[Stressfire]

I want the best brand but the lowest price. It has to be right by my house. I don't want to drive very far. It should be open 24 hours. I have a really bad schedule and if you want my business you better be open all the time. I expect to be treated like royalty even if I am not buying anything. The bathrooms better be clean or I am leaving. The store must have anything I need. I have no time to go by several stores. And like the OP alluded to , by George I expect the minimum wage clerk to be Albert Einstein , John Browning and Davey Crockett all flipping rolled into one or I am taking my business elsewhere. And I am not waiting or standing in line!

That is the best thing I have read all week!