IMO these conversations were of significant importance many years ago during the era of FMJ and very few HP options across the caliber spectrum. Conversely, the remarkable ballistic advances the ammo vendors have made in the past ten or so years has (again IMO) rendered very little performance "difference" between the 9, 40, 45 in terms of ultimate effectiveness. Verdict, get the model gun that suits you in whatever caliber and shoot the crap out of it thereby achieving that often underlooked variable of requite skill.
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“A free people ought...to be armed..."