An old favorite in lightweight revolvers is Federal's 125gr standard pressure NyClad. This loading reportedly has very mild recoil and the dead soft lead construction of it supposedly expands well even at low velocity. The downside is that, in the gelatin tests I've seen, penetration is a touch on the shallow side (about 10") but that's a judgment call on your part. Another loading you may look into is Hornady's 110gr Critical Defense. Due to the construction of the bullet, it seems to be able to penetrate decently while still expanding reliably (doing both is problematic for most 110gr .38 Special loads).
Smith, and Wesson, and Me. -H. Callahan
Well waddaya know, one buwwet weft! -E. Fudd
All bad precedents begin as justifiable measures. -J. Caesar