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Requisite Monday morning quarterbacking: - and this is something I'm trying to ingrain in myself - go ahead and get that flashlight on him right away. I think you were right in not clearing leather yet, but I think we are all a little to worried about being "rude" and lighting a questionable petitioner up. We should all have "tactical" grade flashlights, and should put them in play as soon as things start to deviate from Baseline Mayberry Standard.
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I too have gotten into carrying a flashlight at most times (I don't if I know for a fact that I will be home before the sun goes down) and I am not tactical.
I carry a single AAA LED $3 pen style light from Wally World that I put in my mouth (switched on, of course) and exit my vehicle.
I realize that it could make my head a target , but most BG's are going to have their eyes blinded by that intense LED in the dark.
In one pocket is a hand on a gun...
In the other is the house keys...
I do adjust accordingly when I have to carry packages into the house.
I dare some stupid, unprepared azzhat to think he is going to get his way with me.