On the other hand, it could be argued that since you have aquired a handgun carry license, you are, from a legal standpoint, squeaky clean. and from an ethical standpoint on solid ground. You are jumping through all the hoops to aquire said license, and this points toward a healthy concern for your own, and your families safety
Seriously, Having gone through an almost identical circumstance, do whatever you must to take a lawyer to court with you on this. If she does not have one, all the better.