[Tom Servo]

Here are a few things that spring to mind.

• This is a store for grown-ups. No attempt has been, or will be, made to child-proof it. That means there might be sharp edges to bump into and fragile stuff within reach.
• Yes, it's a store for adults. That doesn't mean we resort to casual profanity or sentiments unsuited for polite company.
• I don't want to hear politics. I've heard every conspiracy theory, every hackneyed slogan, and every possible pun on the President's name. It doesn't endear someone to me.
• We don't stay in business long by not knowing the law. If I say something is illegal, that means it's illegal.
• Nudges and winks, or "let's say I know a guy" don't make the discussion of illegal topics any more acceptable.
• The same goes for bigotry of any sort. I have valued clients of all proclivities, all heritages, and all walks of life. Again, nudges and winks don't make crass comments about "those people" any more acceptable.
• Yes we have OMG WOMEN WORKING AT A GUN STORE. They are not range bunnies or window dressing. They're here because they know their stuff, and they're good with people. They know just as much as the guys do, and some stuff we don't.
• "What's a good gun for a woman who's not here, who's never shot one, and who I'm pressuring into it" is a question that makes my blood boil. There is literally no honest or responsible way I can answer that.
• There is no such thing as an unloaded gun. Ever. If someone yanks a gun out of a holster or bag, I'm going to insist on them proving it clear. I'm amazed by the frequency and vehemence of conversations I have over that.
• I refuse to put a "clearing bucket" or any other such contraption on the premises. If there's an expectation of handling a gun on the floor, it needs to be cleared before it's brought in.
• "I'm a cop/P.I./ninja/knew a guy" doesn't excuse a lack of safety.
• I hand guns to customers with the action open. Believe it or not, it's a real novelty when they have the courtesy to hand them back the same way. Slapping the action shut and dry-firing at my crotch does not earn bonus points.
• It would be really nice if folks asked before dry-firing weapons. It would. While it won't hurt most firearms, it can hurt rimfires and certain older actions. If I say not to, there's a reason.
• "I don't want the one that's been touched by other people. I want one fresh in the box" is especially galling when it comes from someone who just showed an utter disregard for the prior two points. It's fiscally and logistically unfeasible to double inventory just to satisfy someone who doesn't understand that these are tools.
• There are, of course, some exceptions to that last point. Those guns are marked "serious inquiries only" for a reason, and I'm not going to hand them to someone who's shown carelessness with our other wares.
• I will not allow someone to handle a gun and its corresponding ammunition at the same time. They can examine one or the other. This policy is based on several close calls and a few (fortunately injury-free) calamities.
• If I never hear the words "Call of Duty" again, it will be too soon.
• Same goes for any conversation in which a Dremel tool is mentioned. We have gunsmiths because they know how to do some things better than the rest of the general populace.
• If I have some down time, I'm glad to elaborate on neat historical or technical stuff. I enjoy a good conversation. That said, I may be able to do that on a slow Monday. Don't take it personally if I can't take the same time on a busy Friday.
• Our time is money. Like any asset, we have to make good use of it. Margins stink, and assets can get stretched thin. I can't devote 4 exclusive hours of my time to sell a Glock that only nets us $40 in margin (and even less in profit).
• We stock products we have a chance at selling. I'm not going to order the $5000 custom Loudenboomer .560 in this month's gun rag just so folks can fondle it. For stuff like that, we're going to insist on a nonrefundable deposit.
• There are some product lines and brands we refuse to carry. That's because those have a verifiable track record of being unreliable or unsafe. Liability is a concern, and we tread lightly in that area.
• The person I treasure most is the person who admits their ignorance. It tells me where we stand, and it gives me a starting point for a constructive conversation. When I hear, "I need an EDC for CQB zombies and for 1000-yard MOA knockdown power," I know I'm in for a long, painful conversation.

I'm sure there are others. I'll add them as they come to mind.