totaldla, you seem to be deliberately missing the point: a stated goal of shooting to stop is very different, in the eyes of the law, than a stated goal of shooting to kill.
It goes to intent and mens rea. If you don't understand the concept, please look up those terms.
As far as your contention that people who train to shoot to stop, and who state a goal of shooting to stop, are in some kind of denial about deadly force - you might want to check gunshot wound survival stats. They may be higher than you think.
If I were to have to employ deadly force, I accept that it might have fatal effect. If so, that would be an unfortunate necessity. OTOH, should I employ deadly force, and stop the assailant without killing him, that would be fine with me. The death of the BG in such a scenario would have been an acceptable risk, but not the goal.
It's a matter of desired end state.
Your arguments are going to paint you in a very negative light, should you ever draw and fire in self defense.