or not."

Maybe you meant something else?

Last edited by zombietactics; February 12, 2014 at 05:40 PM.
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Old February 12, 2014, 05:27 PM   #14
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This dipstick society we live in today, . . . has become so involved with "self" that everything else is not important, if not throw-away.

Disrespect someone, . . . disillusion their "self" worth, . . . put them down in any infinitessimally small way, . . . you can be in a fight for your life.

For that reason I carry with a purpose, . . . and an attitude. I will be civil, try to be meek, will do every thing I can to avoid the altercation, . . . but if it cannot be avoided, . . . I'll be his/her worst apocolyptic zombie nightmare.

There is a line in every situation where it can be avoided, bypassed, forgotten, and I'll try to stay behind it, . . . as long as I can.

A number of years ago, . . . I made my 442 Olds convertible dance all it's steps, . . . work all it's magic, . . . some dude had decided to follow me, . . . and fortunately, . . . I managed to elude him. It would not have been pretty if I had been forced into my house and into my gun stash to stop whatever he had in mind.

May God bless,
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Old February 12, 2014, 05:47 PM   #15
Glenn E. Meyer
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We are now posturing and discussing good ol' George.

Thus, I think all has been said.

As George (not Zimmerman) said to Gracie (not jig-jitsu): Say good night.

Closed.
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