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I haven't tried to use this in a long time but it used to work very especially on the weekends.
Get to a popular bar sometime between 1 and 2 am sober. Leave drunk about an hour later. I used to almost always end up with a hog when doing this. It never failed.
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"Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag and begin slitting throats." H.L. Mencken
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