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Scout,
That's unfortunate that you (Moreover your wife) had to endure that. I catch grief from the old(er) guys at the LGS when I go out of my way to answer a women's questions, ease her fears etc. I have taught hundreds of women to shoot and they appreciate the attention to their concerns.
Most importantly, I hope you find a place where you can ALL shoot together. My bride of 16 years still does not like to shoot. She says "That's why I have you"
Stay Safe
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