Ok, please don't take this the wrong way. You have no business picking your wife's gun. You are different from her, what works for you does not work for her.
You need to sign her up for a shooting class taught by and for ladies. Someone like our very own PAX. That needs to happen before all other things. After her class, then give her the budgeted money allowed for the gun and leave her alone. She needs to pick her own gun that actually fits her, not what you like and think she should have.
Secondly for the love of god don't saddle her with a snubby for her first gun. Those are not suitable for beginners, horrid sights and harsh recoil is not conducive to training.
She needs training specific to her needs, and another qualified female who has lots of training and experience to help her pick what fits her..
It annoys me to no end when husbands try to purchase guns for there first time shooter wife. They always end up buying what the husband wants not what the wife needs for her first gun.
Edit to add, IF she has the magazine in the gun, why is she trying to sling shot the gun? Why not do the simple maneuver that is guaranteed to work and use the slide release? Unless your trying to saddle her with a micro gun that lacks one.