Why a semi-auto pistol? Seems a Revolver would be a better fit for her....No slide to rack, no safety to fiddle with, no magazine to worry about. J-frame Smiths often fit small and relatively weak hands.
If she's not into guns, she may not have the patience to train with all of the features that make a semi-auto unsuitable for her. Small size autos have little surface to get a grip on for the racking motion, and their recoil and mainsprings are often stronger too...just compounding a difficult situation.
If you're dead set on getting a semi-auto for her...at least take her to a large gun shop or range and let her pick it out herself.
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An Loc, lll Corps, RVN, 69-70, Vietnam Vet '69-'73