There are three things we are talking about here, not two:
Manual Safety, such as on the M1911
Decocker, where it decocks the hammer (only), such as on the SIG and some HKs
Decocker/Safety, such as on the Beretta and S&W, where it decocks the hammer and prevents the gun from firing when you pull the trigger
There's also a fourth option for semi-auto pistols, the type of action found on many striker-fired guns, exemplified by the Glock.
I don't see anything wrong with the decocker or decocker/safety as far as risk of the gun discharging. The double-action trigger is quite safe.
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I can see where someone might not be comfortable with only the longer and heavier double action pull as the "safety"
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Double-action revolvers have been used for over a hundred years, and no one calls them unsafe or demands that they have a manual safety.
The risk I do see with a decocker/safety is that the gun will be in the wrong mode the instant you need to fire, and with the position mounted high on the slide, it's not a natural movement to sweep off the safety (such as it is on the M1911), and it can be almost unreachable for many of us, at least without breaking our proper grip on the gun.
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Too many times I've checked the safety on the 1911, "cocked & locked" and discover that it somehow got "unlocked" in the holster.
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I've had the same thing happen, many times, with a holstered Beretta, with the decocker/safety. Not quite as dangerous in terms of unintentional discharge, but disturbing enough that I don't much like that form of safety.
My preference, for a self-defense gun, would be a decocker like the SIG, or something like the Glock or Springfield XD. I want to be 100% confident that it will fire when I pull the trigger.