+1 to Paxs post.
My wife used to be like you describe, not wanting me to carry. So in trying to please her and keep the peace, I left it at home when we would go out together. I felt that I didn't have her permission and did not want to stir anything up between us, so felt that not carrying it was a good decision.
One night we're out lollygagging around town and she must have gotten goosebumps or something and suddenly turns to me and says...but you do have your gun, right?
Just like that, in a moment, she relinquished her authority (sic) and position about not wanting me to carry, and fully expected me to have it and be able to protect her. Uh-oh...I let her down that night (luckily nothing happened) and was not fully prepared. I learned a valuable lesson.
She rightfully expected me to be prepared in spite of household politics. I'm not saying lie to your Wife or to bully her into letting you carry, but rather, there is a higher level of duty to protect, notwithstanding her wishes for me to go about without my gun. You can not let her down in this way, and yet it will be kind of touchy subject that may not be easy for you to accomplish while keeping the peace. Good luck with it.