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Old August 17, 2012, 05:03 PM   #26
wayneinFL
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Quote:
I encouraged a friend to purchase a gun to hunt with, He later used it on himself.
Ouch.

I talked a friend through a purchase on a 20 gauge, advised him on what to buy, etc. A few years later, he shot himself with it. The kid was about my little brother's age.

He had all kinds of problems, never was real well adjusted. It was sad, but it was something that he was going to do eventually, either by literal suicide, or something else- a car wreck, a drug overdose, a fight. When I got the call, I wasn't surprised.
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Old August 17, 2012, 10:23 PM   #27
FrosSsT
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Never had someone close commit suicide - but I was in a bad car accident, and afterwords I was afraid to drive. I think that it is natural to temporarily feel nervous around the tool or thing that helped cause a moment of great pain in our lives. Time heals all.
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Old August 18, 2012, 05:28 AM   #28
Salmoneye
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Years ago, my best friend committed suicide with a Ruger Blackhawk revolver in .357Magnum. I was a pallbearer at his funeral, and it was a tough time for me. I guess I was lucky to come to understand at least a large part of why he did what he did, what he was going through at the time, and to realize that how he committed suicide was totally unimportant--the issue was why.

I think that at some level, we all find within ourselves a desire to shift the focus or blame away from where it belongs to avoid having to deal with the real issues involved. It was ultimately a decision HE made and carried out. The gun he used to accomplish his purpose was just a tool and didn't do anything other than function as it was designed to do.

I'm sorry for your loss.
I have nothing I could possibly add to that...
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Old August 18, 2012, 09:46 AM   #29
BlueTrain
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The only thing I could add here is that nobody will kill themselves intentionally just because there happens to be a gun in the house. No one kills themselves without a reason. Unfortunately, I thnk it cannot be denied that a gun just might make it easier. While I've known a few who did shoot themselves, it seems like I've reaad of just as many who found another way.
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Old August 18, 2012, 05:53 PM   #30
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I'm sorry to hear about your loss.
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Old August 18, 2012, 09:12 PM   #31
geetarman
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Please accept my condolences on your loss.

I really am at a loss for words to respond.
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Old October 21, 2012, 09:04 PM   #32
InigoMontoya
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UPDATE:

This weekend was the season opener for quail. Myself and a few coworkers went on a camping/hunting trip. Had a blast. Didn't get any birds (drought has really taken it's toll!), but had a lot of fun.

The "best" part (if that word applies) was that I was an hour into the hunt the first time I thought about my dad. I was tired from walking so I sat down on a rock to rest and it hit me... There I was, comfortably sitting down with a shotgun in my lap... The last pose my father struck. I thought about how easy it would be to do it myself.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not suicidal or depressed. When I say "how easy it would be" I'm referencing the physical act, not expressing any sort of desire.

So sitting on the rock was a decidedly sobering buzzkill moment but after I got back up and started walking again I was back in the game.

In summary: The scars are obviously still there, but the mental aversion has been overcome.



On a side note: A few weeks ago I bought a (replica) Remmington Model 1858. I'd never fired cap and ball before and the purchase was an impulse buy. But I brought it along as something to play with in camp... Great fun!
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Old October 21, 2012, 09:15 PM   #33
RamItOne
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Congrats.
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Old October 21, 2012, 09:29 PM   #34
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Quote:
The scars are obviously still there, but the mental aversion has been overcome.
That's a start. Dealing with grief isn't a destination; it's a journey.
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Old October 21, 2012, 10:19 PM   #35
CWKahrFan
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Good news... Thanks for telling... We're with you.
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Old October 22, 2012, 05:26 AM   #36
Salmoneye
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I understand the feeling that you had on that rock...

I'm glad you walked away...
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Old October 22, 2012, 04:00 PM   #37
Scouse
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Sorry for your loss. You are clearly a strong fellow.
All the best to you and yours.
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Old October 22, 2012, 05:28 PM   #38
Sparks1957
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Quote:
I understand the feeling that you had on that rock...
I understand too, and I'm glad you're still here with us. All my best.
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Old October 23, 2012, 11:08 PM   #39
InigoMontoya
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I just reread this thread...

In my original post I mention the smell. As I sit here, I can't remember the smell. Am I doing better because I'm blocking things out, or is this simply time making memories fuzzy (as it is prone to doing)?
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Old October 23, 2012, 11:51 PM   #40
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People are supposed to forget and memories are supposed to fade with time. That's normal. It keeps us sane.
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Old October 24, 2012, 03:59 AM   #41
rebs
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My condolences to you and your family. I pray you continue to move forward.
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