As far as .357 Mag is concerned for SD, if I used it I would favor 158 gr Gold Dots @ 1250 fps. They should be slightly (  ) easier on your ears and eyes, but not easy at all on the poor wretch hit by them.
The "nuclear" 125s @ 1450+ fps are simply murderous on your ears, too much to be practical IMO. Some of the tamer 125s like Golden Sabers are still very, very deadly and not quite as punishing to the shooter.
I do have some custom loaded 158s @ 1450 fps, they are fun for destroying things. 
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Mauser Werke, Schmidt-Rubin, Colt, Walther, HK, Weatherby, Sig Sauer, Browning, Ruger, Beretta, etc, etc....a few friends of mine
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