I Am surprised that most on this forum are advising you to carry con 1 without knowing what level of training or experience you have with firearms. In a children's playground etc.
As for thinking about what might happen when you are not carrying that's human nature and what will happen if you decide to carry a firearm.
PS You said that the only time you don't think of carrying is when you are in bed or shower. Give it time some on this forum won't take a shower without a firearm.