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I've played both extensively with friends. Airsoft just doesn't get my heart pumping quite as much as paintball simply because the damn plastic bb's tend not to hurt that much. Granted, paintballs aren't like a massive shock to the system, but I can usuallly feel it for a while after everyone goes home, and it can friggin hurt sometimes.
That said, it depends on what skills you're trying to develop. If it's decision making in stressful situations, then paintball gets the nod. If it's learning your weapons controls in a stressful situation, than airsoft with a weapon set up the same as yours. If it's learning how to use your gear, than also, airsoft since you would be able to use the same mag carriers etc. If it's close quarters training, I'd also say airsoft, as you will become more familiar with your weapon that way. But I have to say I DO like paintball out in the woods better, as even if it's not accurate, you can hurl paint farther than a plastic bb. I also like ambushes better with paintball, as when you get hit LOTS of times, it sinks the lesson in deeper than with LOTS of airsoft bb's.
But for decision making when the adrenaline starts going, I'd say paintball. Nothing has ever gotten me going so much as hauling ass through the woods with paintballs busting all around me trying to link up with the main body of my team (I went flanking with one other person, the other team ambushed us). And when you get hit, chances are you KNOW it. I've volunteered to get pelted by multiple people with airsoft guns, back turned, to show new people that it doesn't hurt THAT much, but I would NEVER do that with paintball...
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