I have a KAHR CM 9. The little brother of the CW series. Also a Springfield XD40 Sub Compact. Neither of which I find objectionable to shoot. Most range sessions with either see usually between 50 and 100 rounds fired. That is also most likely along with a couple hundred rounds of various handgun, and rifle calibers.
If you are bothered that much by recoil you might consider a 32ACP, or even a 22 rimfire. Something I personally wouldn't have as much confidence in to stop a threat, but better than a rock or sharp stick.
Cheapshooter's rules of gun ownership #1: NEVER SELL OR TRADE ANYTHING!