How much handgun shooting experience do you have?
How is you and your wifes hand strength?
Any issues with arthritis?
My mother is 68, I tried to set her up with an automatic. She could not operate it well.
My brother and I have since set her up with a DA revolver that she could.
My experience with .380 is unless it is one of the "oversize" ones like the Beretta Cheetah, it will be much more painful to shoot than a 9mm.
Best bet would be either going to a range and trying out several guns or getting a friend you know to let you try some out.
I am no longer participating in gun forums.