You've got to learn to lie better, bswiv.
They catch 'em half that size on TV and they're "1,000 pound monsters". Yours MUST be a ton. Easy.
Still happily answering to the call-sign Peetza.
The problem, as you so eloquently put it, is choice.
He is no fool who gives what he can not keep to gain what he can not lose.
-Jim Eliott, paraphrasing Philip Henry.