I have loaded many thousands of rounds for my .44 mag.
Your objective of getting more recoil is, indeed, bizarre. I hesitate to share my loads with you.
I'll say this, for low velocity, low recoil loads I use 231 and light charges.
For most other rounds I have pretty much settled on H110 although several other powders do perform well.
My favorite bullets are Keith style SWC in extra-hard cast lead. All the weights you mention will perform well with proper loads.
From your question and statements, I surmise you have not referenced a reloading manual. That is the first, and most important, piece of equipment a reloader should acquire.