She has to pick for herself, but try and get a kahr K9 into her hands. I spent about a year trying to find a gun for my girlfriend and this is the best option we came up with. The grip is narrow/small without being too short for her to get a full grip on it. It has nice soft rubber panels so it isn't slippery (or overly abrasive) as some polymer guns can be. Trigger is a VERY smooth double action.
The CW9 from kahr has basically the same top end and trigger, but a polymer frame. Its close to a pound lighter than the K9. If she likes the feel of the grip it may be a good option too. I wanted the extra weight of the stainless frame to help with recoil, and the rubber grips are an added bonus.
Fix it right the first time...
Use Baling Wire !