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Old October 12, 2011, 04:22 PM   #6
WANT A LCR 22LR
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Join Date: September 5, 2010
Posts: 389
" In other words the threat from Mr. Sheehan had abated by his own actions; all Mrs. Sheehan needed to do was bolt out the door. "

Oh it isn't that simple. Threat from Mr S never goes away until he is dead, and even then there will be lingering fear.

A former lady friend got sucked into a verbally abusive marriage despite her friends pointing out where the relationship was going. It started out fine, he treated her great then slowly turned into a controlling monster over 5-7 years. Living under such conditions is like living in a war zone, the stress never lets up. This threat is constant and is no way like the pharm guy that had a random threat present it self then continued to fire after the threat was down.

As for walking out, the receiver of the abuse has a difficult time doing that. Some of it is that they have no where to go, sometimes it is the stigma of "you belong in the kitchen, so stop whining " ( or the much more rare "you are the man of the house, stand up for your self " ). A lot of it is the faint hope that good guy will reappear at some point. When someone is told they are worthless over and over, they tend to place high value on the little bits of praise that comes their way when it comes from a person that they had truly loved early on.

With great effort said lady friend extracted he self from the situation. Although she is a tiny gal, she has incredible mental strength and isn't a helpless girlie girl. ( lets see, dirt / street bike riding, parachuting, parasailing, scuba, on and on. ) To show how difficult it is to recognize and to extract ones self from such a situation is, she is a clinical psychologist, that amongst other things , deals with marriage issues. Many of her friends are in the profession as well.

Now, can the battered spouse defense sometimes be missused? Well sure, any defense can, but that is no reason to discount for those truly in need.
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