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You have a balancing act in regards to the GF's ability to hold the gun up (weight of weapon and fit) and felt recoil (accelerating mass reacting on weapon weight and action type as distributed through the stock to her shoulder).
One of the most critical parts that is overlooked by many is the fit of the gun to the shooter. If the fit is poor, the felt recoil is usually translated in ways like cheek slap, shoulder digging, or other unamusing ways. If the LOP is too long and you have to lean back to hold the gun up, you really feel the kick. Conversely inf the LOP is way too short, you could get a knuckle in the cheek from the recoil because you are crawled up on the stock. Unfortunately off the shelf guns don't fit people out of the first standard deviation of height and build well at all. The bigger problem is that the manufacutrers base the norm on men.....women present a differing height and build profile to the mix. Most "Youth" models only have a shortened stock, they do nothing to move the trigger closer to the wrist or reprofile the wrist for smaller hands.
Whether shotgun or carbine, the GF should try on many different guns and find what feels good (something that shoulders well and she can easily get to the trigger. Once the field is narrowed, she should test fire as many as possible to find what she likes. Caliber / Gauge is secondary.
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