No perfect bullet, no perfect solution
Much is said about one's responsibility for the end result of every round or every pellet sent down range. But in reality, could that be construed to mean that one should not shoot a dangerous perp if the background is not optimal???
What are you going to do? Re-holster and hope the next time the circumstances are better?
Up close and dangerous, my choice would be buckshot, and at room distance it doesn't really matter if we are talking 12 or 20, 00 or 4, low recoil or standard. At room distance, what is important is massive power and quick. Another good choice would be .223 hollow point or frangible, or any fat-bullet handgun round with hollow points. I'd even throw in .38+p.
Over-penetration can partially avoided by ammo choice. Misses sailing off into the distance can be partially avoided by training and skill. That's about where it stands. Using the BGs body as the bullet stop is the best deal.